To a son of God
Viewing comments for Chapter 1 "I am Providence ...!"Metre ... Freeverse & Quatrain
92 total reviews
Comment from A. Willow Bends
Excellent job with this one. The repetitive line creates a pounding reminder and makes this piece very strong. You have done a wonderful job with this, both with the providence line and remember me? Very strong and creatively powerful. Great job!
Wendy
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2020
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Excellent job with this one. The repetitive line creates a pounding reminder and makes this piece very strong. You have done a wonderful job with this, both with the providence line and remember me? Very strong and creatively powerful. Great job!
Wendy
Comment Written 07-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2020
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Thank you I very much appreciate the understanding and the acceptance of the form and its power ...
Comment from Patty Palmer
I find your poem interesting, once I took the time to read the review that you suggested. The free verse felt comfortable, which is saying something for you because I am not a big fan of it. But, for this poem, I don't see where a bunch of rhyming words would do it any justice. Great work!
Patty
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2020
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I find your poem interesting, once I took the time to read the review that you suggested. The free verse felt comfortable, which is saying something for you because I am not a big fan of it. But, for this poem, I don't see where a bunch of rhyming words would do it any justice. Great work!
Patty
Comment Written 06-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2020
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Excellent ... much appreciated ... the free verse works well in this because it uses the emphasis rather than the rhyme like you suggest. It has a poignant feel with a quizzical two line understanding in the middle that catches the impetuous of the thoughts of remember me's reasoning ... I thought it was well constructed and carried some weight. Glad you enjoyed.
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you're very welcome!
Patty
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anytime ...
Comment from Gypsymooncat
I think your use of "I, I am Providence" and repetition of "Remember me?" gave this poem a depth of interest it may otherwise have lacked. At first I thought "oh no, this will be jarring" and I'm happy to say, I was proved wrong.
I very much enjoyed this spiritual piece of yours, for its message as well as for its structure. Well said, well done!
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2020
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I think your use of "I, I am Providence" and repetition of "Remember me?" gave this poem a depth of interest it may otherwise have lacked. At first I thought "oh no, this will be jarring" and I'm happy to say, I was proved wrong.
I very much enjoyed this spiritual piece of yours, for its message as well as for its structure. Well said, well done!
Comment Written 06-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2020
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Excellent much appreciated glad you could entertain yourself with this as it was a small masterpiece to which I have endeared myself to. It runs smoothly and your right the whole idea to make it work was the construction of the repetition and the all important "I" as it makes for a better question in the readers mind who is this "I" that he talks of and "why" remember him or her in this case Hitler.
Comment from Benny Beeharry
Hi the words are very strong in this write and they try to convert the faith that is fundamental to all beliefs. But these words in the Revelation are not easy to decipher, least of all to express in words. Only deep meditation could reach the depth of them.
God bless
Benny Beeharry
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2020
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Hi the words are very strong in this write and they try to convert the faith that is fundamental to all beliefs. But these words in the Revelation are not easy to decipher, least of all to express in words. Only deep meditation could reach the depth of them.
God bless
Benny Beeharry
Comment Written 06-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2020
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Well I think this man who meditated on them got their meaning and in a strange way he was right ... it was just a pity he caused so much hurt and grief causing mass destruction and devastation not to mention single handedly wiping out a whole race of people ...
Hitler actually developed his own religion bringing with it the new establishment of the true new world order also increasing the birth of the arian race to systematically control the whole evolution of his own understanding of what a God should really be like. He alone understood the contemplation of world domination in a unity of perfect blood and with it he saw the only way forward was to eradicate the old world purging and purifying just like the refiner with his gold.
Comment from Diana L Crawford
This is quite a powerful poem and a very thought provoking piece! I love your inspiration comes from Revelations! I also love how you structured this so as to bring emphasis on certain words! thanks for sharing xoxo
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2020
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This is quite a powerful poem and a very thought provoking piece! I love your inspiration comes from Revelations! I also love how you structured this so as to bring emphasis on certain words! thanks for sharing xoxo
Comment Written 06-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2020
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Excellent you have a delightful and pertinent understanding which brings much pleasure to an otherwise withered root out of dry ground. You have excelled in understanding the secret that in free-verse not everything is as it seems ...
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absolutely! my pleasure to read! xoxo
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anytime ...
Comment from rspoet
Hello Bicpen,
An interesting, well-written free verse poem.
There are many throughout history who claimed to be providence or thought they were providence. And hordes desperately followed.
The list is long and each was no more than ash and dust, but left grief in their wake.
Where do we even start? Many are not even known. Those who burned "witches" or held inquisitions.
A long list:
of Caesars, Attila, Khan
Kings (and queens)
Stalin and Hitler
But each was temporary and temporal.
Enjoyed your poem
Robert
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2020
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Hello Bicpen,
An interesting, well-written free verse poem.
There are many throughout history who claimed to be providence or thought they were providence. And hordes desperately followed.
The list is long and each was no more than ash and dust, but left grief in their wake.
Where do we even start? Many are not even known. Those who burned "witches" or held inquisitions.
A long list:
of Caesars, Attila, Khan
Kings (and queens)
Stalin and Hitler
But each was temporary and temporal.
Enjoyed your poem
Robert
Comment Written 06-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2020
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Excellent ... a true gift of wisdom that has reached my words with such decadence and high authority you have given an astute and pleasing sacrifice of comment which deliberates the reason of consequence and you are right ... in time ... and as history shows they all have an end however the real question asked of ourselves is do we really ever learn from it because as the world turns revolving around again and again so unfortunately does the origin of evil swirling on its axis never to stop ....
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As a species, we suffer from memory lost or denial. History has shown, the cycle repeats over and over. There is no indication it is about to stop anytime soon. But the cycle is a wave with highs and lows. One man's high is another man's low. And so the story goes.
Comment from dragonpoet
This sounds like Jesus asking if we remember Him and the lessons he taught on living a good life. The use of repetition makes it sound
plaintive. It seems like the poem can be an ekphrastic poem inspired by
the artwork.
Keep writing
Joan
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2020
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This sounds like Jesus asking if we remember Him and the lessons he taught on living a good life. The use of repetition makes it sound
plaintive. It seems like the poem can be an ekphrastic poem inspired by
the artwork.
Keep writing
Joan
Comment Written 06-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2020
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This poem is a perfect free verse and is all about ... guess who ... HITLER!
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I would never have guessed. With the Bible verse and the picture.
But I can see that he though he was God.
dp
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Anytime ...
Comment from kahpot
A very powerful read though a bit confusing- kill with swords then love? to die once is the concept of being born once, I did enjoy this read as it got my imagination working, thank you for sharing****kahpot
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2020
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A very powerful read though a bit confusing- kill with swords then love? to die once is the concept of being born once, I did enjoy this read as it got my imagination working, thank you for sharing****kahpot
Comment Written 05-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2020
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Excellent I am glad you chose those words as they are the main crux of how this individuals providence swallowed a whole earth and nearly won ...It talks about killing with my words which is a representation of how this individuals speeches roused and collectively enforced his megalomania into is own brotherhood of hate it was after much talking his love came next and as history show his love for his arian friends destroyed the humanity and peace of an otherwise harmonious universe.
His concept of regeneration which in its fruition is actually anew birth meant that yes we would all have to die that he may indeed live and thankfully he only now lives in history but never to be forgotten ... remember me?
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Thank you for your follow up and helping me understand I shall read again with this in mind****kahpot
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anytime ...
Comment from Drew Delaney
Our God is an awesome God! Thank you for sharing this free verse poem about providence. It's about God Almighty caring for his children. Keep up the good work!
Drew
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2020
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Our God is an awesome God! Thank you for sharing this free verse poem about providence. It's about God Almighty caring for his children. Keep up the good work!
Drew
Comment Written 05-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2020
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Thankfully in the end that proved to be true but actually the poem was really all about ... HITLER !!!
Comment from Gert sherwood
Hello Bicpen
I can see from your poem received excellent reviews.
Providence (God has created the stars and the planets, man then man and woman came existence.
Gert
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2020
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Hello Bicpen
I can see from your poem received excellent reviews.
Providence (God has created the stars and the planets, man then man and woman came existence.
Gert
Comment Written 05-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2020
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Much appreciative ... yes indeed fine revelations that have me reeling and reeling in delight and satisfaction such are the wonders of some reviews ...
Providence is a strange thing sometimes on the one hand it is hidden and mysterious and once revealed it can be glorious and knowledgeable one thing it always remains is constant and wondrous ... no matter the horror of providence some good some where will be summoned from its ashes.
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You are welcome Bicpen
Gert
