Family
Viewing comments for Chapter 34 "Little Pirates"Personal poems
27 total reviews
Comment from cvcopac
I did that too. Then we discovered (or someone did) that inner-tubes was the way to go. Cute and clever verse and made me laugh in remembrance. Kenny
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2013
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I did that too. Then we discovered (or someone did) that inner-tubes was the way to go. Cute and clever verse and made me laugh in remembrance. Kenny
Comment Written 26-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2013
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Thank you Kenny. Yes, tubing is so much easier.
Comment from Roxanna Andrews
This is a very well told story, very fun rhyme and so well done. Did the picture or the poem come first. I always wonder what inspires people. Rox
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2013
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This is a very well told story, very fun rhyme and so well done. Did the picture or the poem come first. I always wonder what inspires people. Rox
Comment Written 25-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2013
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Thanks Roxanna. I wrote the poem, then searched for the picture. But often I'll go through my photographs and write a poem inspired by the picture. So, for me, it can go either way.
Comment from jgirlie152
A very delightful poem of your childhood and attempting to become pirates. Those were the best days, when you believe you can be whatever you choose. As children, my brothers and I were like you, always on an adventure, seldom succeeding, but lots of fun and excitement in trying.
Best regards, Joan
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2013
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A very delightful poem of your childhood and attempting to become pirates. Those were the best days, when you believe you can be whatever you choose. As children, my brothers and I were like you, always on an adventure, seldom succeeding, but lots of fun and excitement in trying.
Best regards, Joan
Comment Written 25-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2013
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Thank you Joan. Yes, it is such fun to remember back to those times.
Comment from Angel Debbie
What great imagary. I can picture my boys when they were young doing something like this! Nice story. Great picture to boot! I guess memories are best relived with our children in mind. Thanks for the great read!
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2013
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What great imagary. I can picture my boys when they were young doing something like this! Nice story. Great picture to boot! I guess memories are best relived with our children in mind. Thanks for the great read!
Comment Written 25-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2013
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Thank youAngelmDebbie. I really appreciate your comments and all those stars.
Comment from cheyennewy
Hi Treischel,
I love this story poem and I sense a grain of truth in it. My boys and their friends were always building forts and their imaginary wars kept them busy all the time. You have penned a good rhyme, the flow is smooth, Your word selections are descriptive and the theme is excellent. Well done and good luck in the contest...chey
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2013
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Hi Treischel,
I love this story poem and I sense a grain of truth in it. My boys and their friends were always building forts and their imaginary wars kept them busy all the time. You have penned a good rhyme, the flow is smooth, Your word selections are descriptive and the theme is excellent. Well done and good luck in the contest...chey
Comment Written 25-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2013
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Thank you Chey. Yes, there is some truth in it.
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I thought so!
Comment from Capricorn30
Fun achieved in creative fashion as young boys replicate actions of adventure as so well-expressed in a writing of childhood past-times.
A well-penned pirate theme utilized in fond memories of days gone by.
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2013
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Fun achieved in creative fashion as young boys replicate actions of adventure as so well-expressed in a writing of childhood past-times.
A well-penned pirate theme utilized in fond memories of days gone by.
Comment Written 25-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2013
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Thank you Caoricorn. It was fun to write.
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As poetry should be!!
Comment from Sararb
Such a delightful poem about childhood memories of building your own pirate ship. This would be a perfect poem for a children's book. I can remember as a child we used to play Tarzan in the woods near our home. It was so much fun trying to recreate Tarzan and Jane. Thanks for sharing. Sararb
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2013
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Such a delightful poem about childhood memories of building your own pirate ship. This would be a perfect poem for a children's book. I can remember as a child we used to play Tarzan in the woods near our home. It was so much fun trying to recreate Tarzan and Jane. Thanks for sharing. Sararb
Comment Written 25-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2013
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Thank you. So much Sara. Wow! Six stars, that's GREAT!
Comment from Gungalo
On the maiden trip
Of our pirate ship,
Pushed it in the drink,
As we watched it sink,
Floundering in the bay,
Heard my matey's(mateys) say.
As pirates, we Stink!
Heheh poor pirates. Their own ship sank. Must have been a big disappointment. eh Tom? Well the building of her kept you busy.
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2013
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On the maiden trip
Of our pirate ship,
Pushed it in the drink,
As we watched it sink,
Floundering in the bay,
Heard my matey's(mateys) say.
As pirates, we Stink!
Heheh poor pirates. Their own ship sank. Must have been a big disappointment. eh Tom? Well the building of her kept you busy.
Comment Written 25-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2013
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Thanks Gungalo. Yup! The activity with buddies and anticipation of adventure were the best part. Fixed it. Thanks.
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Smile guy.
Comment from Dean Kuch
Ha,ha, been there, done that!
This was a fun one, Mr. T. I could picture you all there, as young boys, tongues protruding slightly, faces of concentration all around as you worked diligently on your pirate ship. Then, with great anticipation, hauling it out to the water for it's maiden voyage...then, right to the bottom she goes, matey! Glub, glub...glub.
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2013
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Ha,ha, been there, done that!
This was a fun one, Mr. T. I could picture you all there, as young boys, tongues protruding slightly, faces of concentration all around as you worked diligently on your pirate ship. Then, with great anticipation, hauling it out to the water for it's maiden voyage...then, right to the bottom she goes, matey! Glub, glub...glub.
Comment Written 25-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2013
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Thank you Dean. Yup, that's about how it went. Hoping for a smile, happy with a laugh.
Comment from adewpearl
strong rhymes
good use of enjambment to keep the story flowing
love the comic aside about how the men weren't actually men LOL
excellent detail of the makeshift pirated craft
I'm laughing out loud at the sinking ship :-) Brooke
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2013
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strong rhymes
good use of enjambment to keep the story flowing
love the comic aside about how the men weren't actually men LOL
excellent detail of the makeshift pirated craft
I'm laughing out loud at the sinking ship :-) Brooke
Comment Written 25-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2013
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Thanks Brooke. I was hoping for at least a smile. Happy I got a whole laugh!
