The Legend Of Old Punkin'
Moonshine in bottles and in the sky.21 total reviews
Comment from knowledge
"Let me tell a story, I kin tell it all, 'bout a mountain boy who ran illegal alcohol..." Well written. May you do well on the contest.
Thank You My Friend,
Knowledge
reply by the author on 06-Aug-2010
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"Let me tell a story, I kin tell it all, 'bout a mountain boy who ran illegal alcohol..." Well written. May you do well on the contest.
Thank You My Friend,
Knowledge
Comment Written 06-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 06-Aug-2010
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hi there, thank you! for taking the time to read this, and to review for me too. I appreciate. Susan
Comment from CALLAHANMR
Hi Susan:)
What a sad end for Old Punkin and the lads. I know what that big DeSoto V/8 sounded like. I put one in a souped up 1940 Pontiac coupe back in my high school, hot rod days. I think in that light weight body, it might have left even Old Punkin in the dust. I never blew a tire, but if I had, I wouldn't be smiling so big as I read your story and reminisce.
This makes a great campfire story that must be more exciting and scary each time it's told.
Good luck in the contest,
Roger
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2010
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Hi Susan:)
What a sad end for Old Punkin and the lads. I know what that big DeSoto V/8 sounded like. I put one in a souped up 1940 Pontiac coupe back in my high school, hot rod days. I think in that light weight body, it might have left even Old Punkin in the dust. I never blew a tire, but if I had, I wouldn't be smiling so big as I read your story and reminisce.
This makes a great campfire story that must be more exciting and scary each time it's told.
Good luck in the contest,
Roger
Comment Written 05-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2010
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Oh neat! I wish I could see a picture of your old Pontiac! We have had several old vehicles over the years, that if we owned them now, would make us rich. The best being one of 500 MachI Mustangs, a Shelby 428 special edition, Cobra. It is valued today at over 175K...we sold it to a horse trader for 750.oo. I am sick just remembering it. Oh well. It's always great to hear from you Roger. Thanks for this review, and sharing about your cars too! Wow. Susan
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Hi Susan:)
I rolled that car on an icy road when it was going about thirty-five. I I hadn't tried to miss a fence it would just have had a few scratches. We patched it up, but it was never the same.
It did give me some fond memories. When I rolled it I had seven girls in the old buggy. Believe it or not, one was the sheriff's daughter, one was the mayor's daughter and a third was the daughter of a Kansas Highway patrolman. I didn't even get a ticket. thank God we were packed too tight to get hurt. Lol.
Roger
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This is great, we had some fun with our mustang, only not like that. I once drove from Lafayette to Columbus Indiana which is 160 miles or so, and my average speed that day was 99mph. I ran neck and neck down I-65 with a cute blonde guy in a red '66 Mustang. It was a blast. We parted company at the Louisville Exit, and I made it home in just over an hour and 15 minutes. (Back then, there were not cops on every corner)! Or boy oh boy. This is one of my favorite memories. I am glad you and your friends were not hurt. What fun to remember tho! You had connections! This HELPS! ") Ha. BUT SEVEN girls?????????? Wow. You should have heard my husband just now! HE was dieing with laughter. Thanks Roger!! :) Susan
Comment from Shirley McLain
Good story and would make the Dukes proud. It read well and kept the action going to the end. You have the intrigue with a touch of spooky. Good job.
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2010
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Good story and would make the Dukes proud. It read well and kept the action going to the end. You have the intrigue with a touch of spooky. Good job.
Comment Written 05-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2010
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Well thank you very much Texas~ I am happy you liked this, it was a fun story. Good to hear from you! Susan
Comment from jester97
trite and hackneyed. no excitement. the dialogue grated on my nerves, maybe I'm just not tuned to redneck hillbilly stylin's. If I had to sit through this at a campfire I'd fall asleep and probably fall into the fire and kill myself.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2010
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trite and hackneyed. no excitement. the dialogue grated on my nerves, maybe I'm just not tuned to redneck hillbilly stylin's. If I had to sit through this at a campfire I'd fall asleep and probably fall into the fire and kill myself.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 05-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2010
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Now I see what you really are. You should not be here. Fan Story does not support people like you.
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Go do that, please.
Comment from despiser
Realist
Can't really make any spag comments because of the dialect other than out'ta, isn't it just outta? Small potatoes. One thing i noticed is that the style seem to fade in and out at times. Well told tale overall
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2010
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Realist
Can't really make any spag comments because of the dialect other than out'ta, isn't it just outta? Small potatoes. One thing i noticed is that the style seem to fade in and out at times. Well told tale overall
Comment Written 05-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2010
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Hi Despiser...please don't despise me? lol...I thank you for this help...I will go back and see what I can do about it...I think you are so right. I appreciate!!! ") Susan
Comment from Ted T
Hi Susan :)
That wasn't so hard now was it? You turned it around and wrote a good tale after all.
I especially liked the ending.
Keep at it.
Ted
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2010
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Hi Susan :)
That wasn't so hard now was it? You turned it around and wrote a good tale after all.
I especially liked the ending.
Keep at it.
Ted
Comment Written 05-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2010
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Well, with your help and strict guidance! ") See, you are a wonderful helper Ted. I am learning not only to watch the technical things, but how to be humble I hope. Thank you again. It is great to hear from you. ") Susan
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Okay, glad I helped.
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you have, immensely. S. ")
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My Pleasure :)
Comment from adewpearl
I think if this were told as a campfire story it would have to have the first part of the story told with it or at least explained a bit more, rather than its being a stand alone story, but other than that, it is a captivating ending to your larger story. You have an engaging narrative style and great, natural-sounding dialogue as well as an ability to draw the reader into the grim plot. Brooke
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2010
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I think if this were told as a campfire story it would have to have the first part of the story told with it or at least explained a bit more, rather than its being a stand alone story, but other than that, it is a captivating ending to your larger story. You have an engaging narrative style and great, natural-sounding dialogue as well as an ability to draw the reader into the grim plot. Brooke
Comment Written 05-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2010
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Hi Brooke, yes, it was long, and three parts. I did actually think about that, but didn't know if I should do that or not? Should I change it? I respect your help a great deal, thank you so much!! Susan
Comment from sweetwoodjax
this is very well written with good form, good flow, good storyline, i enjoyed reading this. my grandfather and his brother were moonshiners that were run out of florida and moved to georgia. my father said my grandfather ran a still until world war 2 because he couldn't get the sugar. he never told the family where the still was. good luck in the contest
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2010
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this is very well written with good form, good flow, good storyline, i enjoyed reading this. my grandfather and his brother were moonshiners that were run out of florida and moved to georgia. my father said my grandfather ran a still until world war 2 because he couldn't get the sugar. he never told the family where the still was. good luck in the contest
Comment Written 05-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2010
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OH WOW! You should write about it!! What a wealth of info you would have. I am so interested in this! Please write us a poem or story! Yes, sugar, copper, all that was unavailable when the war started. Gee, how interesting. Wow. Thank you Sweet. What a neat family history you have!! ") Susan
Comment from Tony_Castro
Well done! It has a nice, oral-history quality to it - some people will quibble over your spelling and grammar but this is one case where it actually works. It adds ambience and atmosphere to your story. It reminded me of all those campfire ghost stories we'd hear when we went camping and your ending captures it nicely. It's almost like listening to ole Uncle Creepy spin one of his unholy yarns...
Five stars, well earned.
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2010
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Well done! It has a nice, oral-history quality to it - some people will quibble over your spelling and grammar but this is one case where it actually works. It adds ambience and atmosphere to your story. It reminded me of all those campfire ghost stories we'd hear when we went camping and your ending captures it nicely. It's almost like listening to ole Uncle Creepy spin one of his unholy yarns...
Five stars, well earned.
Comment Written 05-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2010
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Hi Tony! what a grand and fun review. Thank you. I love this, "ole Uncle Creepy", ha. This is a contest for campfire and tall tales, so I hope I fulfilled the requirement then. Thank you very much, I really appreciate this encouragment!! Susan
Comment from BarnCat
Well done, Susan! Great sense of place and time. Your characters -- including the narrator are well developed and true to regional eccentricities. Good Luck! D
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2010
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Well done, Susan! Great sense of place and time. Your characters -- including the narrator are well developed and true to regional eccentricities. Good Luck! D
Comment Written 05-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2010
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Hi Deb! Thank you very much!! So good to hear from you, and to know you liked this, is wonderful. I just love old trucks!! We used to have two Fords, a '48 and a '50. They had flat-head V-8's, and I sold them one day on a whim, they were getting vandalized, so some older fellow bought them to supposedly restore. I hope he did. I hope you and your brood are happy and well!! HUGS! Susan
