Barnyard Philosophy
It's good to have a fresh point ov view.2 total reviews
Comment from Yusita
This was great! Haha. I thoroughly enjoyed it. Overall, it was well-written and engrossing. I loved the clever use of all those "barnyard" sayings. There were a couple typos I noticed. Like in this sentence: "Billy, then, please raise your hand if you with to speak." It should be "wish", not "with". Also, there was one place where I think something is missing because the connection is lost. It's between these two parts:
Billy raised his hand again, and the professor acknowledged him with a nod.
"That's a good observation, Billy, but say you did pick that apple and bit into it and found thee was no worm. Just a delightful taste. You make a choice, and sometimes there's a worm and sometimes just a delightful satisfaction. You have learned from your choices a lot about yourself and that apple tree."
I think we're missing the part where Billy gives the observation. Nonetheless, this was great!
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2024
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This was great! Haha. I thoroughly enjoyed it. Overall, it was well-written and engrossing. I loved the clever use of all those "barnyard" sayings. There were a couple typos I noticed. Like in this sentence: "Billy, then, please raise your hand if you with to speak." It should be "wish", not "with". Also, there was one place where I think something is missing because the connection is lost. It's between these two parts:
Billy raised his hand again, and the professor acknowledged him with a nod.
"That's a good observation, Billy, but say you did pick that apple and bit into it and found thee was no worm. Just a delightful taste. You make a choice, and sometimes there's a worm and sometimes just a delightful satisfaction. You have learned from your choices a lot about yourself and that apple tree."
I think we're missing the part where Billy gives the observation. Nonetheless, this was great!
Comment Written 16-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2024
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Thanks for the review and corrections.
Comment from Julie Helms
What a good portrayal of how intellects and academics tend to use large vocabulary to describe basic ideas, but they sound fancier! I think more of those students will understand Billy than the professor.
A couple suggestions for you:
1.could lead to as deeper understanding (a deeper)?
2.Billy raised his hand again, and the professor acknowledged him with a nod.
"That's a good observation, Billy, but say you did pick that apple (Was there supposed to be a comment from Billy in between there?)
I enjoyed your story. Thanks for sharing! Julie
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2024
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What a good portrayal of how intellects and academics tend to use large vocabulary to describe basic ideas, but they sound fancier! I think more of those students will understand Billy than the professor.
A couple suggestions for you:
1.could lead to as deeper understanding (a deeper)?
2.Billy raised his hand again, and the professor acknowledged him with a nod.
"That's a good observation, Billy, but say you did pick that apple (Was there supposed to be a comment from Billy in between there?)
I enjoyed your story. Thanks for sharing! Julie
Comment Written 14-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2024
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Thanks for the review.
