Comment from lancellot

Excellent

Funny. He made not have been a 'wise guy' but at least you made him keep his wise cracking attitude in the face of sudden death and a gun aimed at him. Well done.

 Comment Written 12-Nov-2013

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reply by the author on 13-Nov-2013

Thanks so much for reading my story. Your kind words and generous review are greatly appreciated! I wasn't sure how many people would catch that and I'm glad that you did.

Comment from Matthew M.

Excellent

That's a bad day! Smart decision to promote this so high because this is a fun story. I think you might have a winner with this one.

 Comment Written 12-Nov-2013

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reply by the author on 13-Nov-2013

Thanks so much for reading my story. Your kind words and generous review are greatly appreciated! I got a kick out of writing this and will be happy as along as a few of you readers get a laugh out of it. Smiless

Comment from Barb Hensongispsaca

Excellent

Oh this is so cute. You have my vote it is absolutely unbelievable and yet enjoyable.
I don't do good at writing short stories so I am amazed at those who do

 Comment Written 12-Nov-2013

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reply by the author on 12-Nov-2013

Thanks so much for taking time to read my story. Your kind words and generous review are greatly appreciated! So glad you liked it Barb.

Comment from humpwhistle

Excellent

You know, I like your story. It has a very noir irony to it. thinks contests are hare to judge, because some people write their stories using the required words as punctuation, while other try to make the word unobtrusive.
Nice job.

Peace, Lee

 Comment Written 12-Nov-2013

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reply by the author on 12-Nov-2013

Thanks, Lee, for taking time to read my story. Your kind words and generous review are greatly appreciated!

Comment from Nosha17

Excellent

Explosive story in 100 words, approximately. Well-written, full of suspense, with good narrative and dialogue. Thank you for sharing. Faye

 Comment Written 12-Nov-2013

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reply by the author on 12-Nov-2013

Thanks so much, Faye, for taking time to read my story. Your kind words and generous review are greatly appreciated!

Comment from jmdg1954

Excellent

Good story in the 100-150 word range. Also you had a good use of the contests required words, not forcing any of them into a sentence.
Best of luck in the contest...
John

 Comment Written 12-Nov-2013

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reply by the author on 12-Nov-2013

Thanks so much, John, for taking time to read my story. Your kind words and generous review are greatly appreciated!

Comment from Petriesan

Excellent

SPAG Notes:

overindulgence, earlier - no comma needed

Wow. Wrong guy. He got it worse than the wrong Lebowski.

Good job packing in as much as you did within the 150 word limit. It was fun to read.

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 12-Nov-2013

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reply by the author on 12-Nov-2013

Thanks for reading my story and your kind and generous review are greatly appreciated!