Reviews from

All Those Puzzling Pieces

Viewing comments for Chapter 18 "It's Time"
What makes a life? How do the pieces fit?

75 total reviews 
Comment from EMB
Excellent
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Well, dang, Sharyn. My mind is kind of going haywire with this because I'm think like this: He's wetting his lips to play the clarinet, which is really him "doing his thang" for her, presumably in a bedroom. Okay. Great. So tell me...what are the other two guys doing in the room? You know, the ones with the sax and trumpet? (Can Mr. Rogers say "kinky"?) LOL

His wetting of lips tells me HE hasn't played yet, but I don't think this piece went where it took me, if you know what I mean. :)

 Comment Written 12-Dec-2012


reply by the author on 12-Dec-2012
    goodness gracious me, where IS that naughty mind of yours taking you? Here's my sweet guy, simply about to play his clarinet - and here's this gorgeous hottie ... now where did you mind go that you didn't think it should go? :)))))) of COURSE it should go there!!!!
Comment from Thomas Raine
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This is extremely sensuous and just tantalizing with great imagery - I definitely got that film noir vibe while reading this, from a beautiful construction you painted with your words.

"Finally, I wet my lips, breathe in deep
and as my clarinet glows
you look up at me
in faint surprise
as my disguise is blown"

Indeed,

- TR

 Comment Written 12-Dec-2012


reply by the author on 12-Dec-2012
    Bless you TR!!! I'm delighted you got the vibe - this was such a fun write for me. And a double/triple whammy delighted "thank you" for a special SIX! Always so much appreciated!
    :) Sharyn
Comment from specialkk
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Fantastic:) I'm getting all sorts of inspiration from my fellow FanStorians on how to continue the love story between my two protagonists! I LOVE your writing: your flow, your rhythm, the natural sway of the words on the page ... in a word, BRILLIANT! Congrats on the contest win! Thanks for sharing! -KK:)

 Comment Written 11-Dec-2012


reply by the author on 11-Dec-2012
    Bless you, KK! I'm so delighted that you enjoyed my piece AND gave me one of your precious SIXES! YEAH!! :) SHARYN
Comment from Terror2s
Excellent
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Congratulations on the contest win; I can see why this one received so many votes. Your descriptions encompassed multiple senses, and your words created a very sensuous atmosphere. T2

 Comment Written 11-Dec-2012


reply by the author on 11-Dec-2012
    thx so much T2! :)Sharyn
Comment from missy98writer
Excellent
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Sharyn,
Becall: what a dame. Your passionate poem is deserving of its praises. You did a fantastic job writing this poem relate to jazz and a horn player about to get licky.
The art work is priceless.
Sensuality oozes down the Paige.
Your narrative is excellent.
You used very fine alliteration,
You also used greet metaphors.
I enjoyed your lines:
At last, you know,
your eyes meet mine and I expose
the music of my soul
for you and only you
I'll play the dark and folded valleys of your body
and take you soaring over white-capped peaks of fire"
I'm so happy you won, but I didn't get to review I've been sick.
I'd recommend your sultry poem to other reviewers.
Please have a Happy Holidays, my friend.
Melissa.

 Comment Written 11-Dec-2012


reply by the author on 11-Dec-2012
    wasn't she though? thx so much missy! :) Sharyn
Comment from fairy77
Excellent
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Wow!Bacall is indeed a godess.I loved this piece from the first word.Congrats on a contest winner!I enjoyed folded valleys and confetti of desire.Virtual six!beth fairy77.

 Comment Written 11-Dec-2012


reply by the author on 11-Dec-2012
    thx so much dear beth - and also for your virtual '6'!
    Blessings,
    Sharyn
Comment from J. Dark
Excellent
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Oh, I loved this, Sharyn and wish I could six you. I laughed at your author notes because Bogey and Bacall is exactly what I was thinking as I read this wonderful piece. I loved the alliteration and phrasing of "tawdry trumpet music" and great imagery you give the reader with "white-capped peaks of fire".

You have such a wonderfully original style and I was delighted to see that this was a contest winner. It is highly deserving - well done.

Kindest of regards,

Mrs D :-)

 Comment Written 11-Dec-2012


reply by the author on 11-Dec-2012
    thx so much Mrs D! I had fun writing this one! :)S
Comment from Curtis Hatch
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

The poem is beautifully penned and accompanied with a flow that passionately follows the musical enchantment of love. It is a spectacular example of poetic excellence, and I see why it won the Passionate Love in Black and White contest.

Godspeed,
Curtis

 Comment Written 11-Dec-2012


reply by the author on 11-Dec-2012
    Bless you, Curtis - how lovely to have one of your special SIXES!! :) Sharyn
Comment from GWHARGIS
Excellent
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I see why you won. This was a very sensual piece with music as the motivator. I liked the way you described each instrument. Sax as silky and sinful. The trumpet as muscular. It was enough to set the romance up as something naughty and yet meant to be. Nice job.

 Comment Written 11-Dec-2012


reply by the author on 11-Dec-2012
    then I've done my job, GW - yes? naughty & nice is where we're going ... :) thx so much! Sharyn
Comment from justatuna
Excellent
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Can't believe how good you are. This poem freaked me out. Incredible job. I don't have a 6 for you...sorry. This is more than a 6. Congratulations on your win...another one. Are you taking steroids?

 Comment Written 11-Dec-2012


reply by the author on 11-Dec-2012
    thx so much Rob ... just one of those weeks!!! :):):):)