Comment from Hitcher

Excellent

I loved the darkness of your offering friend, my kind of poetry and you have done it in a sonnet, I'm very impressed indeed. I love your choice of artwork[perfect].
My only suggestion would be to change the background color to black and the writing to white, it will JUMP out at the reader and have them hooked before they read a single word. LOVED IT!! Good luck Dawn Of Tomorrow :)

 Comment Written 09-Mar-2012

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reply by the author on 12-Mar-2012

Thanks so much for the enthusiastic review, very much appreciated.

Comment from Bobbi22

Excellent

This is a very well written sonnet, all in perfect form. Your last two lines are very powerful. The devil may have a hold onus at times, but that grip as foretold will be broken.

 Comment Written 09-Mar-2012

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reply by the author on 09-Mar-2012

thanks so much for taking the time to read and review, much appreciated

Comment from Anisa-

Excellent

Wow. Strong poem. Well done. It has an interesting story within, it's easy to follow and it flows well. It was an enjoyable read.

Thanks for sharing.

Anisa

 Comment Written 09-Mar-2012

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reply by the author on 09-Mar-2012

Thanks so much for taking the time to read and review, much appreciated

Comment from Janice Canerdy

Excellent

This is a really good sonnet--in form (rhyme and meter) and in theme. Thas's right. Satan has only the power God
allows--and only for as long as God chooses.

 Comment Written 08-Mar-2012

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reply by the author on 09-Mar-2012

Thanks so much for taking the time to read and review, much appreciated

Comment from LovnPeace

Exceptional

This world is swayed into your heinous hold
but soon I'll break that grip as is foretold

Beautifully worded dear friend. I pray it is soon. Blessings Jolynn. Barbara

 Comment Written 08-Mar-2012

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reply by the author on 09-Mar-2012

Thanks so much, my friend, very much appreciated. Hugs.

Comment from sweetwoodjax

Excellent

this is very well written, dawn of tomorrow, you did a great job wriitng this sonnet about the way Jesus overcame the grip that Satan holds on this world. i enjoyed reading it and wish you the best of luck in the contest

 Comment Written 07-Mar-2012

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reply by the author on 08-Mar-2012

Thank you so much for taking the time to read and review, very much appreciated.

Comment from WLHall

Excellent

A great iambic pentameter. The words are so powerful as is the message. Wonderful flow. I love the last two lines especially. Yes, the devil will be the loser in this spiritual war, but so many casualties taken with him. Great work! Best Wishes,
Wanda

 Comment Written 07-Mar-2012

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reply by the author on 08-Mar-2012

yes too many casualties, thanks so much for taking the time to read and review

Comment from samandlancelot

Excellent

Dawn,

Excellent sonnet.

You capture so well the essence of the trap so many find themselves in, unaware of the one who contains them. I was one of them for decades until God set me free to serve Him.

but soon I'll break that grip as is foretold!" I do hope and pray it will be soon.

Patricia

 Comment Written 07-Mar-2012

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reply by the author on 08-Mar-2012

I hope and pray that as well, thanks for taking the time to read and review.

Comment from Chris Tee

Excellent

This is an absolutely wonderful sonnet that you have composed here for us old sport. Well done with this splendid work and good luck in the contest.

 Comment Written 07-Mar-2012

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reply by the author on 08-Mar-2012

Thanks so much for taking the time to read and review.

Comment from racingponies

Good

Powerful imagery in the beginning of the poem. Nice photo and layout to go with. Good use of your range of vocabulary as well.

 Comment Written 07-Mar-2012

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reply by the author on 08-Mar-2012

Thanks so much for taking the time to read and review, do you have some suggestions for improvement? When handing out fours you should always give thoughts on how to improve the poem.

reply by racingponies on 08-Mar-2012

Hi. I am happy to respond. I'm just getting back into this and poetry is not my strong suit. Also, I was a little gun shy about constructive criticism. LOL

So, I though the first two stanzas were strong and bold. I was a little confused when you said, "He challenges this one..." I wasn't sure if you meant the writer of the poem was the savior? Maybe "the" instead of "this?" It depends on what you mean. I found the third stanza clunky. I think because most of the "sentences" were broken up to make them rhyme and it felt awkward.

I felt that last two lines were anti-climactic and too "tied up." Also, I felt that the last line was written in a more modern style than the previous verbage.

I probably shouldn't review poetry because all the things I've brought up are probably moot. LOL But, I know with my writings, I prefer real criticism so I can pick and choose was sticks.

Good luck in the contest!