On a Clear Day?
A Kyrielle Sonnet32 total reviews
Comment from rouskin
Well written with good flow , rhyme and excellent complimentary photo that grabs my attention from the start Really well done
Thank you for sharing and have a great week
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2014
Well written with good flow , rhyme and excellent complimentary photo that grabs my attention from the start Really well done
Thank you for sharing and have a great week
Comment Written 26-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2014
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Thank you so much for taking the time to read and review.
Comment from Dorothy Farrell
This is a very well written Kyrielle Sonnet. Perfect flow with good eight syllable lines throughout. You are forgiven for non rhyming lines - I have no idea if this is in order but it works well - lovely repeating lines and perfect 14 lines. Very good. Regards Dorothy
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2014
This is a very well written Kyrielle Sonnet. Perfect flow with good eight syllable lines throughout. You are forgiven for non rhyming lines - I have no idea if this is in order but it works well - lovely repeating lines and perfect 14 lines. Very good. Regards Dorothy
Comment Written 26-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2014
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Thank you so much for taking the time to read and review.
Comment from Leineco
It's beautifully lyrical, and the rhyme scheme is perfectly done with subtle,
rather than blaring, rhymes. But I am not sure what I think of the introduction
of the word star (though clearly the star in question is the sun), I think I would
have preferred "Ol' Sol" and "sol" respectively.. . . but that's just
personal taste :)
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2014
It's beautifully lyrical, and the rhyme scheme is perfectly done with subtle,
rather than blaring, rhymes. But I am not sure what I think of the introduction
of the word star (though clearly the star in question is the sun), I think I would
have preferred "Ol' Sol" and "sol" respectively.
personal taste :)
Comment Written 24-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2014
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Thank you so much for taking the time to read and review.
Comment from mrgrunty
Hello my sweet!
This was really good. So this is the technical name for some of the stuff I use in my own writing! lol
Great flow and the meter was a solid 8. The only bit that caught me was the start of the 2nd stanza. This I think was because the end rhymes in the 1st, while not supposed to, were close in sound tricking my brain into thinking that the whole verse should rhyme.
After a shot upside the head with an acme frying pan, the rest of the piece flowed like a slow melancholy thought.
Hugs Jo-Lo
g x
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2014
Hello my sweet!
This was really good. So this is the technical name for some of the stuff I use in my own writing! lol
Great flow and the meter was a solid 8. The only bit that caught me was the start of the 2nd stanza. This I think was because the end rhymes in the 1st, while not supposed to, were close in sound tricking my brain into thinking that the whole verse should rhyme.
After a shot upside the head with an acme frying pan, the rest of the piece flowed like a slow melancholy thought.
Hugs Jo-Lo
g x
Comment Written 24-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2014
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Oh tricking you was I. Well that sounds like fun, so sorry love. Hugs back.
Comment from l.raven
Your poem makes me miss Illinois... I miss the snow...I'm in Florida with my daughter...I love this...but Spring in on it's way for some...very well written...Luff Linda xxoo
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2014
Your poem makes me miss Illinois... I miss the snow...I'm in Florida with my daughter...I love this...but Spring in on it's way for some...very well written...Luff Linda xxoo
Comment Written 24-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2014
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ahhh I have snow again today, brrrrr, thanks for the warm review.
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HI dawn, where are you??? It's below zero in Illinois...lol
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Colorado, not near as cold as you guys right now
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I always wanted to go to Colorado...was told it was beautiful...I think we are the coldest in the country today and tomorrow so far...
Comment from Righteous Riter
This meets the criteria of the Kyrielle Sonnet as the rhyme scheme is correct and this piece has the correct number of lines totaling 14. Good alliteration with breezes/brush...summer/sun...droplets/deceive...startled/star...lost/lead. Good eye catching photo followed by a good message.
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2014
This meets the criteria of the Kyrielle Sonnet as the rhyme scheme is correct and this piece has the correct number of lines totaling 14. Good alliteration with breezes/brush...summer/sun...droplets/deceive...startled/star...lost/lead. Good eye catching photo followed by a good message.
Comment Written 24-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2014
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Thank you so much for taking the time to read and review.
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
The lulling summer sun will grieve
when chilling breezes brush the trees;
the lulling summer sun will grieve.
this is really rather lovely, your words
setting the scene. Most enjoyable, Dawn.
margaret
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2014
The lulling summer sun will grieve
when chilling breezes brush the trees;
the lulling summer sun will grieve.
this is really rather lovely, your words
setting the scene. Most enjoyable, Dawn.
margaret
Comment Written 24-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 27-Jan-2014
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Thank you so much for taking the time to read and review.
Comment from Maureen's Pen
Dear Dawn - this is a lovely work with solid rhyme and easy flow. It has such a haunting sense of impact on me. Sorrow can at times give us new perspectives. I found myself pausing, your images were just stunning.
I especially liked your final couplet:
"when chilling breezes brush the trees;
the lulling summer sun will grieve. " // wonderful imagery, and haunting sorrow.
Thanks for sharing it.
Maureen
reply by the author on 24-Jan-2014
Dear Dawn - this is a lovely work with solid rhyme and easy flow. It has such a haunting sense of impact on me. Sorrow can at times give us new perspectives. I found myself pausing, your images were just stunning.
I especially liked your final couplet:
"when chilling breezes brush the trees;
the lulling summer sun will grieve. " // wonderful imagery, and haunting sorrow.
Thanks for sharing it.
Maureen
Comment Written 24-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 24-Jan-2014
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OH Maureen, what a beautiful and touching review. I do so appreciate your time and your words. And you were my 25th review so I really am smiling now. Thank you so very much.
Comment from Janie King
Well, I'm not a poet so even though you gave instructions for Kryielle I'm dense enough I'm still walking around as in a forest but that doesn't keep me from enjoying the poem and thinking it is excellently done. I love the picture too. God loves you and I do too.
reply by the author on 24-Jan-2014
Well, I'm not a poet so even though you gave instructions for Kryielle I'm dense enough I'm still walking around as in a forest but that doesn't keep me from enjoying the poem and thinking it is excellently done. I love the picture too. God loves you and I do too.
Comment Written 24-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 24-Jan-2014
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Thanks so very much and God Bless you.
Comment from beautyseeker
Excellent rhyming kryielle here i especially loved the rhyme and stanza " as detrimental winds apoear, believed, grieve,clear, grieve... Well done!
reply by the author on 24-Jan-2014
Excellent rhyming kryielle here i especially loved the rhyme and stanza " as detrimental winds apoear, believed, grieve,clear, grieve... Well done!
Comment Written 24-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 24-Jan-2014
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Thank you so much I really appreciate your time to read and review.