Reviews from

Sundays with you

To my husband Dave.

53 total reviews 
Comment from Earthwriter
Excellent
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sundays give us time to regroup i really liked the way you presented this piece very free flowing and unencumbered excellent job

 Comment Written 02-Jun-2008


reply by the author on 02-Jun-2008
    Thank you for the great review, fellow writer Earthwriter.
Comment from FrankieT
Excellent
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amanda, a very lovely well written sdtory and reflection about you and your husband. It had a nice feeling running throught it; a comfortable read. :o)

FrankieT

 Comment Written 02-Jun-2008


reply by the author on 02-Jun-2008
    Thank you FrankieT. It's nice to hear from you. Gracias.
Comment from HornHighYo
Excellent
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Very nice piece. Short and sweet, it's almost more a poem than short story. I would guess that every reader would equate their own "happy place" when reading this. I liked your phrase "mumble-gumble." Thanks for sharing and good luck with the puzzle next week. ;-)

 Comment Written 02-Jun-2008


reply by the author on 02-Jun-2008
    Thank you, HornHighYo. I much appreciate your review and the good wishes for the puzzle. Have a lovely day.
Comment from penelope
Excellent
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I can tell you like playing with words and enjoyed your well-written piece of writing, Amada. You've created a nice setting, showing your appreciation of the companionship and coziness of togetherness. I certainly enjoyed it! Penelope

 Comment Written 02-Jun-2008


reply by the author on 02-Jun-2008
    Thank you Penelope. I really appreciate your time reading it and commenting on it.
Comment from ladybird
Excellent
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I can tell that you wrote this from the heart. Also it was very cleverly done, even if it did take my breathe away slightly with it's momentum. An insight into what a marriage is all about. Well done.

 Comment Written 02-Jun-2008


reply by the author on 02-Jun-2008
    Thank you for reading and the wise and touching comments. I so appreciate it ladbird.
Comment from William Walz
Excellent
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beautiful and well-written, with great, evocative language. you have a wonderful writing style that is at once elegant yet easy to follow. sounds as if you've got it all, except for that doggoned telephone

 Comment Written 02-Jun-2008


reply by the author on 02-Jun-2008
    Oh yeah, it took me lots of heartbreaks to reach this lovely place...that's why I can appreciate the most now. Thank you for the great comments on my writing style. I hope to read some of your work as well. Have a nice day dear wwwalzes.
Comment from Teri7
Excellent
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This is a very good and interesting read you have done. It sounds like you have the perfect marriage with each other. Great job. Hugs, Teri

 Comment Written 02-Jun-2008


reply by the author on 02-Jun-2008
    Thank you Teri7. I appreciate your support to my work.
Comment from eraserlynch
Excellent
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Lovely story and thank you for sharing this private inspiration. If this is what comes from his inspiration maybe you should write about him some more. Lovely writing.

 Comment Written 02-Jun-2008


reply by the author on 02-Jun-2008
    Thank you for your great review. I remember your advice: to write more even if it wasn't perfect. I appreciate the encouragement, fellow writer eraserlynch.
Comment from GCMaxwell
Excellent
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You have given the reader a window into your own home. I like it. It reads like journal entry. You might try re-adapting it as free verse poetry.

 Comment Written 01-Jun-2008


reply by the author on 02-Jun-2008
    Thank you GCMaxwell for the great review.
Comment from Buctar
Excellent
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Amanda:

An enjoyable read.

I have a few observations/recommendations for you to consider--or not. See what you think.

Sunday at home, with you...(.) (When ellipses close out a sentence, you should include the ending punctuation as well. In this case, there should be another period.)

dare to mumble-GUMBLE a song. (Is this the right word or did you mean grumble?)

sways away in spite OF my wishes (I think you left the word OF out.)

foundations in spite OF our feeble feet of clay (I think you left the word OF out.)

the beginning of our now ten year old fairy tale. (ten-year-old is hyphenated.)

I hope this helps.)

Bill

 Comment Written 01-Jun-2008


reply by the author on 01-Jun-2008
    Thank you Bill for the review and the suggestions for improvement. I followed them and it reads much better.