Reviews from

Tantalizing Eyes

Viewing comments for Chapter 35 "Chapter 9; part three"
Dishonesty VS Love. Which will win?

50 total reviews 
Comment from Mengleoh67
Excellent
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One good thing about being gone and getting so far behind in my reviews is that I at least have a lot of great chapters waiting for me!

Great chapter with continuing character development and great interaction. I almost wanted it longer though with more detail to what went on at the fake safe house and Peggy's arrest... maybe that's just me being blood thirsty.

 Comment Written 20-Apr-2010


reply by the author on 21-Apr-2010
    Wow, I somehow missed these. Wow you really did go back aways, didn't you. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Comment from vandawalker
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This chapter has a lot of info in it. It seems to move slowly. There needs to be more excitement about the set up and the capture.

"reached for door handle" Is this at his house? It's not clear where Steven is. Would it startle him or would he show distrust when Peggy grabs his arm? Maybe interject more of the character's feelings and raactions.

What made Joe set Peggy up? How does he feel about her?

There would be an opportunity for more action at the house on Maple. What did each group see? How did they act? What decisions were made?

The hospital arrest needs more reactions from Peggy and the other officers.

The ending shows good emotion and connection between the two main characters. Thanks for a good read.

 Comment Written 03-Mar-2010


reply by the author on 03-Mar-2010
    If you have read the previous chapters you would know why Joe set Peggy up. This is a romance novel the action is secondary, not the purpose for the novel. Thank you for your review.
Comment from maggieJo
Excellent
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Another look at people giving others caring safe actions or having a
vendetta that seeks revenge or harbors a hatred which casts a shadow on everyone's life around them.

Your writing is very expressive and pulls the reader into the place of the characters actions.

I enjoy each new posting.

maggiejo

 Comment Written 03-Mar-2010


reply by the author on 03-Mar-2010
    Thank you for your review.
reply by maggieJo on 03-Mar-2010
    Your very welcome. mj
Comment from CKLA
Excellent
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Once again, a great chapter. You continue to move the story along at a comfortable pace for the reader. Looking forward to reading more.

Collette

 Comment Written 02-Mar-2010


reply by the author on 03-Mar-2010
    Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from RazberryBullet
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Oooo! A nice little trap for Peggy!--"Sure there's a concern about the lack of security for those seven hours, but we can't do anything about it."

I'm glad Peggy's out of the picture--maybe.

Well done!

 Comment Written 02-Mar-2010


reply by the author on 02-Mar-2010
    We will see Peggy again. Thank you for your review.
Comment from Frank Fiction
Excellent
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This is the first work of yours I have read, so I do not know everything. But what I have read I enjoyed. It made me want to read on and learn more about what was happening. Thank you.

 Comment Written 02-Mar-2010


reply by the author on 02-Mar-2010
    Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from bookishfabler
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I'm slightly confused by this arrest. I know Pegggy is jealous, but why is she being arrested for simply peeking in on Leya? Only found one nit.


His heart sank when she didn't answer immediately answer.

(only one 'answer is necessary. )

great job
hugs
book

 Comment Written 02-Mar-2010


reply by the author on 02-Mar-2010
    I thought I deleted that answer. I must have forgot to save. Peggy was arrested because she leaked the information to the drug cartel. That's why they showed up at the house. Thank you for the review.
Comment from Belinda
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It is interesting how Steven pretends to make a phone call, and unbelievable what Peggy can do for love. Btw you might want to delete an 'answer' from the following:
"His heart sank when she didn't answer immediately answer."

 Comment Written 02-Mar-2010


reply by the author on 02-Mar-2010
    I took care of the answer issue. Thank you for your review.
Comment from blueberries12
Excellent
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I loved reading your story! I think you captured love in a really different light with the creative use of suspense, plot and literary devices. A great read! Keep up the good work!

 Comment Written 02-Mar-2010


reply by the author on 02-Mar-2010
    I don't understand if you, "I loved reading your story!" & "A great read! Keep up the good work!" Why you gave me four stars, please explain.
Comment from Kashif Ali Abbas
Excellent
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I loved reading it. The dialogues are very natural and the writing style is brilliant. The characters move in such relevance with the story. Peggy was my pick as a character.
A good story and very well presented.

K

 Comment Written 01-Mar-2010


reply by the author on 01-Mar-2010
    Thank you for your kind words.