The Tale of Ichabod Crane
A Halloween, almost quatrain.23 total reviews
Comment from thecoe
well done. The rhymes work and it is a good presentation of the story. You did well to maintain the focus of the cadence as well as the story. good job
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2012
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well done. The rhymes work and it is a good presentation of the story. You did well to maintain the focus of the cadence as well as the story. good job
Comment Written 25-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2012
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Good Morning and welcome to FS. I appreciate your taking the time to read and review my work. I also appreciate your notice,and therefore understanding,of the importance of the cadence. If you ever fall under my reviewer's pen, you will find that I am an unrepentant rhymer-true rhymes, no half or near rhymes--and a stickler about consistent rhythm. Since I joined this crazy bunch, I have even tried free verse and it is fun but feels a bit like cheating. I have always had the words. It is pushing and prodding them into highly structured verse that gives me joy. But I do appreciate the art of free form. I'm about to jump over to your page and see what is hiding there. Again, thank you for the fun stars.
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you are welcome. I am a bit different than you in that I am not much of a rhymer in my poetry as I have difficulty making it not feel forced just for rhymes sake. I appreciate that you are dedicated to excellence in your work and look forward to reading more of your work and look forward to hearing your thoughts on mine.
Comment from nancy_e_davis
That's okay with me. It is interesting in any event.
You told the story well and it is hard to tell a story in a strict format. I say well done Nancy
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2012
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That's okay with me. It is interesting in any event.
You told the story well and it is hard to tell a story in a strict format. I say well done Nancy
Comment Written 24-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2012
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Thank you for taking the time to read and review my work. I appreciate the stars too.
Comment from Dodey
A fantastic story/poem. Your chosen words and wonderful rhyme make for easy reading..The imagery is clear and the headless horseman made me shudder lol.. Eerie... Now what did' happen to Mr.Crane..Yikes..Great layout with a picture perfect to content....I read it though without a falter..Bravo my friend on a fine work..Kind Regards to you...Dee
reply by the author on 24-Oct-2012
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A fantastic story/poem. Your chosen words and wonderful rhyme make for easy reading..The imagery is clear and the headless horseman made me shudder lol.. Eerie... Now what did' happen to Mr.Crane..Yikes..Great layout with a picture perfect to content....I read it though without a falter..Bravo my friend on a fine work..Kind Regards to you...Dee
Comment Written 24-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 24-Oct-2012
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Thank you so much for taking the time to read and review my words. I have always loved this one and it was great fun to stuff it into verse. So, how do you like the new form with the shortened final line in each stanza? A bit of an experiment and any feedback is appreciated. Thanks for the stars too.
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My pleasure my friend..I loved the shortened lines ..Gave a nice rhythm to the work and for the category they were perfect..adding to the drama of it all by the sudden ending. Also giving this reader a second to regulate her breathing till the next quatrain..lol.. I Think the shorten lines added to the work for sure..Kind Regards to you..Dee
Comment from misscookie
Just looking at the artwork it gave me chills.
I thank you for your poem was not only scary but educational, for I forgot how this tale came about.
Thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 24-Oct-2012
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Just looking at the artwork it gave me chills.
I thank you for your poem was not only scary but educational, for I forgot how this tale came about.
Thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 24-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 24-Oct-2012
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Thank you misscookie for taking the time to read and review my story. It has always been a favorite of mine and it was really fun to scrunch it into verse. I'd love to know what you think of the new form with the short, final line in each stanza.
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I'm sorry I'm not a scholar of this art th to give you pro or con. I'm sure if you ask other write more imform than I they will be honest and tell you.
All I can say, I enjoyed the read very much.
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Thank you. But it is just how it makes you feel. All the scholars in the world with all their fine rules and ideas can't change that. It makes me glad that you enjoyed it.
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Your wel;come and keep on writing my friend.
Comment from dmt1967
This story has never been told so well very well written about the headless horseman I love it very well planned I love the picture as well thank you for sharing
reply by the author on 24-Oct-2012
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This story has never been told so well very well written about the headless horseman I love it very well planned I love the picture as well thank you for sharing
Comment Written 24-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 24-Oct-2012
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Thank you for taking the time to read and review my words. This has always been a favorite story of mine and it was fun to try and scrunch it into verse. This is a new form I'm trying out and I would love your comments if you have any feelings about the shortened fourth line.
And thank you for the stars too.
Comment from LadyCosgrove
Good story telling and creepy too. A touch off horror, a slice of fear and the aroma of death. Perfect for Halloween
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reply by the author on 24-Oct-2012
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Good story telling and creepy too. A touch off horror, a slice of fear and the aroma of death. Perfect for Halloween
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Comment Written 24-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 24-Oct-2012
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Thank you so much for the read and review. This has always been one of my favorite stories and it was fun to scrunch it into verse. The shortened fourth line is a new form I'm working with. I call it tetrabreve. I've got a contest underway if you are interested. I have to say I liked your wording of the review enough to give it stars too.
Comment from mizzkris20
What an awesome Halloween tale. Awesome!
Her lover stewed in jealous ire.
But how to hurt the man, unseen?
With wicked smile, he turned his thoughts
to Halloween.
reply by the author on 24-Oct-2012
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What an awesome Halloween tale. Awesome!
Her lover stewed in jealous ire.
But how to hurt the man, unseen?
With wicked smile, he turned his thoughts
to Halloween.
Comment Written 24-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 24-Oct-2012
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Welcome to FanStory and thank you for the read and review. This has always been one of my favorite stories and it was fun to scrunch it into verse. The shortened fourth line is a new form I'm working with. I call it tetrabreve. Got a contest underway if you are interested. I don't know if you have jumped into that pool yet, but I happen to be very competitive, so I think it is great fun. Thank you for the stars too.
Comment from Tina McKala
Very well told story, the horror ambiance and feeling built up to the climax, the structure was great, I believe it added a lot to the poem (the 4th short line mainly)
reply by the author on 24-Oct-2012
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Very well told story, the horror ambiance and feeling built up to the climax, the structure was great, I believe it added a lot to the poem (the 4th short line mainly)
Comment Written 23-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 24-Oct-2012
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Hello Tina. Thank you so much for the read and review. This has always been one of my favorite stories and it was fun to scrunch it into verse. The shortened fourth line is a new form I'm working with. I call it tetrabreve. Got a contest underway if you are interested.
Comment from Nanette Mary
Hullo Rosehill ...
Your Hollowe'en story is well told in this poem and it is smooth and easy to read.
There is one small query to raise ...
* You have - His evil's, trapped within these bounds.
You do not need a comma after evil's, ... by which, I presume you mean - His evil is trapped ....
Thank you for sharing this with us.
Love from ... Nanette Mary.
reply by the author on 23-Oct-2012
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Hullo Rosehill ...
Your Hollowe'en story is well told in this poem and it is smooth and easy to read.
There is one small query to raise ...
* You have - His evil's, trapped within these bounds.
You do not need a comma after evil's, ... by which, I presume you mean - His evil is trapped ....
Thank you for sharing this with us.
Love from ... Nanette Mary.
Comment Written 23-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 23-Oct-2012
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Hello Nanette Mary, Thank you for taking the time to review my piece. I forgot to drop the comma when I changed the previous line. Thank you for pointing that out. I am testing this form and appreciate any and all feedback on the abbreviated fourth line.
Comment from justatuna
This was an excellent write. More of a story. I like the way you shortened the final lines. Changed the mood. Flowed very well and definitely got me involved. Great job.
reply by the author on 23-Oct-2012
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This was an excellent write. More of a story. I like the way you shortened the final lines. Changed the mood. Flowed very well and definitely got me involved. Great job.
Comment Written 23-Oct-2012
reply by the author on 23-Oct-2012
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Thanks so much for taking the time to review my words. This is a new format I am trying out and I really appreciate the feedback.
