The Little Black Book
Grace and her two grandchildren go on a treasure hunt.7 total reviews
Comment from Wayne Fowler
Very interesting. Good entry for the contest.
"He's going too boys. - Needs a comma after 'too'.
The trip from Denver to Murdo ... This sentence could use a couple commas. Maybe after 'hours' and 'tedious'.
Best wishes.
reply by the author on 15-Mar-2024
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Very interesting. Good entry for the contest.
"He's going too boys. - Needs a comma after 'too'.
The trip from Denver to Murdo ... This sentence could use a couple commas. Maybe after 'hours' and 'tedious'.
Best wishes.
Comment Written 15-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 15-Mar-2024
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Thank you Wayne. I must admit I'm not a pro when it comes to writing.
Comment from Begin Again
A great beginning as Grace takes the boys on an adventure. By the looks of Eldon, they could find themselves in trouble as well as they search for the treasure.
Smiles, Carol
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2024
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A great beginning as Grace takes the boys on an adventure. By the looks of Eldon, they could find themselves in trouble as well as they search for the treasure.
Smiles, Carol
Comment Written 14-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2024
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Thank you so much.
Comment from royowen
Ah a rumoured treasure, that will always suck folks in, especially if it was from an ancestor, the trouble with valuable things that will draw you in, but really they are very much false friends, well done, good job, an excellent post, blessings,Roy
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2024
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Ah a rumoured treasure, that will always suck folks in, especially if it was from an ancestor, the trouble with valuable things that will draw you in, but really they are very much false friends, well done, good job, an excellent post, blessings,Roy
Comment Written 13-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2024
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Of course! But what else awaits them? Usually more of an adventure.
Thank you Roy!
Comment from CornishChick
I really, really like this story. At 69 years old, I can relate to a lot of it! Only suggestions are: It runs a bit passive at points and you definitely want the last line to SHOW Grace's nervousness, not TELL it! Great job!
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2024
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I really, really like this story. At 69 years old, I can relate to a lot of it! Only suggestions are: It runs a bit passive at points and you definitely want the last line to SHOW Grace's nervousness, not TELL it! Great job!
Comment Written 13-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 14-Mar-2024
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Thank you. I will definitely rethink that!
Comment from E. Powers
This is a great chapter and I'm totally pulled in. I very much want to know what happens next for these three characters and whether or not they find the treasure.
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2024
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This is a great chapter and I'm totally pulled in. I very much want to know what happens next for these three characters and whether or not they find the treasure.
Comment Written 13-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2024
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Thank you SO much for your great review. I appreciate it.
Comment from patcelaw
This is an excellent right, and it peaked my interest very much to be able to read it. I wish you the very best with the book and I think I am going to really enjoy your book as you presented to us. Patricia .
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2024
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This is an excellent right, and it peaked my interest very much to be able to read it. I wish you the very best with the book and I think I am going to really enjoy your book as you presented to us. Patricia .
Comment Written 13-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2024
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Thank you SO much Patricia. I appreciate your review.
Comment from Alexandra Trovato
This is an interesting and intriguing first book chapter . You use good imagery abd full descriptions to carry the story along. It is also relatable and has authentic dialogues. Thank you for sharing this.
Best wishes,
Alex
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2024
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This is an interesting and intriguing first book chapter . You use good imagery abd full descriptions to carry the story along. It is also relatable and has authentic dialogues. Thank you for sharing this.
Best wishes,
Alex
Comment Written 13-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2024
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Thank you so much Alexandra!
