From out of the Grayness
Viewing comments for Chapter 7 "Carpathias Dream: by: His Grayness"Reaching from the gray areas to understand life
24 total reviews
Comment from royowen
I really enjoyed this beautiful poem written with all the mustered pathos you can gather! I would liked to have seen some notes to interpret the mysteries hidden in the narrative! " Carpathias! " conjures up darkness, but then I'm not sure. So there are a lot of unanswered questions. Just a couple of clues would have made the narrative enjoyable and absorbing! Your friend, Roy. Sorry I didn't read further about " Carpathias" bleetings. Roy.
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2014
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I really enjoyed this beautiful poem written with all the mustered pathos you can gather! I would liked to have seen some notes to interpret the mysteries hidden in the narrative! " Carpathias! " conjures up darkness, but then I'm not sure. So there are a lot of unanswered questions. Just a couple of clues would have made the narrative enjoyable and absorbing! Your friend, Roy. Sorry I didn't read further about " Carpathias" bleetings. Roy.
Comment Written 25-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2014
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Dear Roy: Many thanks and I noted in author notes that the ship Carpathias was first to arrive to assist the sinking TITANIC. Glad you enjoyed and many thanks, Vance
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I must admit I didn't know. That would've made a huge difference! It would have lifted the very well written work, and might help others. It would give the poem more impetus! Blessings, Roy.
Comment from Preston McWhorter
Hi, Vance,
"Carpathias Dream" is an excellent free verse poem with excellent figurative language and imagery (every protein in my mass, axle of desire). It has good flow and a good unconventional structure. I think it would be good to define or tell where to find out about "carpathias" as the word is not in dictionary.com and requires some research to determine the source of the allusion.
Preston
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2014
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Hi, Vance,
"Carpathias Dream" is an excellent free verse poem with excellent figurative language and imagery (every protein in my mass, axle of desire). It has good flow and a good unconventional structure. I think it would be good to define or tell where to find out about "carpathias" as the word is not in dictionary.com and requires some research to determine the source of the allusion.
Preston
Comment Written 25-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2014
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Dear Preston, author notes define Carpathias as the first ship to assist the sinking Titanic but perhaps a bit to easy to misss. I shall go back and edit. Many thanks, Vance
Comment from Nosha17
Good analogy between the sinking ship and our own life floundering and in need of help. You have made excellent choice of words to convey your message and it was a smooth read. Super illustration and enjoyable read. Faye
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reply by the author on 25-Feb-2014
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Good analogy between the sinking ship and our own life floundering and in need of help. You have made excellent choice of words to convey your message and it was a smooth read. Super illustration and enjoyable read. Faye
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Comment Written 25-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2014
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Thanks Faye...much appreciated....Vance
Comment from seaglass
The sea inspires in so many ways and to compare it to life principles seems so natural. We are all a bit like ships. And it's not so much the storms of the seas that matter, but how we set our sails.
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reply by the author on 25-Feb-2014
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The sea inspires in so many ways and to compare it to life principles seems so natural. We are all a bit like ships. And it's not so much the storms of the seas that matter, but how we set our sails.
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Comment Written 25-Feb-2014
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2014
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Thanks so much seaglass.....much appreciated. Vance
