Reviews from

Paranormal Adventures

Viewing comments for Chapter 5 "The Guardians Gather"
Case Studies of Hauntings

70 total reviews 
Comment from Piggies Grandma
Excellent
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This is getting very interesting. I enjoyed reading this chapter and I am looking forward to reading the next one. It is well thought out and very well written.

 Comment Written 25-May-2011


reply by the author on 26-May-2011
    Hi, Piggies Grandma. Thanks for the words of support and for taking time to read my chapter. I really appreciate your feedback and interest. Warm regards, Bev
Comment from Bellringer
Excellent
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Bev, another well written chapter. The first part of your chapter provides an eerie scene showing the infamous Charles Bellingham hiding in fear--wonder what could scare him so. The details of the hotel were exceptional and you managed to maintain the tension of the story. Carrot cake pancakes with cream cheese frosting! Oh my. Delicious writing, my friend. Blessings, Hector

 Comment Written 25-May-2011


reply by the author on 25-May-2011
    Hi, Hector. Thank you for taking on my fifth chaper! I really so appreciate your support and generosity. Glad you liked the descriptions. I have the heart of an interior decorator - so I guess that came through LOL. Warmest regards, Bev
reply by Bellringer on 25-May-2011
    A pleasure to read, Bev. Blessings, Hector
Comment from adewpearl
Excellent
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Excellent dialogue - you show Mia's state of exhaustion and unrest well.
Your depiction of what went on back in 1918 is most dramatic - what a horrific scene you create through your vivid detail. Brooke

 Comment Written 25-May-2011


reply by the author on 25-May-2011
    Hi, Brooke. Thanks so much for stopping by. I had to show off my new-found knowledge of action verbs in the first half of the story! LOL Really appreciate your support and generous review. Warm regards, Bev
Comment from misscookie
Excellent
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Thank you very much for the large print in the story. It truly helps me to read it. And I'm sure other reader with sailing eyesight will feel the same way. I enjoyed reading this chapter and found it very interesting. Thank you for sharing.

 Comment Written 25-May-2011


reply by the author on 25-May-2011
    You are most welcome, misscookie. I really appreciate your warm and generous review, lovely lady. Blessings, Bev
reply by misscookie on 26-May-2011
    have a blessed day.
Comment from InterestingRon
Excellent
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Hi Bev
I don't know if it was intended - but the text for your story has an extremely large font size. Author's notes are the usual standard size,
This chapter got off to a tremendous start - the melting door handle was a delicious touch. The second haunting was more tame, but intriguing.
You're going from strength to strength with this.
Ron xox

 Comment Written 25-May-2011


reply by the author on 25-May-2011
    Hi, Ron. I'm chuckling to myself because I just got a big thank-you from a reviewer who thanked me for the larger font size! I've had at least two people in the past suggest that it helps and an equal number don't like it. But, your point is well taken and I know your intention is to help the piece get a better viewing. Thanks, my friend. I appreciate your support and praise for the piece. Warm regards, Bev
Comment from bhogg
Excellent
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A really fun read here. I particularly enjoyed the descriptors of the two rooms. Ended with a bit of tension, so I guess we will all have to stay tuned. Regards, Bill

 Comment Written 25-May-2011


reply by the author on 25-May-2011
    Glad you liked it and had some fun, Bill. I appreciate your generous review and interest very much. Thanks for stopping by!Warm regards, Bev
Comment from quashdog
Excellent
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Good chpter, moves the story right along. I liked the dialogue at the end between the two spirits, it draws the battle lines for the skirmish that is still up ahead with the evil ghost.

 Comment Written 25-May-2011


reply by the author on 25-May-2011
    Hi, quashdog. I really appreciate your wonderful review. Thanks so much for stopping by! Warm regards, Bev
Comment from The Stranger
Excellent
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this is an exceppebt story, the presentation is of a very high standard, I enjoyed being able to review work of such a high standard

 Comment Written 25-May-2011


reply by the author on 25-May-2011
    Hi, TS. I am so honored by your wonderful review. Your generous insights are most appreciated, as is your support! Warm regards, Bev
Comment from Cletus Hardiman
Excellent
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You keep them coming and I'll keep reading......LOL This is a nice write...... Thanks for sharing! Cletus Hardiman Clete

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 Comment Written 25-May-2011


reply by the author on 25-May-2011
    Hi, Clete. Thanks for the vote of support. And I really appreciate you reading! Warm regards, Bev
reply by Cletus Hardiman on 25-May-2011
    You are welcome for the review! Clete
Comment from Pen&Ink
Excellent
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Good Morning, Bev. This is a very well-written chapter which needs only slight tweaking. You allow conversation to carry much of the plot. Your use of detail in the descriptions is excellent. Here are my suggestions for your consideration.

After introductions were completed,

No need for "were completed".

At the disgusted look on Emma's face, Mia began to laugh and soon had her friend joining in with her.

Rearranged:

Mia began to laugh (at the disgusted look on Emma's face, and soon had her friend joining in.")

pivotted
(pivoted)

Good job on this chapter.

Ray



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 Comment Written 25-May-2011


reply by the author on 25-May-2011
    Hi, Ray. Thanks much for the helpful suggestion, which I think are very good. I appreciate you taking time to read the chapter with an eye for details and improvement. I also am grateful for your interest and generous review. Warm regards, Bev