If The Jester Cried At Night
Viewing comments for Chapter 25 "Tales of Furniture and Folly"A collection of favourite poems by mrgrunty.
29 total reviews
Comment from Permelia
I love your lines "I have a cupboard full of yesterdays and broken dreams
and I have a bed full of emptiness and could have beens- wish I could hear this song- My granddaughter wrote a poem about her Papa (my husband) when she was 8 years old, and she used a word not in the dictionary. We checked 5 dictionaries- she got upset, and said, "Well if it is not a word, it should be, cause that describes my Papa." She called him precisive. I'll have to let her know it is in my new Websters Encyclopedic Unabridged Dictionary- she will be delighted. (She is 15 now)
  |
I love your lines "I have a cupboard full of yesterdays and broken dreams
and I have a bed full of emptiness and could have beens- wish I could hear this song- My granddaughter wrote a poem about her Papa (my husband) when she was 8 years old, and she used a word not in the dictionary. We checked 5 dictionaries- she got upset, and said, "Well if it is not a word, it should be, cause that describes my Papa." She called him precisive. I'll have to let her know it is in my new Websters Encyclopedic Unabridged Dictionary- she will be delighted. (She is 15 now)
Comment Written 26-Jan-2005
Comment from Nescher Pyscher
I'm never quite sure how to READ a song. I always want to try and force it into a pattern I'd enjoy, and that ends up making the author look bad, usually. :0P
Still, I loved the premise, so here's a fiver. :0)
|
I'm never quite sure how to READ a song. I always want to try and force it into a pattern I'd enjoy, and that ends up making the author look bad, usually. :0P
Still, I loved the premise, so here's a fiver. :0)
Comment Written 16-Jan-2005
Comment from New Day Rising
Grant,
Nicely done, it is difficult for me to review song lyrics, but I will use my imagination on this one, it did catchy phrasing to it. I could see it working very well as song. It would be cool to hear some instrumentation with this though. If you ever do let me know, I would be interested in hearing it. Well done.
Robert
|
Grant,
Nicely done, it is difficult for me to review song lyrics, but I will use my imagination on this one, it did catchy phrasing to it. I could see it working very well as song. It would be cool to hear some instrumentation with this though. If you ever do let me know, I would be interested in hearing it. Well done.
Robert
Comment Written 09-Jan-2005
Comment from Waterbird
And anytime I, try to, open them I can't.
** It's not that, I don't want to, but I don't believe. - maybe -
And anytime I try to open them I can't.
It's not that I don't want to, but I don't believe.
Lots of commas that aren't needed here. In
fact, lots of punctuation issues in this work. Still,
I loved lines like - cupboard full of yesterdays,
and broken dreams, and - a bed that's full of emptiness,
and could have beens. With lines like this, I was
blown away.
|
And anytime I, try to, open them I can't.
** It's not that, I don't want to, but I don't believe. - maybe -
And anytime I try to open them I can't.
It's not that I don't want to, but I don't believe.
Lots of commas that aren't needed here. In
fact, lots of punctuation issues in this work. Still,
I loved lines like - cupboard full of yesterdays,
and broken dreams, and - a bed that's full of emptiness,
and could have beens. With lines like this, I was
blown away.
Comment Written 09-Jan-2005
Comment from L K Pinaire
A song. This is very nice also. It was nicely written but I like you poems better. All in all, thought, it was nice. Best of luck to you.
Larry
|
A song. This is very nice also. It was nicely written but I like you poems better. All in all, thought, it was nice. Best of luck to you.
Larry
Comment Written 09-Jan-2005
Comment from Shirley Ann Bunyan
An original and clever piece. In the 2nd to last line - do you need so many comma's? and anytime I try to quiet them, I can't.
bunny
|
An original and clever piece. In the 2nd to last line - do you need so many comma's? and anytime I try to quiet them, I can't.
bunny
Comment Written 09-Jan-2005
Comment from surrender
That was some metaphor. I found 'onlyness' works quite well here. Oxford will have no objection. He may pluck it from here and paste it in his book. The poem is very nice and meaningful.
|
That was some metaphor. I found 'onlyness' works quite well here. Oxford will have no objection. He may pluck it from here and paste it in his book. The poem is very nice and meaningful.
Comment Written 09-Jan-2005
Comment from cmaxx
I was just going to ask you if you wrote songs . . .Until I read the notes and then understood fully that you quite obviously do!
Like the way you used asterisks and punctuation to imply syncopation perhaps?? Just a guess! Loved the vibe of the whole piece - it definitely has potential as a song - pity you can't bang the tune down on this site! :-) And yep - also like 'onlyness' I'm all for creating and broadening language . . .It's part of our evolution! Way ta go!
|
I was just going to ask you if you wrote songs . . .Until I read the notes and then understood fully that you quite obviously do!
Like the way you used asterisks and punctuation to imply syncopation perhaps?? Just a guess! Loved the vibe of the whole piece - it definitely has potential as a song - pity you can't bang the tune down on this site! :-) And yep - also like 'onlyness' I'm all for creating and broadening language . . .It's part of our evolution! Way ta go!
Comment Written 09-Jan-2005
Comment from StolenGazebo
What a clever piece. I really liked how you used furniture metaphors to enhance your imagery here. It all worked exceptionally well, my friend. Don't change a thing.
|
What a clever piece. I really liked how you used furniture metaphors to enhance your imagery here. It all worked exceptionally well, my friend. Don't change a thing.
Comment Written 08-Jan-2005
Comment from Elliesbiggestfan
We never quite know what we are going to get from you do we G lol.
"I've got a bed that's full of emptiness,
and could have beens.
And a lamp that turns on only when,
I dream of you"
-Absolutely inspired words, you cant take the poet out of the song lyrics my friend, lol. Beautiful piece G...
|
We never quite know what we are going to get from you do we G lol.
"I've got a bed that's full of emptiness,
and could have beens.
And a lamp that turns on only when,
I dream of you"
-Absolutely inspired words, you cant take the poet out of the song lyrics my friend, lol. Beautiful piece G...
Comment Written 08-Jan-2005
