Paranormal Adventures
Viewing comments for Chapter 14 "At the Precipice"Case Studies of Hauntings
56 total reviews
Comment from Cumbrianlass
Well, first of all, that picture is completely freaky. This is great, Bev. A good exploration of characters, I thought. I like the way you handle the interactions of the team. These people are very real in their thoughts, dialogue and actions.
Luke pretzel-twisted his spine - great imagery. Love this.
Bring on the next, my friend! Spooky is good. Av xx
He's up something - missing the 'to'
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2011
  |
Well, first of all, that picture is completely freaky. This is great, Bev. A good exploration of characters, I thought. I like the way you handle the interactions of the team. These people are very real in their thoughts, dialogue and actions.
Luke pretzel-twisted his spine - great imagery. Love this.
Bring on the next, my friend! Spooky is good. Av xx
He's up something - missing the 'to'
Comment Written 02-Oct-2011
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2011
-
Thank you, Av. I really appreciate your wonderful insights into the story and how it's going. That is very helpful to me and I'm glad for the assistance and loyalty in following along with me, my friend. Bright blessings, Bev
Comment from InterestingRon
Hi Bev
A well written installment to your book.
Excellent dialogue and descriptions that give the reader background information about the characters, and their role in the team.
Of course, I liked the cat having kittens best! You left us on a cliff edge. What is about to appear? Cue spooky music!
Ron xox
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2011
|
Hi Bev
A well written installment to your book.
Excellent dialogue and descriptions that give the reader background information about the characters, and their role in the team.
Of course, I liked the cat having kittens best! You left us on a cliff edge. What is about to appear? Cue spooky music!
Ron xox
Comment Written 02-Oct-2011
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2011
-
Thank you so much for your awesome review, Ron. I appreciate you letting me know what you liked in the chapter. It helps as I go foward with the story. I sure appreciate your loyally following along! Hugs, Bev
Comment from Mariea
Good morning. I thoroughly enjoyed this well written chapter. Character and dialogue realistic without any clutter. The story develops well as it progresses and leaves me waiting for the next one.
Para starting 'Luke rushed' - insert 'to' after 'up'
Have a great day, hugs Mia
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2011
|
Good morning. I thoroughly enjoyed this well written chapter. Character and dialogue realistic without any clutter. The story develops well as it progresses and leaves me waiting for the next one.
Para starting 'Luke rushed' - insert 'to' after 'up'
Have a great day, hugs Mia
Comment Written 02-Oct-2011
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2011
-
Hello, Mia. Thank you so much for your insightful and generous review. I appreciate the heads up on the SPAG and have changed it. Your generosity is much appreciated...Bev
Comment from c_lucas
Obviously, Maze is not a Familiar, taking off without making sure the girls were awake and aware of the danger. This is very well written.
***
This has a strong twist at the end. I did not find any errors in it. Good job.
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2011
|
Obviously, Maze is not a Familiar, taking off without making sure the girls were awake and aware of the danger. This is very well written.
***
This has a strong twist at the end. I did not find any errors in it. Good job.
Comment Written 02-Oct-2011
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2011
-
Ooh, charlie, you reveal interesting layers in your words here. Thanks for your great review! I appreciate it...Bev
-
You're welcome, Bev. Charlie
Comment from adewpearl
Good natural-sounding dialogue
that conveys the emotions and opinions of the speakers well.
typo alert - good time to discuss our opItions
candle's lit in each window - drop the apostrophe in this plural, not possessive word
Where have you come from, sweetie? - add question mark
Why don't you give it up for tonight, Luke? - add question mark
Mage, who was laying in the trough - lying
Excellent detail throughout :-) Brooke
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2011
|
Good natural-sounding dialogue
that conveys the emotions and opinions of the speakers well.
typo alert - good time to discuss our opItions
candle's lit in each window - drop the apostrophe in this plural, not possessive word
Where have you come from, sweetie? - add question mark
Why don't you give it up for tonight, Luke? - add question mark
Mage, who was laying in the trough - lying
Excellent detail throughout :-) Brooke
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 02-Oct-2011
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2011
-
Hiya, Brooke. Seems like I'm a little rusty - need to take your class again lol! You know I debated over the lying versus laying - should have gone with my first instinct. Hey, thank you so very much for your time and attention to my chapter, Brooke. Your review and generosity mean a lot to me. Blessings, Bev
-
:-)
Comment from Gungalo
Oh oh, wonder what has entered that room? The cat knew it and got lost in a big hurry. I sense something evil comes this way. Pray tell they wake in time!!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2011
|
Oh oh, wonder what has entered that room? The cat knew it and got lost in a big hurry. I sense something evil comes this way. Pray tell they wake in time!!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 02-Oct-2011
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2011
-
Hmmm, I'm not telling just yet, Gungalo. Thanks for your review and generosity. I appreciate it! Take care, Bev
-
Sigh ...
