Reviews from

Along the Jericho Road

Viewing comments for Chapter 26 "Inaji Moon, Pt. 1"
Murder Mystery

43 total reviews 
Comment from Max Edon
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I did not read the previous chapters, but I enjoyed reading this. I thought that it was exciting and interesting. It had a good pace to it.

 Comment Written 03-Dec-2012


reply by the author on 03-Dec-2012
    Hi, Max. Thank you for taking time to read my latest chapter. I appreciate your interest and support! Bev
reply by Max Edon on 03-Dec-2012
    You are welcome! (And my name is Bev, too.)
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2012
    Really?! I think I can remember that LOL!
Comment from Connie C
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

It sounds like maybe the sheriff is getting closer to getting this solved. I am so impressed, Bev, with how you have woven so much into this mystery. I'm curious--did you know the ending when you began to write this novel? I've heard that there are writers who know their ending and sometimes even begin writing the ending first. I like how you have all these characters who seem to be connected in one way or another. Great work, my friend. Of course, I wish I could give you a six for this very fine writing of yours, but FS won't let me for now. I saw not one single spag, but I was pretty engrossed in just reading the content.
Hugs,
Connie

 Comment Written 03-Dec-2012


reply by the author on 03-Dec-2012
    Dear Connie, thank you so very much for this truly lovely review! You always inspire me to keep going and reach even higher. I do have my ending in mind. But I could end up changing that if one of my characters tells me otherwise LOL.
    I really appreciate your words of support and generous rating. Excellence is something I strive for! Love ya, Bev
reply by Connie C on 03-Dec-2012
    If excellence is something that you are striving for, then you, my dear, are there!
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2012
    How sweet, Connie. Thank you, I'm humbled. Xxx Bev
Comment from Rob Caudle
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Hey, Bev, excellent writing here. You voice is growing more expressive with every chapter. I even noted some alliterative phrases which I always enjoy. Your added color has not slowed the pace or the tension. Really, Bev, I am impressed!!! Your story and your writing gets stronger with every chapter. The simultaneous page was a great bit as it really helped visualize the scene. All in all great piece of writing, and for my eyes at least, not a nit in sight ( notice the alliterative phrasing? I told you I like it}.

Rob

 Comment Written 03-Dec-2012


reply by the author on 03-Dec-2012
    Rob, you have really put a big old smile on my face. I've been out Christmas shopping so it was much needed LOL. Thank you for your words of encouragement. I like to think my desire and efforts to improve are noticed -- and thanks to you I feel very validated. You are so special, and your reviews are always so gracious and supportive. The six stars are lovely, my friend. Hope you'll post soon and give me a chance to do the same for you. Hugs, Bev
Comment from Selina Stambi
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I can't wait to find out what happens next!

Great dialogue, brisk, smooth, unforced pace.

An exciting read. Thank you.

 Comment Written 03-Dec-2012


reply by the author on 03-Dec-2012
    Thank you so much, Reachingforthestars. I really appreciate you reading the chapter and your generous review. Warm regards, Bev
Comment from Shirley McLain
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Excellent chapter, full of tension. Now I'm wondering if the letter will be in the safe and if it will help the investigations. Great job.

 Comment Written 03-Dec-2012


reply by the author on 03-Dec-2012
    Hi, Okiegal. Thank you for your exceptional review! I sure appreciate the support and interest. The letter is going to lead to something crucial down the road. Warmest regards, Bev
Comment from JW
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is a well written chapter - a very smooth read as the storyline progressed. For a reader, it would easily hold their interest.

With Stan dead, one wonders what is going to happen next.

Thanks for sharing this. JW

 Comment Written 03-Dec-2012


reply by the author on 03-Dec-2012
    Thanks so much, Jonathon. Lots of things circling the drain right now. It's much like real police work - at least I hope it is - bit by bit and inch by inch. Appreciate the support! Warmest regards, Bev
Comment from Patrick G Cox
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Hi Bev,

I'm hoping you're going to give the Sherif and his people a bit of a break now. Good gripping chapter, I liked the touch with the woman on the mobile and waving her hands around and not steering.

Patrick

 Comment Written 03-Dec-2012


reply by the author on 03-Dec-2012
    I hope so, too, Patrick LOL! Thanks for your faithful reading of my chapters and your generous support. I really appreciate it. Warm regards, Bev
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

It's so easy to pick-up from the
last posted chapter - you're such
a natural with your writing, drawing
the reader back in and holding them
fast....

at last I can give you a six, Bev - a great chapter.

I'm not sure what [all] is happening - the "all" seems redundant to me - or am I reading it wrong.

Margaret

 Comment Written 03-Dec-2012


reply by the author on 03-Dec-2012
    Hi, Margaret. I am really honored by your words of support for the chapter! And thank you so much for your very generous stars.

    The 'what all' is an American slang term. I keep needing to be reminded that there are folks from all over the world on this site and something like that might not be clear. I've chucked it - no need to confuse LOL.

    Warmest regards, Bev
Comment from Adri7enne
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Good layering of story to have Sherrif Oleson craving a drink to hide his inadequacies, like the leaves would hide the trees' imperfections.

Well done, dialogues, Bev. Moves the story forward so smoothly.

The letter now represents a glimmer of hope for the sheriff. A link he can follow and we all want to know what the letter says.

Good chapter, Bev. Leaves us wanting answers and feeling a bit frustrated that Stan died before Derek had a chance to speak to him. Next!

Couldn't find any spags, either. Well done!

 Comment Written 03-Dec-2012


reply by the author on 03-Dec-2012
    Hi, Adrienne. Thanks so very much for your very generous review. Your insights are so helpful and much appreciated, as well.

    It's interesting writing a police story that I hope mirrors real life. God knows I watch enough I.D. television LOL. So often police investigations take many twists and turns. So, I'm finding it a good challenge to keep the interest of a reader who only gets to see a chapter every few weeks. I'm sure you know exactly what I mean. It's great when I get such feedback as yours and can guage if I'm meeting that goal. Gracias! XX Bev
Comment from Joan E.
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

I liked your parallel between the "tree's imperfections" and the sheriff's "inadequacies, along with the "wisp of fog," "bird" and "boxers" similes. Your storytelling is suspenseful, and the addition of the possible incriminating letter in Stanley's safe adds to the intrigue. -Joan

 Comment Written 03-Dec-2012


reply by the author on 03-Dec-2012
    Joan, thank you so very much for this very supportive and generous review. It's especially nice to know you liked my light poetic touches LOL. Your support means so very much and I can't adequately thank you for that, my friend. Hugs, Bev
reply by Joan E. on 03-Dec-2012
    Yes, I always enjoy your the way your poetic devices weave their way into your prose. Cheers- Joan
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2012
    Thanks, Joan!