All Those Puzzling Pieces
Viewing comments for Chapter 51 "We'll Take Two!"What makes a life? How do the pieces fit?
78 total reviews
Comment from Mishelly
This poem is as gloriously rich and warm as the topic. The words flow naturally, and have a great rhythm. I'm sure everyone who reads this would also agree with your sentiment. I certainly know my moods are better when the weather is warmer.
reply by the author on 04-Sep-2012
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This poem is as gloriously rich and warm as the topic. The words flow naturally, and have a great rhythm. I'm sure everyone who reads this would also agree with your sentiment. I certainly know my moods are better when the weather is warmer.
Comment Written 03-Sep-2012
reply by the author on 04-Sep-2012
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I second that! thank you so much for enjoying the extra warm with me Mishelly! :) Sharyn
Comment from Lynar
I enjoyed how the repeating line of 'One Summer's gone' left a nice impression in the first stanza upon my mind. It didn't let me forget how wonderful the scene was in Summer, right down to the last line in fourth stanza. Great tricky emphasis done extremely well.
One could easily relate to the turquoise blue sea to continue in the environment that is right for lovers. No negative comments. Exceptional.
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2012
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I enjoyed how the repeating line of 'One Summer's gone' left a nice impression in the first stanza upon my mind. It didn't let me forget how wonderful the scene was in Summer, right down to the last line in fourth stanza. Great tricky emphasis done extremely well.
One could easily relate to the turquoise blue sea to continue in the environment that is right for lovers. No negative comments. Exceptional.
Comment Written 03-Sep-2012
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2012
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and a big double thank you my dear!
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You're very welcome.
Comment from vfbryant
I don't know how people like you come up with poems that fit these crazy forms (pantoum, quatern, etc.) but you have done a great job. I really like the easy entertaining flow of the poem, and the repeated line. It's also a playful poem, and that plus the layout of it makes it very enjoyable. Great piece! :)
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2012
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I don't know how people like you come up with poems that fit these crazy forms (pantoum, quatern, etc.) but you have done a great job. I really like the easy entertaining flow of the poem, and the repeated line. It's also a playful poem, and that plus the layout of it makes it very enjoyable. Great piece! :)
Comment Written 03-Sep-2012
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2012
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I think I rather enjoy the meditation of taking these crazy forms and then finding something that is different from what would be expected vf - otherwise, frankly, they'd drive me nuts because many of them are so damned dull! :) bless you for reviewing!
Comment from jaydub99
A very enjoyable read. I liked the tone it is light and fun. It evokes the joy of summer and the carefree attitude that is often a part of it. Your form is tight and you have weaved the descending line well. "Lets softly dance on the sun splashed shore" is my favorite line in the piece. Very good effort. Good luck on the contest.
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2012
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A very enjoyable read. I liked the tone it is light and fun. It evokes the joy of summer and the carefree attitude that is often a part of it. Your form is tight and you have weaved the descending line well. "Lets softly dance on the sun splashed shore" is my favorite line in the piece. Very good effort. Good luck on the contest.
Comment Written 03-Sep-2012
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2012
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thank you so much Jay!
Comment from justatuna
I recognize this writing. Always wonderful to read. This was perfect form. I'm no expert, but I didn't see anything wrong. Excellent message and perfect flow. Even with a difficult style. Well done. Best of luck.
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2012
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I recognize this writing. Always wonderful to read. This was perfect form. I'm no expert, but I didn't see anything wrong. Excellent message and perfect flow. Even with a difficult style. Well done. Best of luck.
Comment Written 03-Sep-2012
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2012
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aaaah you did, did you? thx Tuna!
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I think I did. If not, doesn't matter. Great job. You got my vote.
Comment from MissMerri
I really love the idea of taking another summer when the first one ends. This is so clever and beautifully written and presented. I think I'm going to fly south too. This painted such a tempting picture.
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2012
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I really love the idea of taking another summer when the first one ends. This is so clever and beautifully written and presented. I think I'm going to fly south too. This painted such a tempting picture.
Comment Written 03-Sep-2012
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2012
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thx Miss M. - glad you enjoyed!
Comment from fayesh
You did a nice job with this quatern. Your images are vivid and the flow of your lines is well done. I would, however, remove the commas from the second and eighth lines. There is no need for commas there.
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2012
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You did a nice job with this quatern. Your images are vivid and the flow of your lines is well done. I would, however, remove the commas from the second and eighth lines. There is no need for commas there.
Comment Written 03-Sep-2012
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2012
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thx Fayest! yes, I wrestled with those silly commas too - I think I'll ditch them! :)
Comment from Mary Ann MCPhedran
A good write with very well presentation. It has a nice picture which blends well with the script. No need for improvement. Thanks for sharing with me. Mary
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2012
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A good write with very well presentation. It has a nice picture which blends well with the script. No need for improvement. Thanks for sharing with me. Mary
Comment Written 03-Sep-2012
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2012
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thx so much mary Ann!
Comment from Oldsteamer
I like the idea of taking two summers.
Now days its a dream that can be turned to reality.
The form of your quatern has great form.
Your topic is perfect on this labor day.
Regards,
- R -
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2012
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I like the idea of taking two summers.
Now days its a dream that can be turned to reality.
The form of your quatern has great form.
Your topic is perfect on this labor day.
Regards,
- R -
Comment Written 03-Sep-2012
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2012
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thx so much Ray!
Comment from MikoAmaya
lol Ahh, if only Winter could be replaced by a second Summer...I'd miss the snow, but definitely not the cold. Great job with this form and thanks for sharing. :)
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2012
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lol Ahh, if only Winter could be replaced by a second Summer...I'd miss the snow, but definitely not the cold. Great job with this form and thanks for sharing. :)
Comment Written 03-Sep-2012
reply by the author on 03-Sep-2012
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thx Miko!
