Little Poems
Viewing comments for Chapter 104 "Changing Clouds and Leaves"Small and Specialty Poems
9 total reviews
Comment from marycec
I really admire the technical expertise in this one. You have achieved the objectives of the form perfectly. The subject matter Is apt ,very reflective showing our interconnectedness with Nature.
reply by the author on 30-Oct-2013
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I really admire the technical expertise in this one. You have achieved the objectives of the form perfectly. The subject matter Is apt ,very reflective showing our interconnectedness with Nature.
Comment Written 30-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 30-Oct-2013
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Thank you Mary. Glad you liked it.
Comment from ravenblack
I have had days like these, you look up, get lost in the clouds, sense how everything is in flux, the only thing anchoring you to the ground the muted awareness of your name. I am not sure what you mean by dividing it into 3rds , but Don't really think I need to know. It gives it a mystic feel.
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2013
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I have had days like these, you look up, get lost in the clouds, sense how everything is in flux, the only thing anchoring you to the ground the muted awareness of your name. I am not sure what you mean by dividing it into 3rds , but Don't really think I need to know. It gives it a mystic feel.
Comment Written 28-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2013
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Thank you ravenblack. exactly.
Comment from robina1978
Lovely photo to complement this poem and thanks for expaining the form again. I loved the subject:changing clouds and leaves. That is how it is just now.
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2013
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Lovely photo to complement this poem and thanks for expaining the form again. I loved the subject:changing clouds and leaves. That is how it is just now.
Comment Written 28-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2013
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Thank you Ine
Comment from Sueellen11
My friend,,, you are so talented with these poetry styles,,, I am being shown so many different style in your writing,,, and you present great examples of there poetry from,, this is no exception,, excellent,,, beautifully worded,,, I love to imagine faces and images in the clouds,,, great write,,blessings,,,sueellen
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2013
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My friend,,, you are so talented with these poetry styles,,, I am being shown so many different style in your writing,,, and you present great examples of there poetry from,, this is no exception,, excellent,,, beautifully worded,,, I love to imagine faces and images in the clouds,,, great write,,blessings,,,sueellen
Comment Written 28-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2013
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Thank you sueellen for the review and the compliment
Comment from Dean Kuch
This was such a beautifully written poem, Mr. 'T', showing such a glowing love and appreciation for nature and all things under her azure blue skies.
I found the formatting, the Interlinked Rubiyat an interesting one. It really stands out, it's very different from most others.
Wonderfully done, and I appreciated the detailed author's notes on creating one, too!
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2013
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This was such a beautifully written poem, Mr. 'T', showing such a glowing love and appreciation for nature and all things under her azure blue skies.
I found the formatting, the Interlinked Rubiyat an interesting one. It really stands out, it's very different from most others.
Wonderfully done, and I appreciated the detailed author's notes on creating one, too!
Comment Written 28-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2013
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Thank you so much Dean, I too liked how it flows.
Comment from Shirley E Kennedy
Another unusual and very effective
poetry style.
Your mastery of this technique and
style is quite evident.
Nature surely is a great provider of lovely subject ideas and choices.
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2013
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Another unusual and very effective
poetry style.
Your mastery of this technique and
style is quite evident.
Nature surely is a great provider of lovely subject ideas and choices.
Comment Written 28-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2013
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Thank you Shirley. It certainly is for me. I am very pleased with all those stars. Glad you liked the poem and the format.
Comment from Preston McWhorter
Hi, Treischel,
This is AN interlocked rubiyat meeting all of the difficult requirements of that form as in your description. It has excellent iambic pentameter meter and good rhyme, figurative language and imagery. This is an exceptional poem fully deserving of six stars.
Preston
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2013
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Hi, Treischel,
This is AN interlocked rubiyat meeting all of the difficult requirements of that form as in your description. It has excellent iambic pentameter meter and good rhyme, figurative language and imagery. This is an exceptional poem fully deserving of six stars.
Preston
Comment Written 27-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2013
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Thank you Preston. You made my day! I appreciate getting those six stars.
Comment from rod007
I learned a lot from reading this poem and your commentary. I liked this quatrain the most.
"I watch the changing clouds go drifting by
In shifting pattern puffs that fill the sky.
So many floating thoughts that it achieves,
I could become lost and not even try. "
Keep up the great writing.
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2013
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I learned a lot from reading this poem and your commentary. I liked this quatrain the most.
"I watch the changing clouds go drifting by
In shifting pattern puffs that fill the sky.
So many floating thoughts that it achieves,
I could become lost and not even try. "
Keep up the great writing.
Comment Written 27-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2013
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Thank you rod.
Comment from STEPHEN A CARTER
I watch the changing clouds go DRIFTING by 'c' allits
In SHIFTING pattern puffs that fill the sky. 'p' "
A oneness with the squirrels and birds. LOVE 'oneness'
I need to separate it all in thirds. Good line
Because it's not divisible by two, " "
And wouldn't make much sense then afterwards.
And so I WATCH and stare into the blue,
Each moment CHANGING into something new.
And WATCH the CHANGING clouds go drifting by.
CHANGING USED 4X Suggest 'morphing, shifting,
WATCH " 4X Suggest 'view, gaze at, peruse etc.
Regards:
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2013
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I watch the changing clouds go DRIFTING by 'c' allits
In SHIFTING pattern puffs that fill the sky. 'p' "
A oneness with the squirrels and birds. LOVE 'oneness'
I need to separate it all in thirds. Good line
Because it's not divisible by two, " "
And wouldn't make much sense then afterwards.
And so I WATCH and stare into the blue,
Each moment CHANGING into something new.
And WATCH the CHANGING clouds go drifting by.
CHANGING USED 4X Suggest 'morphing, shifting,
WATCH " 4X Suggest 'view, gaze at, peruse etc.
Regards:
Comment Written 27-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2013
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Thank you Stephen I made some changes at your excellent suggestions.
