If The Jester Cried At Night
Viewing comments for Chapter 12 "Now and Beyond"A collection of favourite poems by mrgrunty.
11 total reviews
Comment from jammin john
Awesome, bro. How easy it is to look back and see the truth. When It's there in front of you, it's seldom recognized. That's why the old monday mornin quaterback is never wrong. If only we could read the future.
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Awesome, bro. How easy it is to look back and see the truth. When It's there in front of you, it's seldom recognized. That's why the old monday mornin quaterback is never wrong. If only we could read the future.
Comment Written 20-Jun-2005
Comment from ScarletAffliction
Like the radiating beauty
of a lifting morning ray,
as a person looks for chances
to begin again today.
"written for poetry readers and not dollar grabbers"! lol. I love that! I totally agree. I despise the notion that a high paying poem is a well written poem. Ridiculous. I often wait until my friends works aren't worth anything at all so that they know I enjoyed reviewing it for the pleasure of reviewing. (That...and I'm lazy. hee hee)
Fantastic poem, my friend. Keep that soulful searching writing going. It's a pleasure to read.
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Like the radiating beauty
of a lifting morning ray,
as a person looks for chances
to begin again today.
"written for poetry readers and not dollar grabbers"! lol. I love that! I totally agree. I despise the notion that a high paying poem is a well written poem. Ridiculous. I often wait until my friends works aren't worth anything at all so that they know I enjoyed reviewing it for the pleasure of reviewing. (That...and I'm lazy. hee hee)
Fantastic poem, my friend. Keep that soulful searching writing going. It's a pleasure to read.
Comment Written 11-Jun-2005
Comment from Shari_K
This is a beautiful poem that ends with some hope which is something I really need right now. It was a little lighter than you usually write, though I have been busy and haven't been here lately, it was nice to see something from you when I came on tonight.
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This is a beautiful poem that ends with some hope which is something I really need right now. It was a little lighter than you usually write, though I have been busy and haven't been here lately, it was nice to see something from you when I came on tonight.
Comment Written 10-Jun-2005
Comment from Lisloh
As a poem, this is excellent. The read is smooth, no bumps. The rhythm and rhyme are concise. The depth of emotion is evident. The intent of content is clear. Awesome work!
As a glimpse into your Soul, this is quite revealing. Gives the impression of a Life accumulated through trial and rewarded with wisdom:
"The life I'm in now different,
with the answers that I find." (I love that line)
"To set the mind on open ground,
is to let the spirits sink." (I understand that line)
"When looking back I spy the truth
of the love you took from me." ( I have experienced that line)
The last stanza appears to be where I am now. You have so touched me with this poem Sir. Thank you.
Take care & be safe
Lisloh
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As a poem, this is excellent. The read is smooth, no bumps. The rhythm and rhyme are concise. The depth of emotion is evident. The intent of content is clear. Awesome work!
As a glimpse into your Soul, this is quite revealing. Gives the impression of a Life accumulated through trial and rewarded with wisdom:
"The life I'm in now different,
with the answers that I find." (I love that line)
"To set the mind on open ground,
is to let the spirits sink." (I understand that line)
"When looking back I spy the truth
of the love you took from me." ( I have experienced that line)
The last stanza appears to be where I am now. You have so touched me with this poem Sir. Thank you.
Take care & be safe
Lisloh
Comment Written 09-Jun-2005
Comment from mfwilkie
Hi Mr. G, I like your words but I think you can give them more energy and imagery if you pared them a bit to fit the spine of the poem.
When I come upon a flower,
I see the sunshine in you;
a warmth that comes at morning
and brings a wave to wash the blue.
The life I'm in is different,now (or My life is a bit different, now)
or at least within my mind
and sunsets last forever
within the answers that I find.
Something like that, Mr. G.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
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Hi Mr. G, I like your words but I think you can give them more energy and imagery if you pared them a bit to fit the spine of the poem.
When I come upon a flower,
I see the sunshine in you;
a warmth that comes at morning
and brings a wave to wash the blue.
The life I'm in is different,now (or My life is a bit different, now)
or at least within my mind
and sunsets last forever
within the answers that I find.
Something like that, Mr. G.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 09-Jun-2005
Comment from Permelia
It is strange how we can be so trusting, and not see the signals until it is too late- that the person we love is being untrue - this verse really spoke to me. And it is good to see your poems up again!
The shadows harbour secrets,
now so obvious to see.
When looking back I spy the truth
of the love you took from me.
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It is strange how we can be so trusting, and not see the signals until it is too late- that the person we love is being untrue - this verse really spoke to me. And it is good to see your poems up again!
The shadows harbour secrets,
now so obvious to see.
When looking back I spy the truth
of the love you took from me.
Comment Written 09-Jun-2005
Comment from Zenbud
Okay, read it four times . . . I know art is subjective (and this is truly well done) but I can't seem to get past 'spirits sink' . . . when the mind is on open ground. Then again, I don't need to know. This spoke positively to me in its resignation of lonliness . . . Zen
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Okay, read it four times . . . I know art is subjective (and this is truly well done) but I can't seem to get past 'spirits sink' . . . when the mind is on open ground. Then again, I don't need to know. This spoke positively to me in its resignation of lonliness . . . Zen
Comment Written 09-Jun-2005
Comment from Hetty
Hello Mr. Grunty!!
This is rather lovely, soft images and lyrical lines and a universal message.
Content: Loads of strong imagery and the ending stanza sums up the piece very neatly.
Rhythm: The rhythm is consistent because the meterage is consistent.
Rhyming/.Alliteration: Alternative end stop rhyming and I could not see anywhere where the rhyming was predictable or weak in this piece.
The poem has a lot of alliteration which gives it that lyrical quality eg. "warmth, wave, wash"
Flow: The flow is good because of the consistent rhythm and reads with pace.
A couple of nits for you to ponder on:-
The life I'm in now different,
with the answers that I find.
(try "now differs with/from" or "now different to" as it is slightly better grammar)
"now so obvious to see" - delete "now" here as you have it in previous stanza and you don't really need it here.
Okay I know. I have read your comments on reading with as much feeling as writing and the feeling that I got from this was that it has been well crafted and some of the lines are really heartfelt. The whole read is very smooth.
hope this helps!
Hetty
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Hello Mr. Grunty!!
This is rather lovely, soft images and lyrical lines and a universal message.
Content: Loads of strong imagery and the ending stanza sums up the piece very neatly.
Rhythm: The rhythm is consistent because the meterage is consistent.
Rhyming/.Alliteration: Alternative end stop rhyming and I could not see anywhere where the rhyming was predictable or weak in this piece.
The poem has a lot of alliteration which gives it that lyrical quality eg. "warmth, wave, wash"
Flow: The flow is good because of the consistent rhythm and reads with pace.
A couple of nits for you to ponder on:-
The life I'm in now different,
with the answers that I find.
(try "now differs with/from" or "now different to" as it is slightly better grammar)
"now so obvious to see" - delete "now" here as you have it in previous stanza and you don't really need it here.
Okay I know. I have read your comments on reading with as much feeling as writing and the feeling that I got from this was that it has been well crafted and some of the lines are really heartfelt. The whole read is very smooth.
hope this helps!
Hetty
Comment Written 09-Jun-2005
Comment from SusanMichelle
I really liked this ...it is sad and very hopeful (at least to me!) at the same time. I liked the choice of words too. Sometimes your words / ideas are very complex in the best poetic way and each time I read them I find something I missed. I especially loved the opening verse. Great to read!
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I really liked this ...it is sad and very hopeful (at least to me!) at the same time. I liked the choice of words too. Sometimes your words / ideas are very complex in the best poetic way and each time I read them I find something I missed. I especially loved the opening verse. Great to read!
Comment Written 09-Jun-2005
Comment from amysfind
I enjoyed the flow, imagery and sentiment of this poem. The flow was soothing, the imagery vivid and beautiful and the sentiment left me with a bittersweet feeling. I especially liked the first stanza, it was very pretty. thanks for sharing
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I enjoyed the flow, imagery and sentiment of this poem. The flow was soothing, the imagery vivid and beautiful and the sentiment left me with a bittersweet feeling. I especially liked the first stanza, it was very pretty. thanks for sharing
Comment Written 09-Jun-2005
