The New Commandments
If I were God39 total reviews
Comment from Firefly54
That was a lot to read for 2 cents... but I haven't laughed so much all week! Mind, you possibly had to be English to appreciate some of it! Thanks for sharing!
reply by the author on 08-Dec-2008
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That was a lot to read for 2 cents... but I haven't laughed so much all week! Mind, you possibly had to be English to appreciate some of it! Thanks for sharing!
Comment Written 07-Dec-2008
reply by the author on 08-Dec-2008
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Well, I'm definitely English. Glad you liked it, and thanks for the generous review
Comment from Summer Falls
I have tears in my eyes, and they are not generated from sadness... am still laughing.
You certainly know how to reach the many of us that wish someone would to punish inconsiderate people for thier "sins"
The many things you hit upon in your writing was honest and actually valid.
pear shaped..loved the visual of mankind making every thing sink and settle in the backside of things.
Eden project, and how 10 commandments no longer cover our talent for sinning is where my peals of laughter began--and never stopped until I took a breath and read on, only to start laughing once again.
Your piece was very well written, twisting laughter out of everyday bits of aggravation.
You played an imaginary god, a comical god that has a thunderbolt and knows how to use it.
I love your voice. You make friends with the reader and draw them over to sip your cup of words sweetened with truth and softened with comedy.
I really cannot think of one thing I would change about your wonderful contest entry.
I need to get a tissue now. Just thinking about the lycra shorts are making me weep with laughter once again. Kudos to you snodlander!
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2008
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I have tears in my eyes, and they are not generated from sadness... am still laughing.
You certainly know how to reach the many of us that wish someone would to punish inconsiderate people for thier "sins"
The many things you hit upon in your writing was honest and actually valid.
pear shaped..loved the visual of mankind making every thing sink and settle in the backside of things.
Eden project, and how 10 commandments no longer cover our talent for sinning is where my peals of laughter began--and never stopped until I took a breath and read on, only to start laughing once again.
Your piece was very well written, twisting laughter out of everyday bits of aggravation.
You played an imaginary god, a comical god that has a thunderbolt and knows how to use it.
I love your voice. You make friends with the reader and draw them over to sip your cup of words sweetened with truth and softened with comedy.
I really cannot think of one thing I would change about your wonderful contest entry.
I need to get a tissue now. Just thinking about the lycra shorts are making me weep with laughter once again. Kudos to you snodlander!
Comment Written 26-Oct-2008
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2008
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You're very kind. I'm afraid I can't claim the credit for 'pear-shaped', it's a common expression in the UK. I'm flattered (and a little embarrassed) by your effusive praise. Thank you for your review and the 6.
Comment from pitmanette
You are the best. I also subscribe to your commandments. The phone one? A client actually sat in the interview chair before my desk while she waited for her ride, necessating that all the other interviewees had to wait for her to vacate, and told a great number of her friends and family every little thing that had happened to her at the top of her lungs. My telephone rang, and when I answered it-my job! she actually told me to be quiet because she was on the phone!
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2008
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You are the best. I also subscribe to your commandments. The phone one? A client actually sat in the interview chair before my desk while she waited for her ride, necessating that all the other interviewees had to wait for her to vacate, and told a great number of her friends and family every little thing that had happened to her at the top of her lungs. My telephone rang, and when I answered it-my job! she actually told me to be quiet because she was on the phone!
Comment Written 15-Sep-2008
reply by the author on 16-Sep-2008
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I detest the things. I broke my phone, and when Er Indoors insisted I replace it 6 months later, I had no missed messages, a fact I am proud of. I'm glad you liked it, and thank you for your review and generous 6
Comment from Writer191
Only one problem that I can see; way to much common sense to be taken seriously. But it sure is fun to dream. It's probably unfortunate, but we suffer from all the same inconsiderates here in the States. Still, if you DO find a way, I would love to see that English commandment enforced. Just a thought.
Thanks,
Jim
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2008
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Only one problem that I can see; way to much common sense to be taken seriously. But it sure is fun to dream. It's probably unfortunate, but we suffer from all the same inconsiderates here in the States. Still, if you DO find a way, I would love to see that English commandment enforced. Just a thought.
Thanks,
Jim
Comment Written 12-Sep-2008
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2008
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You're very kind, thank you.
Comment from Louise Michelle
Bravo! You thoroughly entertained me with your wit and excellent writing. I enjoyed the entire piece, so it's hard to decide which lines I especially enjoyed.
I'm putting myself on your fan list; however, I can't promise to read and critique everything FS sends my way. I will, however, be on the lookout for short, humerous pieces.
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2008
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Bravo! You thoroughly entertained me with your wit and excellent writing. I enjoyed the entire piece, so it's hard to decide which lines I especially enjoyed.
I'm putting myself on your fan list; however, I can't promise to read and critique everything FS sends my way. I will, however, be on the lookout for short, humerous pieces.
Comment Written 29-Aug-2008
reply by the author on 29-Aug-2008
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Short humorous pieces eh? (no, must resist)
Thanks for your review. I'm glad you liked it.
Comment from SiscoMolina
Brilliant!! I laughed at several spots and if it was a celestial elction year you would get my vote all the way from across the pond.
reply by the author on 22-Jul-2008
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Brilliant!! I laughed at several spots and if it was a celestial elction year you would get my vote all the way from across the pond.
Comment Written 22-Jul-2008
reply by the author on 22-Jul-2008
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Well, your reward will be great, should I achieve that goal. Great biog on your profile, BTW.
Thanks for your praise.
Comment from maggieJo
You have a great sense of humor--and by George--you kept it clean and respectful of our God. I love this, I laughed all the way through, and now I'm in a good mood...this spell six stars. Give us more you delighful Englisher! My mum was English--and southern. Picture an Englisher with a southern accent. :-)
maggiejo
reply by the author on 14-Jul-2008
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You have a great sense of humor--and by George--you kept it clean and respectful of our God. I love this, I laughed all the way through, and now I'm in a good mood...this spell six stars. Give us more you delighful Englisher! My mum was English--and southern. Picture an Englisher with a southern accent. :-)
maggiejo
Comment Written 14-Jul-2008
reply by the author on 14-Jul-2008
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I am also English and have a southern accent - about 30 miles south of London, in fact.
Thanks for your generous review. I'm glad you liked it
Comment from Tom OBrien
Well done as usual. I too have a serious problem with people who wait ahead of you in line for 10 or 15 minutes and then when it's their turn they are clueless. Have to hunt for their check book, don't know what day it is, have to borrow a pen to write the damn check. Don't know if their plastic is credit or debit. "Visa!" A young lass recently replied brightly when asked if it was a debit or credit card.
It's a darn good thing I wasn't buying ball bats or shovel handles that day!!
Write on dude!
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2008
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Well done as usual. I too have a serious problem with people who wait ahead of you in line for 10 or 15 minutes and then when it's their turn they are clueless. Have to hunt for their check book, don't know what day it is, have to borrow a pen to write the damn check. Don't know if their plastic is credit or debit. "Visa!" A young lass recently replied brightly when asked if it was a debit or credit card.
It's a darn good thing I wasn't buying ball bats or shovel handles that day!!
Write on dude!
Comment Written 21-Jan-2008
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2008
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Thank you (as usual). I'm glad I'm not the only one.
Comment from Susan E. Pennycuff
oh my snodlander (lol) this was so dang funny, and yet in a wierd way was almost serious because some folks take some of these things so serious as though they were something that perhaps should be a commandment and would bite your head off if it were happening in real life. I think that is what makes this so funny, the way you addressed it, just brings it all to the forefront and shows how l petty society has become when there are way more important issues going on around us. Excellent write and I am sure you are going to be a contender in this contest, well done.
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2008
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oh my snodlander (lol) this was so dang funny, and yet in a wierd way was almost serious because some folks take some of these things so serious as though they were something that perhaps should be a commandment and would bite your head off if it were happening in real life. I think that is what makes this so funny, the way you addressed it, just brings it all to the forefront and shows how l petty society has become when there are way more important issues going on around us. Excellent write and I am sure you are going to be a contender in this contest, well done.
Comment Written 20-Jan-2008
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2008
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You're very kind. Thank you
Comment from Lady & Louis
Godlander, I mean snodlander, this is one of the funniest pieces I've read on FS for ages. I love those new commandments - especially the phone and ipod related ones. I spend some three hours on the train every working day and such commandments (with lightning-bolt reinforcement) are sorely needed!
The whole piece was a delight to read; there's not a single thing to suggest, nary a spag, and that ending is perfect.
Good luck in the contest, this deserves to win!
LL :)))
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2008
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Godlander, I mean snodlander, this is one of the funniest pieces I've read on FS for ages. I love those new commandments - especially the phone and ipod related ones. I spend some three hours on the train every working day and such commandments (with lightning-bolt reinforcement) are sorely needed!
The whole piece was a delight to read; there's not a single thing to suggest, nary a spag, and that ending is perfect.
Good luck in the contest, this deserves to win!
LL :)))
Comment Written 20-Jan-2008
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2008
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You're very kind, thank you for your review and the 6
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My pleasure!
