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Viewing comments for Chapter 33 "***Sweet Surrender***"
My Self Biograpy

5 total reviews 
Comment from donkeyoatey
Excellent
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Surrender is often a strnger stance! the willow surrenders and bends before the wind, the moon seems to surrender as it changes, and the tide retreats..our view of time is too short my fine friend, to really understand surrender! Donkeyoatey

 Comment Written 26-Sep-2013


reply by the author on 27-Sep-2013
    So verry true!
    Thanks,
    24.
Comment from cinderbella
Excellent
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This sounds very sad and as if the narrator is in a lot of pain and despair.
Written well, you do have a few spelling mistakes but I am sure you will spot them yourself, mostly typos I think.
Good job! :) Sandra

 Comment Written 26-Sep-2013


reply by the author on 17-Oct-2013
    Thanks again!
    24...
Comment from CR Delport
Excellent
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This is a great piece of writing, and although I didn't follow all your poems up to know, this is well written and makes for a nice read.
"I make my way up thr sorrowed path of regrets -- the ???

 Comment Written 26-Sep-2013


reply by the author on 17-Oct-2013
    Thanks again!
    24..
Comment from tbacha58
Excellent
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Slowly, ever so slowly, my mind's neutrons return and
slowly the burn and it's pain...
Spurned and shaken heart return!"

My dear 24, what can I write to ease your pain, I feel with you, maybe this can help, suffering a tragedy is the worst ever that can happen to a human being. Your survival is a necessity, and you are writing them with a broken pen. May God stand by you my friend. We are here for each other. Bless u Terry

 Comment Written 25-Sep-2013


reply by the author on 17-Oct-2013
    And AGAIN!!!
    24...
    LOL!!!
Comment from SteveY
Excellent
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I don't know my friend. Sounds like a lot of rambling to me. Slow down and take your time maybe in order to state a message that is a little more clear to your readers. Just my humble opinion.

 Comment Written 25-Sep-2013


reply by the author on 25-Sep-2013

    Background
    This is going to be a fast write for the pain with
    what I know is immense.
    Completion date 2014 by Spring.
    !00= Poems, songs, and stories.
    By
    DR. Richard Edward Smrkovsky.
    Slam-Poet of Laureate
    and Writer in all venues.
    <><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>
    (.).(.).(.).(.).(.).(.).(.).(.).(.).(.)*

    As I watched my only son drift away into
    oblivion, I realized I'd Died...
    I'd died each and every time I cried...
    I'd died after I screamed His name never
    again to re-life consciousness again...
    ...
    "I cried for my hero, my friend, a gift
    that I must attend!
    I cried for my only son my soul-mate...
    I cried for my lost.
    As I slowly realized the horrid lost...
    ...
    "I lost my creation God, DAMN IT!
    Can't You feel my fuc**** *incineration?
    My random losses and extreme humiliation?
    My Heart, why does it burn so?
    Oh, way oh way does it cry?
    ...
    My Heart to collapsed as His but they
    resuscitated Him in the helicopter as my
    Heart melted and dissolved into some strange
    goo as the molten magma ripped ME...Into!!!
    Into a thing with no mind...
    Into a creature worse then Frankenstien...
    A monster in slowness coasting down into the
    pit of lost **foreverness!
    ...
    "Damn You!
    The Heart, after God's hands grabbed, the
    tension was immediately ascertained as You
    wrapped my Son in Your gently arms and rushed
    Him away...
    Forever...
    No more will there be a sunny day...
    For me. you see I don't even life here, I life
    with He...
    But His Heart again Ticked but not for long...
    ...
    "Red Light #1-
    Now what? Red Light #2-
    Taste the waste and spit it out for, My Son,
    now you too are learning what real life is all
    about! Said Christ.'
    ...
    "Don't hate me as I make you believe again, My
    child, My Loving Friend!
    Red Light #4-
    Open wide that shut door for it has been two,
    long, and, suffering of years and even though
    your wife Carolyn died also because she couldn't
    take it anymore, You have four more!"
    ...
    "Four more daughters who soon will create!
    Four more strong and beautiful daughters who now
    need you so isn't that GREAT? said God.
    Open that sordid door wide and make that waste a
    sweet and brilliant taste!
    Red Light #5-
    Now it is time for Me to re-create
    You and touch Me, climb inside the "Much of Me"
    and feed the starving of waste, teach the addicted
    and the those who have lost there faith!
    Much as You, Son.
    There is much work to be done.

    "In the year of 2003,{April 1st}, organs after
    organs veins and arteries from My Son's arms, legs,
    chest, and neck were harvested as if a garden from
    Christ to be delivered to those who are lucky, very
    sick, and nice!
    My 18 year old baby my *** "Buddy Friend" is this
    the end?
    This is a three part piece to be presented in three
    days.

    Part Two- "Buddy Friend's" Basketball Career.
    And Part Three- "God Will Touch Me!"

    "My First Poem written in less then three weeks after
    Jays Death on his computer, a gift from being severely
    hit but accidental on the head with a golf club about
    a year previously.

    "This poem was presented in Washington, DC. in 2005 at
    the Hilton on Connecticut Avenue in front of 60 fine poets
    {total there about 5,000.}

    I received a beautiful silver plated bowl in honor {a gift
    from my new Angel!}

    <><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>><><>

    "Buddy Friend."
    Copy write 2005 by "The International Society of Poets"
    Baltimore, Maryland.

    "I'm not here right now but I'm not far...
    It's a place close, not far like a Star...
    You'll feel this place, take a moment, you'll see
    and then you'll know just where I'll be!"
    Jason Richard Smrkovsky 11-05-1884 - )03-31-2003.
    R.I.P. Buddy Friend dad loves and miss's You each
    and every waking day.

    To learn more about "The Gift of Life" Philadelphia,
    Pennsylvania, call 1-800-DONORS-1 and ask for my friend
    Lara Morrejason.tti LSW. And tell here "Jay" sent yah!
    Thanks! 1
    Start... You'll feel this place, take a moment you'll
    see and then you'll know you just where I'll be!
    Jay...

    The book continues with BarrenDrainedIForeverRemainDisbarged. We will provide a link to it when you review this below.
    Author Notes
    The entire piece was written today August 9th, 2013
    at my house in New Jersey.
    Time Started $:00 Am. and finished at 4:25 AM.
    Eastern Standard Time.

    Special thanks goes out to Jesus Christ, Fan Story
    and Tom, Fan Art Review, and the artist
    "donkeyoatey