Breaking Away Free
The feeling of climbing out of a trap of any kind!4 total reviews
Comment from Julio Miranda
Enjoyable to the last image.
Much like a good comic strip,
each line depicts a continuation
of an elevation of action,
from the uplifting feeling of non-constraint,
to the explosiveness of shackles breaking
and crashing to the ground,
to you soaring ecstatically through the air.
Thank you.
reply by the author on 19-May-2012
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Enjoyable to the last image.
Much like a good comic strip,
each line depicts a continuation
of an elevation of action,
from the uplifting feeling of non-constraint,
to the explosiveness of shackles breaking
and crashing to the ground,
to you soaring ecstatically through the air.
Thank you.
Comment Written 19-May-2012
reply by the author on 19-May-2012
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Oh! Thank you very much. Im just beginning so i really appreciate any compliments or advice that i can get.
Comment from c_lucas
You have conquered a difficult poetic style 5-7-5. Now learn to use stronger verbs.
*****
I have become free!
The shackles have been released(destroyed)!!!
I am now flying! (The skies beckon me)
****
I am impressed with this attempt. Charlie
reply by the author on 19-May-2012
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You have conquered a difficult poetic style 5-7-5. Now learn to use stronger verbs.
*****
I have become free!
The shackles have been released(destroyed)!!!
I am now flying! (The skies beckon me)
****
I am impressed with this attempt. Charlie
Comment Written 19-May-2012
reply by the author on 19-May-2012
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thank you for the input. im always willing to learn more.
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You're welcome.
Comment from mumsyone
I have become free!
The shackles have been released!!!
I am now flying!
You truly have caught the relieved sense of becoming free, after being trapped or held back for any reason. Good job.
reply by the author on 18-May-2012
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I have become free!
The shackles have been released!!!
I am now flying!
You truly have caught the relieved sense of becoming free, after being trapped or held back for any reason. Good job.
Comment Written 18-May-2012
reply by the author on 18-May-2012
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Thank you. I think we have all felt that tied down feeling so i wanted to push all that negativity feeling away and just feel nothing but pure freedom. thanks again
Comment from adewpearl
Your poem is in excellent 5/7/5 format
I like the enthusiastic delivery of the speaker and the alliterative pairing of free/flying
Brooke :-)
reply by the author on 18-May-2012
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Your poem is in excellent 5/7/5 format
I like the enthusiastic delivery of the speaker and the alliterative pairing of free/flying
Brooke :-)
Comment Written 18-May-2012
reply by the author on 18-May-2012
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Thank you so much! After having felt tied down my whole life, i thought of just what i would feel like to be relieved of it all! thanks again
