Poetry, Dreams In Motion.
Viewing comments for Chapter 40 "Child Within"A collection of poetry.
19 total reviews
Comment from healfromwithin
This piece was sad to read, but well done. I liked the second stanza where she begins to hope of change.
I saw no significant corrections to be made.
Good job. ~healfromwithin
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2007
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This piece was sad to read, but well done. I liked the second stanza where she begins to hope of change.
I saw no significant corrections to be made.
Good job. ~healfromwithin
Comment Written 18-Jul-2007
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2007
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Yes, very sad, but thought provoking. I am glad that you found it a good read :-)
Comment from SpoiledWrott10
Very thought provoking. Your comments are perfect. You wrote this with emotion from your heart and it's worth reading again .Thank you for sharing...... Your poet friend SpoiledWrott10
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2007
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Very thought provoking. Your comments are perfect. You wrote this with emotion from your heart and it's worth reading again .Thank you for sharing...... Your poet friend SpoiledWrott10
Comment Written 17-Jul-2007
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2007
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Thank you... I wanted to tap into the inner most feelings of a woman lost and trying to come to grips with what was lost. I am glad that you found it appealing enough to read again :-)
Comment from DawningOne
This was such an emotional poem. It was sad and yet it did build hope.
It was my pleasure to read and review this well-written piece of poetry.
God bless you.
Much love,
Dawn
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2007
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This was such an emotional poem. It was sad and yet it did build hope.
It was my pleasure to read and review this well-written piece of poetry.
God bless you.
Much love,
Dawn
Comment Written 17-Jul-2007
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2007
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Thank you so much for taking the time to read and review my work :-)
Comment from milushka
I am for the verse to fly whichever way.
This is a heart-breaking accout of a child-abuse if I understand.
Never, have I come acress it so often than here on the site.
A constant reminder that it is happening.
Love,
Mila
reply by the author on 17-Jul-2007
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I am for the verse to fly whichever way.
This is a heart-breaking accout of a child-abuse if I understand.
Never, have I come acress it so often than here on the site.
A constant reminder that it is happening.
Love,
Mila
Comment Written 17-Jul-2007
reply by the author on 17-Jul-2007
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Yes, it is and the struggle that she must face daily to find her way back to who she once was. Thank you for taking the time to read and review my poem :-D
You are so welcome.
Mila
Comment from Lance29
The poem does what is looks like it is supposed to do - simply tell the story in the way the narrator wants to tell it - by just writing it. Very desciptive and easy to read, despite the lack of any form. Gret job.
Lance
reply by the author on 17-Jul-2007
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The poem does what is looks like it is supposed to do - simply tell the story in the way the narrator wants to tell it - by just writing it. Very desciptive and easy to read, despite the lack of any form. Gret job.
Lance
Comment Written 17-Jul-2007
reply by the author on 17-Jul-2007
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Thank you, Lance, for taking the time to read and review my poem. I'm glad that, despite the lack of form, you found it easy to read and understand.
Comment from Broken Fingers
Hi Ricouard
I too am a fan of Mr Poe. I think this has much of his music too it. Although the pedant in Poe may have picked up on one or two spelling errors. I recognise the emotions within the poem and that line between madness and reason, restraint and the wild hearts that lie within.
Powerful stuff, and very readable.
Gavin
reply by the author on 17-Jul-2007
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Hi Ricouard
I too am a fan of Mr Poe. I think this has much of his music too it. Although the pedant in Poe may have picked up on one or two spelling errors. I recognise the emotions within the poem and that line between madness and reason, restraint and the wild hearts that lie within.
Powerful stuff, and very readable.
Gavin
Comment Written 17-Jul-2007
reply by the author on 17-Jul-2007
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Thank you for taking the time to read and review my work. Your comments brought a smile to my day :-D
Comment from Kentucky Sweet Pea
Well it does flow, and it is very well constructed and written. Your meaning is clear and although, sad, it contains hints of the possibilities for this woman---that she might find a way back to that part of herself, because she desires it so.
I enjoyed it very much and found nothing to change. I have a poem called "Inner Child Delights" posted here as part of a multi-authored book titled "The Child Within." Mine isn't so melancholy, but a lot of the same type of terminology, etc. was used in that piece. Your poem's lady should read that one, maybe it would help her...
Great work!
Penny
reply by the author on 17-Jul-2007
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Well it does flow, and it is very well constructed and written. Your meaning is clear and although, sad, it contains hints of the possibilities for this woman---that she might find a way back to that part of herself, because she desires it so.
I enjoyed it very much and found nothing to change. I have a poem called "Inner Child Delights" posted here as part of a multi-authored book titled "The Child Within." Mine isn't so melancholy, but a lot of the same type of terminology, etc. was used in that piece. Your poem's lady should read that one, maybe it would help her...
Great work!
Penny
Comment Written 17-Jul-2007
reply by the author on 17-Jul-2007
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Thank you for taking the time to read and review my work. I am thrilled that you were able to catch the full meaning of this piece. She struggles to fight and win back the innocence, life, and love she needs to continue along, yet clings to the hope she will succeed.
Comment from Moira's Amethyst
"She walks upon rivers of rainbowed tears
and touches the bitter cold of a frozen heart-"
From the jump I knew it would be great read. And sure enough you hadn't let down. I thouroughly enjoyed this piece. The flow was great and you've earned five stars!
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2007
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"She walks upon rivers of rainbowed tears
and touches the bitter cold of a frozen heart-"
From the jump I knew it would be great read. And sure enough you hadn't let down. I thouroughly enjoyed this piece. The flow was great and you've earned five stars!
Comment Written 16-Jul-2007
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2007
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Well, thank you very much! I am glad that you enjoyed it :-D
Comment from cecil
Oh my, two in a row.
Very vivid imagery from this piece.
Alot of strong emotional thoughts come through this work.
Pain upon pain of trust lost in childhood...how sad.
A time for healing and a life regained.
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2007
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Oh my, two in a row.
Very vivid imagery from this piece.
Alot of strong emotional thoughts come through this work.
Pain upon pain of trust lost in childhood...how sad.
A time for healing and a life regained.
Comment Written 16-Jul-2007
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2007
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Ohhh thank you so much for your wonderful review and comments :-D You captured the meanings of my poem so clearly!
Thank you again!
Comment from Trena One Who Cares
Hi Ric this is a very well written prose and has a great story line and delivered with prefect words. The flow of the story is quit unique and is a must to be written. Good writing. Trena
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2007
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Hi Ric this is a very well written prose and has a great story line and delivered with prefect words. The flow of the story is quit unique and is a must to be written. Good writing. Trena
Comment Written 16-Jul-2007
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2007
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Thank you very much for your kind comments! I am glad that you were able to follow the meaning and enjoy the read :-)
