Adrift
a contest entry about loneliness122 total reviews
Comment from c_lucas
It is a sad thing when love turns cold. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for an easy read. Good luck in your contest.
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2011
  |
It is a sad thing when love turns cold. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for an easy read. Good luck in your contest.
Comment Written 06-Jun-2011
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2011
-
Thanks so much for taking the time to read & critique my poem, Adrift.
have a great day - sherry
-
You're welcome, Sherry. Charlie
Comment from ksherwoodrn
How many women have experienced this? So sad, yet brings to light the truth about many marriages. (not mine, thank goodness) Thanks for sharing...kathleen
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2011
|
How many women have experienced this? So sad, yet brings to light the truth about many marriages. (not mine, thank goodness) Thanks for sharing...kathleen
Comment Written 06-Jun-2011
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2011
-
Morning, Kathleen - Thanks so much for taking the time to read & critique my poem, Adrift. It is bad enough to experience this for a short time (stress at work, not the relationship), but I used that time to build the feelings & emotions within this piece. Hopefully I got it right ...
have a great day - sherry
Comment from misscookie
This is a very heart aching poem to read about a male or female. No one should stay in that hell and for what. This is what I call a food for thought poem... Meaning after you read it you good mm. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2011
|
This is a very heart aching poem to read about a male or female. No one should stay in that hell and for what. This is what I call a food for thought poem... Meaning after you read it you good mm. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 06-Jun-2011
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2011
-
Thanks so much for taking the time to read & commenting on my poem, Adrift.
have a great day - sherry
-
Your welcome, you have a great day also.
Comment from sweetwoodjax
this is very well written, sherry. a wonderful job writing this tanka about a love that has died and left the pain behind, i wish you the best of luck in the contest....
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2011
|
this is very well written, sherry. a wonderful job writing this tanka about a love that has died and left the pain behind, i wish you the best of luck in the contest....
Comment Written 06-Jun-2011
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2011
-
Thanks so much for taking the time to read & commenting on my poem, Adrift.
have a great day - sherry
Comment from lola29
Your Tanka entry is soo sad. So many people, who started out with such high expectations about their lives, somehow change and withdraw. Your expressions truly tug at the heartstrings.
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2011
|
Your Tanka entry is soo sad. So many people, who started out with such high expectations about their lives, somehow change and withdraw. Your expressions truly tug at the heartstrings.
Comment Written 06-Jun-2011
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2011
-
Morning Lola - Thanks so much for taking the time to read & comment on my poem, Adrift.
have a great day - sherry
Comment from l.raven
Very nicely written.Sad as it is sometimes love just goes it's own way.Has a good little flow to it.And the picture speaks for itself.good work
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2011
|
Very nicely written.Sad as it is sometimes love just goes it's own way.Has a good little flow to it.And the picture speaks for itself.good work
Comment Written 06-Jun-2011
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2011
-
Thanks so much for taking the time to read & critique my poem, Adrift.
have a great day - sherry
Comment from Jeanie Mercer
The figures of flood and storm in this tanka capture the strong emotion off the scene. I particularly like the last line: "tattered like storm-shattered sails." Good luck to you, Jeanie Mercer
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2011
|
The figures of flood and storm in this tanka capture the strong emotion off the scene. I particularly like the last line: "tattered like storm-shattered sails." Good luck to you, Jeanie Mercer
Comment Written 06-Jun-2011
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2011
-
Thanks so much, Jeanie, for taking the time to read & critique my poem, Adrift. The last line is my favorite, too. Glad it has another fan.
have a great day - sherry
Comment from patwannabe
sherrygreywolf, I like it. It seems so strange that love can turn to hate or boredom and the marriage falls into disrepair. It must be true because it happens all the time. It happened to me, too. In all my years, I only know of two marriages made in heaven.
Well thought out, well written. pat
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2011
|
sherrygreywolf, I like it. It seems so strange that love can turn to hate or boredom and the marriage falls into disrepair. It must be true because it happens all the time. It happened to me, too. In all my years, I only know of two marriages made in heaven.
Well thought out, well written. pat
Comment Written 06-Jun-2011
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2011
-
Hi Pat - Thanks so much for taking the time to read & comment on my poem, Adrift. I've got a marriage that is close to the 'made in heaven' status, but even we have our moments when things are just not meshing the way they should (and I won't even go into my first marriage - some things are just better left unsaid).
Again, thanks for the review & have a great day - sherry
Comment from AprilShower
Hi, sherry. This is a sad one. I imagine this is not a very enjoyable write for a contest. I think you did well with it, though. Loneliness comes in many forms and ways. Thank you for sharing this with us. April
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2011
|
Hi, sherry. This is a sad one. I imagine this is not a very enjoyable write for a contest. I think you did well with it, though. Loneliness comes in many forms and ways. Thank you for sharing this with us. April
Comment Written 06-Jun-2011
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2011
-
Morning, April - Thanks so much for taking the time to read & comment on my poem, Adrift. Actually, I loved writing this poem. I had had some comments that some of my work was just a bit to flippant to be in serious competition for the contests, so I decided to try one a bit deeper and contemplative for a change. I don't generally feel this way, but a couple of months ago, my husband was going through a rough patch at work & was distant for several days and I started thinking about what it would be like if his distance was caused by the relationship & didn't change. That's where this idea came from. Hope you enjoyed the imagery.
hugs - sherry
have a great day - sherry
-
We writers draw on every emotion for our writings. They may be brief and have nothing to do with the subject we are writing about, but they make the writing more realistic. This I know from experience. You're welcome, sherry.
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Your short poem is very emotional. You did a good job writing it. I am a TX gal myself. Brought here by the military. My husband retired, but we stayed. I'm in Copperas Cove, not too far away.
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2011
|
Your short poem is very emotional. You did a good job writing it. I am a TX gal myself. Brought here by the military. My husband retired, but we stayed. I'm in Copperas Cove, not too far away.
Comment Written 06-Jun-2011
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2011
-
Hi Barbara - it's always good to 'meet' a fellow Texan. I was actually born here (fifth generation), so I guess I'm part of a dying breed ... Thanks so much for taking the time to read my poem, Adrift. Hope you enjoyed it.
Have a great day - sherry
