My Erroneous Journey
Viewing comments for Chapter 1 "My Erroneous Journey ~~ Part 1"how i came to join Fanstory
32 total reviews
Comment from Liz O'Neill
The opening stream of consciousness will draw the reader in to identify with the speaker's thoughts. You description invited the reader to viscerally share your experience. Your ending will bring the reader back.
reply by the author on 18-Jun-2023
  |
The opening stream of consciousness will draw the reader in to identify with the speaker's thoughts. You description invited the reader to viscerally share your experience. Your ending will bring the reader back.
Comment Written 17-Jun-2023
reply by the author on 18-Jun-2023
-
Hi Liz,
wow, I wrote and posted this story ten years ago.
To see you have dug it out of obscurity and reviewed it so graciously, warms my soul... thank you!
It actually allowed me to go back and read it again, just to refresh my memory of the story. Straight away, I see edits I would now do to tighten up the narrative.
Truly grateful for your time and effort Liz.
Kind regards,
James.
Comment from nancyjam
This is riveting. You tell the story well,
keeping the reader in suspense with your
vivid description of the scene.
How frightening for you.
I look forward to reading part two.
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
|
This is riveting. You tell the story well,
keeping the reader in suspense with your
vivid description of the scene.
How frightening for you.
I look forward to reading part two.
Comment Written 28-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2013
-
Hi Nancy J,
thank you so much for your encouraging review and the excellent rating. I am most appreciative of you going in to find this story, especially when there wasn't anything much on offer.
Kindest thoughts,
James xx
Comment from songbyrd
I'm so gald I read your story. If anyone on this site can relate, believe me I can. My husband and I got environmental poisoning several years ago. The same biological agent used to kill thousands in Asia. Now have severe multiple chemical sensitivities, can tolerate ZERO chemicals of any kind. Yes, we sometimes wonder why did this happen to me? We've lost everything twice and had to move 10 times since due to the way we have to live chemical free. The physical pain is often unbearable. We can, as you say, give up..or be a fighter and do all we can to help educate and bless others and try to keep a song in our hearts, despite the pain. God bless you. Keeping you in my prayers. You are an excellent writer!
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2013
 |
I'm so gald I read your story. If anyone on this site can relate, believe me I can. My husband and I got environmental poisoning several years ago. The same biological agent used to kill thousands in Asia. Now have severe multiple chemical sensitivities, can tolerate ZERO chemicals of any kind. Yes, we sometimes wonder why did this happen to me? We've lost everything twice and had to move 10 times since due to the way we have to live chemical free. The physical pain is often unbearable. We can, as you say, give up..or be a fighter and do all we can to help educate and bless others and try to keep a song in our hearts, despite the pain. God bless you. Keeping you in my prayers. You are an excellent writer!
Comment Written 19-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2013
-
Hi Songbyrd,
sounds like there's a good story in your poisoning... I say, may as well make it count in some way, and if it can help someone else avoid such pain and misery by doing so... Why not?
I know I would love to know what happened... I know the chemical sensitivities only too well... Just the slightest fragrance makes my tongue start to tingle and go numb... And cleaning products, can't go near them, so now I just use white vinegar to clean everything with.
My heart goes out to you and your husband... Life throws us some interesting, but horrible lessons, but I'm one of those who will try to make it positive in some way, no matter... Hope you and your hubby are doing the same.
This review, and your stars was indeed a surprise, and may I say a very pleasant one at that... No not your story but your reaction to mine... Thank you so much for your kind understanding... You make my heart sing!
Take care, and do think about writing about what you have been through, that's if you already haven't... Blessing's to you and your husband.
Kindest thoughts,
James xx
-
Hey, your story touched me. You're right and we've really tried to take tragedy and use it to help others. I think I wrote a couple of stories on here..one is about multiple chemical sensitivity and the other about toxic mold/ mycotoxin poisoning. Once you get a bad chemical exposure like you and we did, then about 85% of the time you develop multiple chemical sensitivity. Please be careful.. Glad to meet someone else who has similar illness which is so often misunderstood and ignored by many, tho it has an ICD9 code and is a physical disability with SSA, HUD and DOE, among others. If you get a chance try to read them, maybe something I wrote may help you. God bless you and indeed, keep writing.. You're very talented, my friend.
Comment from mermaids
I am in awe here,this is a hazardous profession you are in. I am looking forward to the next chapter to see what happens. I wish you well.
reply by the author on 14-Oct-2013
|
I am in awe here,this is a hazardous profession you are in. I am looking forward to the next chapter to see what happens. I wish you well.
Comment Written 12-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 14-Oct-2013
-
Hi Mermaids,
I should have know better, playing with chemicals is a dangerous thing when done carelessly... Won't be doing that again anytime soon, and that's a promise!
Thank you so much for the two reviews and ready the whole story.
You are appreciated!
Kindest thoughts,
James xx
Comment from dejohnsrld (Debbie)
James,
You write beautiful prose. It is amazing the things we have lived through and come out of it for the better. It has made us stronger, more caring and understanding people. I am so glad we both stumbled onto Fanstory, a virtual wonderland for writers. Very well written and I feel as though I know you a bit more. Take care, dear friend~Debbie xx
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2013
|
James,
You write beautiful prose. It is amazing the things we have lived through and come out of it for the better. It has made us stronger, more caring and understanding people. I am so glad we both stumbled onto Fanstory, a virtual wonderland for writers. Very well written and I feel as though I know you a bit more. Take care, dear friend~Debbie xx
Comment Written 12-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2013
-
Hi Debbie,
yeah, this explains how and why I came to be on f/s. Not in my wildest dreams would I have thought I would be here doing this.
But you are right, with every new ailment, comes more understanding or is it just acceptance? No matter it has definitely given us a better outlook towards our fellow human beings, and that can't be a bad thing... And even better than that, we have got a better understanding of ourselves and that is invaluable.
Thank you Debbie, I appreciate your time and effort for these reviews... A true friend!
Kindest thoughts,
James xx
Comment from sweetwoodjax
this is very well written, jumbo j, that is such a terrible thing to happen to you and the outcome of that on your body had to be terrible. therese asked me to step in and look at your profile. i remember reviewing you before.
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2013
|
this is very well written, jumbo j, that is such a terrible thing to happen to you and the outcome of that on your body had to be terrible. therese asked me to step in and look at your profile. i remember reviewing you before.
Comment Written 12-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 12-Oct-2013
-
Hi Sweet WJ,
yeah, Terry... What a special lady! I had a bit of trouble with part two not going out to my friend/fans in-boxes. So Terry single handedly set about get my story recognized... She has such motherly tendencies, what can I say?
I want to thank you so much for coming in through my profile page to review me... This is indeed a very special family her on f/s. A true giving community that surprises me at every turn, with it's caring and loving nature. How could you be anything than humble by these unselfish acts of kindness?
Kindest thoughts,
James xx
Comment from 9999pool
I am glad that my 'sister' Terry asked me to drop by to review this story (although I seldom review stories).
Within this captivating story is a lesson in life to be learnt.
We do not give up easily with the task in hand. When the fumes could have killed and maimed, the call of duty did not abandon our desire to get it right.
Yes, it could have been a fatal injury but having weighed the circumstances and the danger this accident posed to life, it had to be done or faced the prospects of a chlorine bomb which could endanger the neighbors especially the children.
The merit of the story is that it could very well be true with some fiction in it no doubt. The length we will go to to make things right is sometimes beyond our own comprehension and undertaking. But then again, what else is there to do? Wait for the bomb to explode? Under these excruciating circumstances, safety is of top priority but risking one's life may not be the only option.
Now more importantly, what is the next step after this accident? If this happens again, is there a safety net to prevent the explosion? In life, we do have accidents and make a lot of wrong decisions but the fact of this story is simple - are we prepared for another accident to happen again and this could happen to others attending to dozing chemicals for the swimming pool.
If by now, no measures have been taken to prevent the accident from occurring, then, we have not learnt anything in life.
If all of us consider this is just an unpredictable accident then we are all very wrong. Safety measures should have been put in place for such accidents but did we took them like did we improved on the mistakes we made in life? Two wrongs does not make a right as with life.
Chlorine is a very toxic and dangerous chemical - that's why we used it for drinking water to kill harmful bacteria and germs it contains.
The author had highlighted the pain and suffering in life - sometimes beyond our control and he is right.
But if things are within our control, did we heed the warning signs or did we went ahead and make the mistakes knowing full well the costs of suffering and pain it can do?
I have reviewed this story with a lesson in life that we can share and in the 'worst case scenario', can life's hazards (including love) be harnessed and put to full use for our benefit without destroying our hopes and dreams? Smiles.
Being a health and safety officer, I am fully aware of the consequences of handling dangerous chemicals and the only way to prevent accidents is to eliminate the hazard or at least a breathing mask with oxygen would have prevented self injury from toxic inhalation.
By now, i do hope all the safety gear are in place including testing the safe level of chlorine in the swimming pool water, etc.
A truly enjoyable and exciting story to read. Penned very well and full of drama. Should he tell the wife? No! Why make her worry as she had enough problems of her own. If she knew about this accident, what good will it benefit her except to worry every time the hubby goes out to attend the swimming pools again? Smiles.
Cheerio, great write, Ritchie. :))
Have a great week end and put up safety measures or consult a health and safety officer of the manufacturer if in doubt.
P.S. I used to work as a Plant manager in a concentrated sulphuric acid plant and next door was our sister company producing chlorine, smiles.
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2013
|
I am glad that my 'sister' Terry asked me to drop by to review this story (although I seldom review stories).
Within this captivating story is a lesson in life to be learnt.
We do not give up easily with the task in hand. When the fumes could have killed and maimed, the call of duty did not abandon our desire to get it right.
Yes, it could have been a fatal injury but having weighed the circumstances and the danger this accident posed to life, it had to be done or faced the prospects of a chlorine bomb which could endanger the neighbors especially the children.
The merit of the story is that it could very well be true with some fiction in it no doubt. The length we will go to to make things right is sometimes beyond our own comprehension and undertaking. But then again, what else is there to do? Wait for the bomb to explode? Under these excruciating circumstances, safety is of top priority but risking one's life may not be the only option.
Now more importantly, what is the next step after this accident? If this happens again, is there a safety net to prevent the explosion? In life, we do have accidents and make a lot of wrong decisions but the fact of this story is simple - are we prepared for another accident to happen again and this could happen to others attending to dozing chemicals for the swimming pool.
If by now, no measures have been taken to prevent the accident from occurring, then, we have not learnt anything in life.
If all of us consider this is just an unpredictable accident then we are all very wrong. Safety measures should have been put in place for such accidents but did we took them like did we improved on the mistakes we made in life? Two wrongs does not make a right as with life.
Chlorine is a very toxic and dangerous chemical - that's why we used it for drinking water to kill harmful bacteria and germs it contains.
The author had highlighted the pain and suffering in life - sometimes beyond our control and he is right.
But if things are within our control, did we heed the warning signs or did we went ahead and make the mistakes knowing full well the costs of suffering and pain it can do?
I have reviewed this story with a lesson in life that we can share and in the 'worst case scenario', can life's hazards (including love) be harnessed and put to full use for our benefit without destroying our hopes and dreams? Smiles.
Being a health and safety officer, I am fully aware of the consequences of handling dangerous chemicals and the only way to prevent accidents is to eliminate the hazard or at least a breathing mask with oxygen would have prevented self injury from toxic inhalation.
By now, i do hope all the safety gear are in place including testing the safe level of chlorine in the swimming pool water, etc.
A truly enjoyable and exciting story to read. Penned very well and full of drama. Should he tell the wife? No! Why make her worry as she had enough problems of her own. If she knew about this accident, what good will it benefit her except to worry every time the hubby goes out to attend the swimming pools again? Smiles.
Cheerio, great write, Ritchie. :))
Have a great week end and put up safety measures or consult a health and safety officer of the manufacturer if in doubt.
P.S. I used to work as a Plant manager in a concentrated sulphuric acid plant and next door was our sister company producing chlorine, smiles.
Comment Written 11-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2013
-
Hi Ritchie,
thank you for your comprehensive review and no there's is no fiction in this write, what you read is all true... The mistakes from not having your mind on the job at hand... And yes I should of had safety practices in place and or wore a mask for vapors... I can assure you I do now!
Thank you so much for coming in and reviewing me, I do appreciate your support... That Terry, is a gem, don't you think?
Have a great weekend, enjoy your family and friends!
Kindest thoughts,
James
-
Hi James,
I think you are going to be a great writer. If you are good at writing romantic story, do give it a try. Think of yourself as the hero you always wanted to be but somehow never got the chance. Now you are the son of a very rich tycoon, what will you do? How will you abuse your power on women, money and friends? What will you learn in the end for the only woman that ever meant anything to you and she nearly died trying to save you - how's thta for a story line. A bad guy turned good and all because of one woman he tried not to love in the beginning?
Well, that's my muse. If i could write stories, i would do it, smiles.
Cheerio, and sister Terry - well, she is a darling when it comes to sympathy and empathy for others - she knew only too well after what she had gone through in life. If you haven't read her poem about 'Fifteen years" or some title like that, do check her story out and it is a true story too. I admire her courage and strength, smiles.
Cheerio, have a beautiful weekend.
Best, Ritchie. :))
Comment from Gert sherwood
Hello Jumbo J
Now I can see why that tbacha58 (Terry) asked me to read your entry for the contest
I know one thing. I don't have anything to pick apart
a nerve wracking scene to read,
Done very well.
Gert
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2013
|
Hello Jumbo J
Now I can see why that tbacha58 (Terry) asked me to read your entry for the contest
I know one thing. I don't have anything to pick apart
a nerve wracking scene to read,
Done very well.
Gert
Comment Written 11-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2013
-
Hi Gert,
how kind of you for coming to read and review this on a recommendation from one beautiful lady... Thank you so much for your kind comments, they are most appreciated as is this fine review. Have a great weekend.
Kindest thoughts,
James xx
-
You are s welcome James
Gert
Comment from Jade Lawson
Good luck for this contest. I really liked the first paragraph. I can see myself in it. That scene with the hydrochloric acid was intense and agonizing. What a terrible situation! Your question at the end is hard to say. I wonder what you did. This was an excellent entry for this contest.
reply by the author on 10-Oct-2013
|
Good luck for this contest. I really liked the first paragraph. I can see myself in it. That scene with the hydrochloric acid was intense and agonizing. What a terrible situation! Your question at the end is hard to say. I wonder what you did. This was an excellent entry for this contest.
Comment Written 10-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 10-Oct-2013
-
Hi Angel,
thanks so much for the review on this one... Hope you catch up to the conclusion of the story... I don't know with the mess up with the messages not going out, if I will have the reviews required to even have a look-in, in the contest. But thanks anyway, it was a kind thought... I will miss you!
Kindest respect,
James xx
Comment from allborn66
That sounds like some pretty scary stuff. I was never good at chemistry, I try to avoid it whenever possible.
The story has a great voice. I like your introduction, and the drama in your tale.
Barbara
reply by the author on 09-Oct-2013
|
That sounds like some pretty scary stuff. I was never good at chemistry, I try to avoid it whenever possible.
The story has a great voice. I like your introduction, and the drama in your tale.
Barbara
Comment Written 09-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 09-Oct-2013
-
Hi Barbara,
thank you for the kind review and comments, most appreciated.
Kindest thoughts,
James xx
