Don't Be a DisaSTAR
186 words61 total reviews
Comment from missy98writer
Poet,
You poem is cleverly written with colorful imagery painted by you funny pen.
The art work is priceless you used.
In your poem you used excellent alliteration and humor.
You used great rhyme and meter.
You used very good metaphors.
I enjoyed your last stanza:
Be a wise master
And read this faster...
There is no plaster
For a disaSTAR.
I'd recommend your delightful poem to other reviewers.
I wish you good luck in the contest with your comical poem,
Missy.
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2012
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Poet,
You poem is cleverly written with colorful imagery painted by you funny pen.
The art work is priceless you used.
In your poem you used excellent alliteration and humor.
You used great rhyme and meter.
You used very good metaphors.
I enjoyed your last stanza:
Be a wise master
And read this faster...
There is no plaster
For a disaSTAR.
I'd recommend your delightful poem to other reviewers.
I wish you good luck in the contest with your comical poem,
Missy.
Comment Written 06-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2012
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HI Missy! Thank you so much for your good and thoughtful review. ART is by me. Enjoy a great day, CG.
Comment from Earl of Oxford
Hi, CG
This is great fun and very wise advice to newcomers.
I smiled all the way through and the last verse was the piece de resistance - inspired 4 lines in particular.
Best wishes, Ray
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2012
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Hi, CG
This is great fun and very wise advice to newcomers.
I smiled all the way through and the last verse was the piece de resistance - inspired 4 lines in particular.
Best wishes, Ray
Comment Written 06-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2012
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Hi Ray, thank you for your good review. I'm glad it pleased you! ART by me... Do you need a portrait? LOL, just kidding. I hope Henry is keeping well.
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Wow, CG, you are an extremely talented and versatile artist - I really mean that.
Hey, I thought this WAS a 'portrait of me' in my personal attire when swanning around indoors. Hahah! x
Comment from MizKat
You did a wonderful job in your poem about writing. I really enjoyed reading it. What I'd like to know though, is where did you find my picture? ( ; Kat
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2012
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You did a wonderful job in your poem about writing. I really enjoyed reading it. What I'd like to know though, is where did you find my picture? ( ; Kat
Comment Written 06-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2012
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Ha-ha! All art is by me. Thank you for your good review.
Comment from jmdg1954
From the photo to the poem itself, rhyming scheme, cadence, its all there complying with the contest rules.
I enjoyed reading this as it depicted what we as writers or writer-wanna-be's go through while on the site. I enjoy being here and reading your piece. Thank you...
John
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2012
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From the photo to the poem itself, rhyming scheme, cadence, its all there complying with the contest rules.
I enjoyed reading this as it depicted what we as writers or writer-wanna-be's go through while on the site. I enjoy being here and reading your piece. Thank you...
John
Comment Written 06-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2012
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Thank your for your good review John.
Comment from Chris Tee
This poem titled "Don't Be a DisaSTAR" is an absolutely excellent summary of what happens here at fanstory. Great and entertaining poetry. Well done and good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2012
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This poem titled "Don't Be a DisaSTAR" is an absolutely excellent summary of what happens here at fanstory. Great and entertaining poetry. Well done and good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 06-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2012
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Thank you for your good review! Baie Dankie.
Comment from candi lester
I thought this was very cute you did well on the wording of it good luck on the contest
Candi Lester
Soon to be known as
SWEETNESS JOLEEN WINTERS
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2012
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I thought this was very cute you did well on the wording of it good luck on the contest
Candi Lester
Soon to be known as
SWEETNESS JOLEEN WINTERS
Comment Written 06-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2012
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Thank you for your good review.
Comment from rama devi
Playful and fun - very fanstorian in content! LOL Good bouncy beat and whimsical tone. Fine rhyming. The flow is good except for two spots where the colons make it a bit choppy:
1
The next thing to do:
Is type a review.
2
The seeds you sow here
Should be: to bring cheer.
I suggest removing the colons.
:-)
Claws and wars does not really rhyme (at least not in USA diction - but it just slides by as a slant rhyme. good pun on star wars and disaSTAR too.
Creative and expressive write.
Two suggestions:
If you score too low(,)
You might make a foe.
If you cause trouble(,)
Undo the muddle.
Meets contest criteria.
Good luck.
Warmly, rd
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2012
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Playful and fun - very fanstorian in content! LOL Good bouncy beat and whimsical tone. Fine rhyming. The flow is good except for two spots where the colons make it a bit choppy:
1
The next thing to do:
Is type a review.
2
The seeds you sow here
Should be: to bring cheer.
I suggest removing the colons.
:-)
Claws and wars does not really rhyme (at least not in USA diction - but it just slides by as a slant rhyme. good pun on star wars and disaSTAR too.
Creative and expressive write.
Two suggestions:
If you score too low(,)
You might make a foe.
If you cause trouble(,)
Undo the muddle.
Meets contest criteria.
Good luck.
Warmly, rd
Comment Written 06-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2012
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Thank you for your good review Rama, I'll remove them.
Comment from Bindu Saxena
Humor,wit,intelligence,truth unfolded,expressions and advice:
These all go to give you a five. :)
Hope you call me a wise master
I read it faster...
I hope I have not proved a disaster.
Fun poem. Good luck!
The art work is equally hilarious!
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2012
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Humor,wit,intelligence,truth unfolded,expressions and advice:
These all go to give you a five. :)
Hope you call me a wise master
I read it faster...
I hope I have not proved a disaster.
Fun poem. Good luck!
The art work is equally hilarious!
Comment Written 06-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2012
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Thank you for your good review Bindu.
Comment from EMB
Hahahahahaha! This should be our Pledge of Allegiance or something! This was great. I loved the rhyming and the tempo. That part was great. But what steals the show is the wonderful "advice" you provide for all the members.
I hope I find this weeks later. I'd love to see how many "clowns" read this. LOL
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2012
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Hahahahahaha! This should be our Pledge of Allegiance or something! This was great. I loved the rhyming and the tempo. That part was great. But what steals the show is the wonderful "advice" you provide for all the members.
I hope I find this weeks later. I'd love to see how many "clowns" read this. LOL
Comment Written 06-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2012
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Thanks Edward for a great review!
Comment from mruss1
I really loved this found it both humoruos with so many twists of the truth. writing here can at times seems a slippery slope. Unlike many i have a vision and that trumps all else. Also I write from my heart which is kind of easy seeing I wear it on my sleeve:) It doesn't have far to go to make it to the pen. I think above all else you have to be true to yourself. If you aren't how can you expect anyone else to believe you? I wish i could give you the six that this deserves it is very well written:) I found it to be a enjoyable read with many bits of wisdom buried within the verse. Great job! Have a great night and take care......Mark
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2012
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I really loved this found it both humoruos with so many twists of the truth. writing here can at times seems a slippery slope. Unlike many i have a vision and that trumps all else. Also I write from my heart which is kind of easy seeing I wear it on my sleeve:) It doesn't have far to go to make it to the pen. I think above all else you have to be true to yourself. If you aren't how can you expect anyone else to believe you? I wish i could give you the six that this deserves it is very well written:) I found it to be a enjoyable read with many bits of wisdom buried within the verse. Great job! Have a great night and take care......Mark
Comment Written 06-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 06-Oct-2012
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Thank you Mark for your good review! It's all too true!
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You are always welcome:) The truth of it was the appeal. I honestly enjoyed reading this piece. A great poem is one where you can find parts of yourself inside the verse. I was able to do this with your piece.Sometimes truth is much stranger than fiction:) Mark
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Thanks Mark.
