Poems of Love and Spirit
Viewing comments for Chapter 17 "The Golden Treasure"This book is about love, God's Love most of all.
56 total reviews
Comment from Miss Scarlett
Very nice poem, that I agree with wholeheartedly! I liked the flow, but one line tripped me up: "here is a story that must soon be told." I think it would read better without the word "soon." Just a suggestion. Favorite line: "For wherever we go, we leave a trend," Good job!
reply by the author on 18-Dec-2010
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Very nice poem, that I agree with wholeheartedly! I liked the flow, but one line tripped me up: "here is a story that must soon be told." I think it would read better without the word "soon." Just a suggestion. Favorite line: "For wherever we go, we leave a trend," Good job!
Comment Written 12-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 18-Dec-2010
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Thank you for your honest review, and "soon" I'll check it our. Thank you...
Comment from Summer J Breeze
At first, I could not get past the background colour, I thought it jarred against the picture and was too insipid, but then I zoomed out and took in the whole thing. Much better. I knew you must have chosen it for a reason. Sometimes I just have to look at things differently.
And so I saw the peace to be found in it, and fleshtone, too. Humanity against the magnificent colours that God provides. Both good choices.
Suggestions:
Take 'soon' out of thr 4th line, and it will flow better, I think.
no capital on 'My'
A well-written warning against temptation. Good job.
reply by the author on 18-Dec-2010
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At first, I could not get past the background colour, I thought it jarred against the picture and was too insipid, but then I zoomed out and took in the whole thing. Much better. I knew you must have chosen it for a reason. Sometimes I just have to look at things differently.
And so I saw the peace to be found in it, and fleshtone, too. Humanity against the magnificent colours that God provides. Both good choices.
Suggestions:
Take 'soon' out of thr 4th line, and it will flow better, I think.
no capital on 'My'
A well-written warning against temptation. Good job.
Comment Written 12-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 18-Dec-2010
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Thank you for your honest review, and "soon" I'll check it our. Thank you...
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you're welcome. :)
Comment from cheyennewy
Hi sarahice,
This is a lovely poem full of hope. Your message is uplifting and you have made excellent word choices. Your last quatrain is especially powerful. You have a good rhyme and even flow. Well done. Blessings, chey
reply by the author on 19-Dec-2010
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Hi sarahice,
This is a lovely poem full of hope. Your message is uplifting and you have made excellent word choices. Your last quatrain is especially powerful. You have a good rhyme and even flow. Well done. Blessings, chey
Comment Written 12-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 19-Dec-2010
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Thank you Chey for your encouraging review of my poem. Really appreciate it and feel so honoured.
Comment from dportwood
sarahice,
This series of rhyming quartains is a most pleasant and enjoyable read that sends its spiritual message in a tender, honest manner. Well done.
Duane
reply by the author on 19-Dec-2010
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sarahice,
This series of rhyming quartains is a most pleasant and enjoyable read that sends its spiritual message in a tender, honest manner. Well done.
Duane
Comment Written 12-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 19-Dec-2010
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Thank you Duane for your great and encouraging review. I really appreciate it and feel greatly honoured. With warm greetings, Sarah
Ps. Read you love horses, I love horseback riding, just being with them.
Comment from JSway
This work of devotion really honors the spirit of faith. It's a blessing to be able to reach out and share with others those emotions that move the soul through faith.
reply by the author on 19-Dec-2010
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This work of devotion really honors the spirit of faith. It's a blessing to be able to reach out and share with others those emotions that move the soul through faith.
Comment Written 12-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 19-Dec-2010
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Thank you JSway for your wonderful review. I really appreciate you'r stance on the spirit of faith, the most precious gift we can have. With warmness, Sarah
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You're welcome, Sarah!:)
Comment from kwmalcom
I am new to the site and am enjoying my excursion into literary bliss, especially with poetry like yours! I have never been into poetry but I am finding that I have been missing out.
Your poem is inspiring and speaks to my soul. Though English is not your native tongue you have an excellent command of the language. I look forward to reading more of your work.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 19-Dec-2010
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I am new to the site and am enjoying my excursion into literary bliss, especially with poetry like yours! I have never been into poetry but I am finding that I have been missing out.
Your poem is inspiring and speaks to my soul. Though English is not your native tongue you have an excellent command of the language. I look forward to reading more of your work.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 12-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 19-Dec-2010
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Thank you for your honest review, it was great to hear from you and I'm glad you found my poem speak to your soul. With warm greetings, Sarah
Comment from Nylsaj
Wow this is a deep expression of love reflected from the heart of God who is the source. Love is the spiritual connecting gene in us to God to reflect who He is. When we are totally abandoned to Him we unconsciously walk in His footsteps. This poem has splendidly expressed that love. The poet has exposed their heart and soul for others through His love.
Thanks and God Bless you.
reply by the author on 19-Dec-2010
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Wow this is a deep expression of love reflected from the heart of God who is the source. Love is the spiritual connecting gene in us to God to reflect who He is. When we are totally abandoned to Him we unconsciously walk in His footsteps. This poem has splendidly expressed that love. The poet has exposed their heart and soul for others through His love.
Thanks and God Bless you.
Comment Written 12-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 19-Dec-2010
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Thank you Nylsaj for such a wonderful review, I really appreciate your fineness you express about my poem. I'm really honoured. With warm regards, Sarah
Comment from Mary Ann MCPhedran
HI I do love the theme of your poem it has true and wonderful feelings within the script. The words have captured my attention and held it . And the spiritual message within is lovely. A good write within good flow.
Mary
reply by the author on 19-Dec-2010
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HI I do love the theme of your poem it has true and wonderful feelings within the script. The words have captured my attention and held it . And the spiritual message within is lovely. A good write within good flow.
Mary
Comment Written 12-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 19-Dec-2010
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Thank you Cookson for your wonderful review, and I'm so glad the script encouraged your heart and strengthened your spirit. With warm greeting, Sarah
Comment from Herb
A thought provoking poem. I liked the third stanza particular. We all leave a mark. The Buddhists say life is like flying through a lighted window with darkness on either side-all we have to do is try not to crack it-I added the cracking bit myself tut tut.
reply by the author on 19-Dec-2010
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A thought provoking poem. I liked the third stanza particular. We all leave a mark. The Buddhists say life is like flying through a lighted window with darkness on either side-all we have to do is try not to crack it-I added the cracking bit myself tut tut.
Comment Written 12-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 19-Dec-2010
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Thank you for your good and interesting review. I really appreciate it. Could you perhaps explain a little the last sentence to me if you will? Sarah
Comment from bowls
A very pleasant poem both in message and sound. The rhythm and rhyme scheme are extremely pleasing to the ear, and the words present a truly lovely message. I think the first two lines set the tone really nicely. The many images of light - "golden treasure", "golden strand","sunshine", further enhance your beautiful message.In the second stanza "laying" should be "lying".
reply by the author on 19-Dec-2010
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A very pleasant poem both in message and sound. The rhythm and rhyme scheme are extremely pleasing to the ear, and the words present a truly lovely message. I think the first two lines set the tone really nicely. The many images of light - "golden treasure", "golden strand","sunshine", further enhance your beautiful message.In the second stanza "laying" should be "lying".
Comment Written 12-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 19-Dec-2010
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Thank you so much for your beautiful review on my poem, I also greatly appreciate your comment on changing "laying" should be "lying" which I did. Sarah
