Immortality On Borrowed Time
A sonnet on our fleeting life.116 total reviews
Comment from donnadiann
The poem is a reminder to all of us that we are only here for a brief period. We will live in heaven, if we choose Jesus. Happy writng--great sonnet.
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2011
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The poem is a reminder to all of us that we are only here for a brief period. We will live in heaven, if we choose Jesus. Happy writng--great sonnet.
Comment Written 21-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2011
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I enjoyed this review and thank you for it~! Mike
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You are welcome:)
Comment from Akarva
This poem based on the footprints of our life,the footprints we leave behind long after we are gone, the way we have lived and he hopes to be remembered for eternity. Pleasing one with a moral indeed.
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2011
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This poem based on the footprints of our life,the footprints we leave behind long after we are gone, the way we have lived and he hopes to be remembered for eternity. Pleasing one with a moral indeed.
Comment Written 21-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2011
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I'll be honest, I enjoy poetry so much because it allows me not only to convey my many experiences, but also to enjoy aspects of life that I would never want to particapate in. To me, that is the fun that poetry produces, but the obligation to writing is in gaining the courage to write what truly needs to be said. I also hope that that writing never repels a person not to continue to read poems such as this, which I consider one of my greater works. I really enjoyed your review and thank you for it and your compliments. Mike
Comment from Dom G Robles
Nicely written. This seems to be more of an Essay or Prose than a poem. Though the rhyme and rhythm are great, I feel that it is more of a discussion, illustration, belief
and contention. It is meaningful and discusses some kind of philosophy inherent in an essay. Congratulations.
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2011
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Nicely written. This seems to be more of an Essay or Prose than a poem. Though the rhyme and rhythm are great, I feel that it is more of a discussion, illustration, belief
and contention. It is meaningful and discusses some kind of philosophy inherent in an essay. Congratulations.
Comment Written 21-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2011
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Hopefully it is all of those things and a sonnet to boot! I enjoyed this review and thank you for it and the compliments. Mike
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You are welcome Mike. Dom
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You are welcome Mike.
Comment from Mithma
This is so very well done and very beautiful explanation to life. The rhyme, words and flow is perfect. I like your last stanza better added as an after thought. Thanks for sharing
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2011
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This is so very well done and very beautiful explanation to life. The rhyme, words and flow is perfect. I like your last stanza better added as an after thought. Thanks for sharing
Comment Written 21-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2011
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I thank you for reviewing this, you compliments and this enjoyable review. I like your observation, as I wanted the body to be less personal so the reader could consider my thoughts, yet have an inspirational personal ending that might produce an, "Uh ha!" in the reader.
Comment from Twomoon
Mike, ah, lovely tea and warmth here. A message that leaves one feeling, hum............. one of them has to be me! lol..this was deep and very interesting, I enjoy your poetry and love seeing it here. I love the immortality on Borrowed Time...nice thought! I think we are all on that! hugs and much love twomoon
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2011
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Mike, ah, lovely tea and warmth here. A message that leaves one feeling, hum............. one of them has to be me! lol..this was deep and very interesting, I enjoy your poetry and love seeing it here. I love the immortality on Borrowed Time...nice thought! I think we are all on that! hugs and much love twomoon
Comment Written 21-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2011
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I do need to start doing more poetry, but I am bogged down with thoughts about the bio. Must find time to get that done first. I love this review and thank you for it very much. Yes, much love Two! Mike
Comment from cheyennewy
Hi Mike,
This is an accomplished sonnet...one of my favorite poetry forms. Your iambic pentameter is well done with a good cadence and AB/AB rhyme. It is so true that some squander their time and it is impossible to live without some calamity but it is what we learn that's important. I have trod over many paths with difficult stones but for some reason have navigated all of them. A great sonnet with a powerful message...a six star poem for sure. Well done, chey
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2011
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Hi Mike,
This is an accomplished sonnet...one of my favorite poetry forms. Your iambic pentameter is well done with a good cadence and AB/AB rhyme. It is so true that some squander their time and it is impossible to live without some calamity but it is what we learn that's important. I have trod over many paths with difficult stones but for some reason have navigated all of them. A great sonnet with a powerful message...a six star poem for sure. Well done, chey
Comment Written 21-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2011
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I figured a sonnet would be that best form, but it took an hour or two to determine, "Which fricking sonnet..." Being the writer that you are, this review is very touching to me. I thank you for it, the compliments and this review. Mike
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You are most welcome...it is a very fine poem...chey
Comment from jsantoemmajr
The closing message in your final couplet truly save this poem. The rhyme scheme is dictating your verses and complicating and diluting your message, I think. In fact, I had trouble with comprehending many lines. There are also the cliches that pull away from the poem's sincerity; "sands of time" - "hourglass" - "die before their prime" - "on eagle's wing" these do not add validity to your overall message, but pull away from the poem's originality and sincerity. Sorry, but were it not for the end couplet, one star would have been all I could gift.
reply by the author on 21-Feb-2011
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The closing message in your final couplet truly save this poem. The rhyme scheme is dictating your verses and complicating and diluting your message, I think. In fact, I had trouble with comprehending many lines. There are also the cliches that pull away from the poem's sincerity; "sands of time" - "hourglass" - "die before their prime" - "on eagle's wing" these do not add validity to your overall message, but pull away from the poem's originality and sincerity. Sorry, but were it not for the end couplet, one star would have been all I could gift.
Comment Written 21-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 21-Feb-2011
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Perhaps you need to read the rest of the book this is intended for, as that is what I have had to suffer with, not in a cliched manor, but an unconventional one. Lately many readings at funerals are a bit cliched, but brought about by the deceased persons inspirations from hearing them read at others. This sonnet is my best attempt at blending them with what I feel the person should truely consider. I do thank you for reviewing this. Mike
Comment from Laurie Clayton
I feel that our roles as poets is to use words to create pictures within the minds of our readers and hopefully provoke thoughts that otherwise may lie dormant.
This is what your words have done for me.
In provoking thought we bring about change, whether that is on an individual or group level, doesn't matter, what matters is your words/ thoughts have reached out and touched someone.
A fitting end to your Biography, Well done.
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2011
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I feel that our roles as poets is to use words to create pictures within the minds of our readers and hopefully provoke thoughts that otherwise may lie dormant.
This is what your words have done for me.
In provoking thought we bring about change, whether that is on an individual or group level, doesn't matter, what matters is your words/ thoughts have reached out and touched someone.
A fitting end to your Biography, Well done.
Comment Written 21-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2011
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Love this review! But there are times when I feel that poets are more transcriptionists, as we learn to use imagery, combined with observations or what we want to say, in a manner that people can identify with or understand. When I get a review like this, it bestows the best honor that one can get. Thank you so much for the compliments and this review. Mike
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My pleasure...I enjoyed reading your work.
Laurie.
Comment from J. Wheeler
Well done! Your words hit home and made me take time and think. Your final couplet made me light as if I could fly on your words. Great job!
Always,
Joanie
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2011
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Well done! Your words hit home and made me take time and think. Your final couplet made me light as if I could fly on your words. Great job!
Always,
Joanie
Comment Written 21-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 06-Mar-2011
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Wow! I love it when a plan comes together! You make me feel like a member of the A-Team. Thank you very much for this revie, the ultimate of compliments, and you generous rating. Mike
Comment from warbler
I enjoyed reading your poem and thought that it was thought provoking. I'm not sure if I want my footprints to fossilize in clay . Your poem is well written.
reply by the author on 21-Feb-2011
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I enjoyed reading your poem and thought that it was thought provoking. I'm not sure if I want my footprints to fossilize in clay . Your poem is well written.
Comment Written 20-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 21-Feb-2011
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Better a fossilized footprint then a skull in some crazy teenagers bedroom. But I was speaking metaphorically about one's spirit. I really enjoyed this review and thank you for the compliments. Mike
