Sammy's Prayer
A little boy isn't happy about his new baby brother.31 total reviews
Comment from w.j.debi
The voice of this piece is adorable and voices the child's concerns so clearly. The cadence and rhyme are well done. Great picture to enhance the message.
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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The voice of this piece is adorable and voices the child's concerns so clearly. The cadence and rhyme are well done. Great picture to enhance the message.
Comment Written 08-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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Thank you so much for the review and the nice comments on this.
Beth
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
Verrrry good, Beth. Touching story that many parents of multiple kids can relate to. The meter and rhyme are spot on as usual... a superb contest entry. :)
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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Verrrry good, Beth. Touching story that many parents of multiple kids can relate to. The meter and rhyme are spot on as usual... a superb contest entry. :)
Comment Written 08-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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Thank you Phyllis. I appreciate your comments. That is hign praise from a poet like you.
Beth
Comment from poeticpatchwork
I really like your poem! Its witty and endearing and sounds just like something a child would say! The rhymes and rhythm sound great! Have a blessed day!
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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I really like your poem! Its witty and endearing and sounds just like something a child would say! The rhymes and rhythm sound great! Have a blessed day!
Comment Written 08-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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Thank you so much for the great review on this little poem. I'm glad you like it.
Beth
Comment from Razz
So very cute.
Wonderfully expressed.
Imagery is wonderful.
Photo is award winning**********
This poem is a winner for me.
Great entry.
Good luck in contest.
Razz
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2013
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So very cute.
Wonderfully expressed.
Imagery is wonderful.
Photo is award winning**********
This poem is a winner for me.
Great entry.
Good luck in contest.
Razz
Comment Written 08-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2013
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Razz, thank you so much for the six star rating. I really appreciate you comments. I'm so glad you like it.
Beth
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You are so welcome, Beth.
Well deserved.
Razz
Comment from samandlancelot
Beth,
I enjoyed your little boy's prayer looking to exchange his little brother. Enjoyable rhymes and rhythm in this excellent poem from a child's point of view.
Patricia
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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Beth,
I enjoyed your little boy's prayer looking to exchange his little brother. Enjoyable rhymes and rhythm in this excellent poem from a child's point of view.
Patricia
Comment Written 08-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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Thank you Patricia. I'm so glad you enjoyed this poem. I appreciate your comments.
Beth
Comment from Senyai
Hi, Beth. This is delightful! Your cute poem is truly from a child's perspective and reminds me of how our 2 year old son felt when we brought his sister home from the hospital many years ago. Your choice of rhyme scheme, ABCB, fits nicely with the 8-7-8-7 syllable count. Best to you in the contest.
Foxey
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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Hi, Beth. This is delightful! Your cute poem is truly from a child's perspective and reminds me of how our 2 year old son felt when we brought his sister home from the hospital many years ago. Your choice of rhyme scheme, ABCB, fits nicely with the 8-7-8-7 syllable count. Best to you in the contest.
Foxey
Comment Written 08-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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Thank you so much for the review and comments. I really enjoyed reading them. I've known some children who had this problem. LOL
Beth
Comment from MizKat
Hi BethShelby,
This is a darling little poem for The Child's Perspective poetry contest. I love poetry about children . . . they're so sweet and cute.
I am a great-great-grandma to the sweetest little boy, who's the apple of my eye.
Blessings, Kat
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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Hi BethShelby,
This is a darling little poem for The Child's Perspective poetry contest. I love poetry about children . . . they're so sweet and cute.
I am a great-great-grandma to the sweetest little boy, who's the apple of my eye.
Blessings, Kat
Comment Written 08-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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Thank you so much Kat. I really appreciate your review and comments.
Beth
Comment from harmony13
An adorable contest entry! The author did a good job conveying a child's prayer to God. The poem was creative and thought provoking. The artwork was perfect and enhanced the read. Well done....
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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An adorable contest entry! The author did a good job conveying a child's prayer to God. The poem was creative and thought provoking. The artwork was perfect and enhanced the read. Well done....
Comment Written 08-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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THank you so much for the review and the encouraging comments. I really appreciate it.
Beth
Comment from JM daSilva
Yeah, I had the same problem as this kid, and my brother has caused me trouble all his life. He's still doing it.
I hope the kid doesn't have the same woes.
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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Yeah, I had the same problem as this kid, and my brother has caused me trouble all his life. He's still doing it.
I hope the kid doesn't have the same woes.
Comment Written 08-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2013
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Thank you so much for the review and comments. I'm sure if I'd had a younger sibling I would have reacted the same
Beth
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No doubt. lol
Comment from Brenda F. Ring
This is an utterly delightful poem! It flows very well and captures the voice of a child with very believable thoughts. Since the lines should be 8-7-8-7 syllable count, you might need to make a few changes though. Instead of "I am sure", you need to put "I'm". "Every time I talk to you" is really 8 syllables, when you need 7 in that line. You could change every to ev'ry and make it work. Then, the last line needs to be 7 syllables. "Please bless my mommy and dad." would work. Even though it deviates from the 8-7-8-7 pattern, I still like it a lot!
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2013
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This is an utterly delightful poem! It flows very well and captures the voice of a child with very believable thoughts. Since the lines should be 8-7-8-7 syllable count, you might need to make a few changes though. Instead of "I am sure", you need to put "I'm". "Every time I talk to you" is really 8 syllables, when you need 7 in that line. You could change every to ev'ry and make it work. Then, the last line needs to be 7 syllables. "Please bless my mommy and dad." would work. Even though it deviates from the 8-7-8-7 pattern, I still like it a lot!
Comment Written 08-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2013
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Thank you so much for the review and the great comments. I guess the problem is being from the South, I've always pronounced every as two syllables rather than three. You are correct. I'll have to make this little guy speak like I do by using ev'ry. I didn't see anything wrong with the last line. It does have seven. I used Mommy as a proper noun and my dad as a common noun since it has a 'my' in front of it. I'm glad you like it.
Beth
