Reviews from

All Those Puzzling Pieces

Viewing comments for Chapter 39 "Through My Open Door"
What makes a life? How do the pieces fit?

85 total reviews 
Comment from beccabootie123
Excellent
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well written and gives a feeling of comfort to the reader. like the picture and use of colors. formatted for easy reading. feel good poetry thats how I describe it. thank you

 Comment Written 02-Feb-2013


reply by the author on 02-Feb-2013
    feel good is good becca - thank you very much!
Comment from Val Crisson
Excellent
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Oh, you brought back so many fond memories of Hawaii. I lived on Ohau for two years, and my finest memories were of sunrises and sunsets. Beautiful poem - I could almost smell the plumeria

 Comment Written 02-Feb-2013


reply by the author on 02-Feb-2013
    Drop by any time, Val! :)Sharyn
Comment from Nebukadneser
Excellent
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Definitely the other side of brilliant! You paint such a beautiful picture with this poem, it takes my breath away to see the morning wakening up through your eyes. I could smell the the coffee with real cream and saw the birds in abandoned joyful flight.
Well done
you're a star
Cool bananas and warm regards
Nebukadneser

 Comment Written 02-Feb-2013


reply by the author on 02-Feb-2013
    thx so much bananas! :)
Comment from dmt1967
Excellent
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This is a good poem I love the easy way you say I leave my door open and invite us into your world I thought was epic thank you for sharing and good luck in the contest

 Comment Written 02-Feb-2013


reply by the author on 02-Feb-2013
    thx so much dmt! :)
Comment from poetic1988
Good
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I like the imagery throughout your poem.

cushy armchair

by rustling coconut palms

smelling yesterday's fresh-mown grass

drenching rain
admiring my spiked bromeliads


This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 02-Feb-2013


reply by the author on 02-Feb-2013
    "Aloha" p1988 - please do read attached review guidelines. If you're going to mark something as a '4', that is assuming something needs improvement or adjustmetn, and you are expected to state what that might be please. Your review has consisted of one line "I like the imagery throughout your poem" - the rest is simply copied from my poem. That, honestly, isn't much of a review, no?

    From the site FAQ page-
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    Please do not rate at a level that indicates you feel it needs revision or adjustments without sharing what those are; it is important for the author to know the reasoning behind the rating or it can be confusing. :)
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Comment from artemis53
Excellent
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Very beautiful, Sharyn. I can see the entire scene playing out in front of me and feel the comfort of that well-worn chair. "I leave my door open" is a telling line of inclusivity.

 Comment Written 02-Feb-2013


reply by the author on 02-Feb-2013
    You've got it Diane - thank you so much! :)S
Comment from TheWritingType
Excellent
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You use some really beautiful imagery. Sometimes it's a little too hyperbolic for my personal tastes, such as the first three lines dealing with the description of the arm chair. But on the whole, I find the poem very satisfying to read. It paint such a calm and peaceful picture of the morning with just this edge of vibrancy and excitement as the wild life moves about.

I especially liked the lines:
'they swoop in stomach-clenching
full throttled loop-the-loops'

Well done.

 Comment Written 02-Feb-2013


reply by the author on 02-Feb-2013
    hyperbole is exaggeration TWT - you really think I exaggerated the arm chair? hmmmm ... :)
reply by TheWritingType on 02-Feb-2013
    Oh I think it works alright! Think it was more me just overly noticing it rather than some stark flaw.
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2013
    :)
Comment from Jacq77
Excellent
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A thoroughly enjoyable poem which had me feeling as if I was curled up in your warm, oh-so-comfy, cushy armchair and was experiencing all this myself. I even smelt the coffee. :-)
A great read.

 Comment Written 02-Feb-2013


reply by the author on 02-Feb-2013
    Join me for coffee any morning Jacq! :)Sharyn
Comment from Enrique28
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

What a lovely verse! A beautiful stream of every day observations strongly to the fore with fine poetic sounds. I love the casual element of domesticity with which you begin..."...but oh-so-comfy cushy arm chair..." and how you end it in the same fashion with your carefully allocated cup of coffee, and your preference for real cream. Wonderful nature imagery throughout. Great job!!

 Comment Written 02-Feb-2013


reply by the author on 02-Feb-2013
    I'm delighted that you dropped by for coffee with me Enrique! And ESPECIALLY delighted that you brought that lovely SIX with you! thank you SO much!!!! ok - curiosity's killing me - where's the Wirrell???? :)Sharyn
reply by Enrique28 on 02-Feb-2013
    The Wirral is the name given to a little peninsula between two rivers. It's in England, near Liverpool.
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2013
    aaah! I figured it was in England - you have the most WONDERFUL names!
Comment from clbritch
Excellent
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Wow! What a beautiful poem. Your descriptions and imagery are super. It was so relaxing, warm and inviting. This is a wonderful free verse. I truly love your picture as it compliments your poem perfectly.

 Comment Written 02-Feb-2013


reply by the author on 02-Feb-2013
    thx so much cl! :)Sharyn