LOST AND NOW FOUND
christina finds herself along a broken road3 total reviews
Comment from baileyybee
I really enjoyed the story itself. It was really interesting and it kept me wanting more. There are a few writing mistakes such as spelling and misplaced quotation marks. It happens though. My writings are filled with mistakes but I enjoy being corrected so that I can fix them. Some of the sentences are constructed a little strangely. For example, the last sentence would sound better if written like this, "After the 'horrific' day, I decided to stay in the living room and watch t.v until I finally fell asleep around 5 am."
Hope that helps a bit!!
xoxoxo
reply by the author on 19-Dec-2013
I really enjoyed the story itself. It was really interesting and it kept me wanting more. There are a few writing mistakes such as spelling and misplaced quotation marks. It happens though. My writings are filled with mistakes but I enjoy being corrected so that I can fix them. Some of the sentences are constructed a little strangely. For example, the last sentence would sound better if written like this, "After the 'horrific' day, I decided to stay in the living room and watch t.v until I finally fell asleep around 5 am."
Hope that helps a bit!!
xoxoxo
Comment Written 16-Dec-2013
reply by the author on 19-Dec-2013
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thank you so much glade you enjoyed it.
Comment from Teagan Rose Horton
wow this is excellent, you have used such great techniques, your writing is so precise and profound, i loved reading this, you have such great talent and enthusiasm, i hope to read more from you, have a blessed day
reply by the author on 06-Dec-2013
wow this is excellent, you have used such great techniques, your writing is so precise and profound, i loved reading this, you have such great talent and enthusiasm, i hope to read more from you, have a blessed day
Comment Written 06-Dec-2013
reply by the author on 06-Dec-2013
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well thank you :) this has happened to my friend, getting her story out!
Comment from kiwisteveh
Hi, Gabby - welcome to FanStory - hope you like it here.
You might want to think about assigning your story to the story side! You have entered it in a 5-7-5 poetry contest - that may be why you're not getting much reaction to it as yet.
If you do re-post it, you should also look at editing it a bit - you certainly need to break it up into smaller chunks (paragraphs) just to make it readable.
You have a good strong start and a bit of a mystery at the end, but you could also do some more proof-reading to catch spelling and grammar errors - they call them 'spags' on this site.
Cheers
Steve
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2013
Hi, Gabby - welcome to FanStory - hope you like it here.
You might want to think about assigning your story to the story side! You have entered it in a 5-7-5 poetry contest - that may be why you're not getting much reaction to it as yet.
If you do re-post it, you should also look at editing it a bit - you certainly need to break it up into smaller chunks (paragraphs) just to make it readable.
You have a good strong start and a bit of a mystery at the end, but you could also do some more proof-reading to catch spelling and grammar errors - they call them 'spags' on this site.
Cheers
Steve
Comment Written 03-Dec-2013
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2013
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Thanks Steve really helps. As you can see im new and that really helps thanks again!
Gabby
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No problem - I can remember how new and scary it all was when I joined up - you have to be a little bit of a masochist to put your work (and sometimes your life) out there for other people to criticise.
I am sure you'll get the hang of it soon enough. Reading lots of what other people are writing is a good start.
Steve
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thanks again!