Love and Phoenix Tears
Viewing comments for Chapter 2 "Fine!"A Harry Potter fanfiction!
4 total reviews
Comment from Karen Cherry Threadgill
You are completely true to the story. However, you do not say where your pictures come from. They should be acknowledged in the author's notes. This is the courtesy that makes them free. Unless you drew them, in which case I am extremely jealous of you. :-) Keep them coming. Karen
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You are completely true to the story. However, you do not say where your pictures come from. They should be acknowledged in the author's notes. This is the courtesy that makes them free. Unless you drew them, in which case I am extremely jealous of you. :-) Keep them coming. Karen
Comment Written 30-Jan-2024
Comment from susand3022
Lilly and James... sitting in a tree... K-I-S-S-I-N-G... hahahahaha!!! I wonder how long it will take until it gets to that point... probably not until at least the end of the year... or the next one! :)
reply by the author on 08-Apr-2020
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Lilly and James... sitting in a tree... K-I-S-S-I-N-G... hahahahaha!!! I wonder how long it will take until it gets to that point... probably not until at least the end of the year... or the next one! :)
Comment Written 08-Apr-2020
reply by the author on 08-Apr-2020
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hahahah. You know it gets there!! =D
Comment from Torrence Winter
Bringing your story forward with excellent pacing and genuine dialogue seems to be the height of your talent. The story moves with gentile pace that allows the reader to fully enjoy it. There was no spag that I could find. Looking forward to reading more. :)
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2011
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Bringing your story forward with excellent pacing and genuine dialogue seems to be the height of your talent. The story moves with gentile pace that allows the reader to fully enjoy it. There was no spag that I could find. Looking forward to reading more. :)
Comment Written 04-Dec-2011
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2011
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thank youu! glad you're enjoying this!
Comment from Roberta Joan Jensen
Is this a take-off on Harry Potter?
Here's a few suggestions.
James finished stuffing his dresser full of his clothes[] and flopped onto his new bed with a smile. --- Use a comma before "and" only when what follows is a complete sentence. Also, it reads like the bed has a smile.
He reached into his bag[] and pulled out a small mirror.
James knelt down next to her[] and picked up a few quills and a Defense Against the
have more dances and other social events[] to keep the students' minds off of the war and to help unite the school.
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2011
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Is this a take-off on Harry Potter?
Here's a few suggestions.
James finished stuffing his dresser full of his clothes[] and flopped onto his new bed with a smile. --- Use a comma before "and" only when what follows is a complete sentence. Also, it reads like the bed has a smile.
He reached into his bag[] and pulled out a small mirror.
James knelt down next to her[] and picked up a few quills and a Defense Against the
have more dances and other social events[] to keep the students' minds off of the war and to help unite the school.
Comment Written 04-Dec-2011
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2011
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hhehe yes it is a take off of harry potter! just something I"ve been working on as a little fun exercise :) thanks for the helpful comment!
