Reviews from

Tantalizing Eyes

Viewing comments for Chapter 36 "Chapter 10; part 1"
Dishonesty VS Love. Which will win?

64 total reviews 
Comment from Mengleoh67
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

I know where it's gonna lead I just hope it leads there before I run out of chapters to catch up on! LOL

This chapter is perfect I think. Excellent pace and rhythm, good strong continuation of the storyline, nice building of emotion. As always great character interaction and dialogue... I must read on!

 Comment Written 20-Apr-2010


reply by the author on 21-Apr-2010
    Wow, wow and more wow. Thank you, I am deeply touched.
Comment from hyway94
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I guess if you thought there was any mistakes everyone showed you where they were. I found none and I think if I had read this when you posted it I wouldn't have found any then.

 Comment Written 16-Mar-2010


reply by the author on 16-Mar-2010
    Thank you for your kind words.
Comment from Juliette Chamberlain
Excellent
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It is nice to see Steven and Leya in a relaxed situation again.
Hopefully, they will get some real peace for a time in order to get their relationship sorted out.
Good chapter. I look forward to reading morre.

Juliette

 Comment Written 08-Mar-2010


reply by the author on 08-Mar-2010
    Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from Ann Smith
Excellent
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I didn't find any mistakes as I read through it and I liked the dialogue and the detail. I especially liked the tenderness between Steven and Leya. It was just a nice back and forth between the two. The walk along the water was nice and the throwing the pebble to give him something to do was good. It was an interesting read with no sags. ann

 Comment Written 07-Mar-2010


reply by the author on 07-Mar-2010
    Thank you for your kind words. I apprecaite them
Comment from Freeflyer
Excellent
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The story moves nicely and it is good that you have these two characters becoming more relaxed around each other.
They will end up together, I am sure.
Keep 'em coming.
Maz.

 Comment Written 07-Mar-2010


reply by the author on 07-Mar-2010
    They may end up together, but there's many hurddles still in their way. Thank you for your review.
Comment from wierdgrace
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This chapter showed emotions in your characters, more than ususal, and it was written in perfect form, the words, the diologue, the ending of this chapter, wow, I loved it, no errors, of course, and no revisions, just wanting for more.

 Comment Written 07-Mar-2010


reply by the author on 07-Mar-2010
    Thank you for your kind words and continued support.
Comment from Savoy8you
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

great dialogue and consistent flow to the chapter. You consistently grab the readers attention and keep me captivated throughout the storyline

(review done by Savoys Mom)

 Comment Written 07-Mar-2010


reply by the author on 07-Mar-2010
    Thank you for your kind words.
Comment from Donna Thompson
Excellent
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great use of dialogue and interactive words with the chapter. I look forward to reading more and appreciate your well thought out writing


 Comment Written 07-Mar-2010


reply by the author on 07-Mar-2010
    Thank you for your review.
Comment from empire76
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

One good thing about this story is that it keep moving along. With Steven having admitted his feelings for Leya, we now await Leya's own feelings developing into love.

-He heard Ralph call him from his office, glanced toward the hallway, then back at Leya. "If you're sure everything's all right, I'll see you at dinner."

This line flows well. You achieve a good description of the action without jumping and it works. Keep that up.

- The hot air brushing her neck caused goose bumps, as she responded, "You noticed?"
She seriously wants to ask him that? LOL. (like: do you see the elephant hiding behind the pole?)

E

 Comment Written 07-Mar-2010


reply by the author on 07-Mar-2010
    Thank you for your kind review. I appreciate your continued support.
Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear
Excellent
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ROMANCE RESUMES!

I liked this part of the fiction. I enjoyed the flow of thoughts, the plot and the expressiveness in conveying the message, nice rejuvenating ending.

 Comment Written 07-Mar-2010


reply by the author on 07-Mar-2010
    Thank you for your kind words.