Dreamer #103
open for interpretation3 total reviews
Comment from dragonpoet
Hi B&S
This is an interesting free verse poem that seems to say your art grounds you. That beautifying the world is more important that making money or anything that society says is important.
Keep writing and stay healthy
Good luck in the contest.
Have a great day.
Joan
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Hi B&S
This is an interesting free verse poem that seems to say your art grounds you. That beautifying the world is more important that making money or anything that society says is important.
Keep writing and stay healthy
Good luck in the contest.
Have a great day.
Joan
Comment Written 14-Mar-2024
Comment from Jesse James Doty
This is an excellent poem and as you say open to interpretation. I love the images you create with words and you make good use of the free-form poetic style. I would suggest putting this under poetry instead of fiction since there is a certain category for poetry.
Good luck with the contest. I hope you do well. I don't recognize your pen name so either I missed it or I want to welcome you to Fan Story.
Jesse
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This is an excellent poem and as you say open to interpretation. I love the images you create with words and you make good use of the free-form poetic style. I would suggest putting this under poetry instead of fiction since there is a certain category for poetry.
Good luck with the contest. I hope you do well. I don't recognize your pen name so either I missed it or I want to welcome you to Fan Story.
Jesse
Comment Written 27-Jan-2024
Comment from Frank Malley
As children we live closer to our dreams. The process of living grinds down our expectations and credulousness until it's hard to step free of the existential morass. This poem, "Dreamer," is about the sorts of dreams so richly invigorating in childhood and so difficult to sustain as an adult. I think the poem's message is that we must impose our dreams upon reality, to satisfy our desire for something beautiful, simple, and magical.
As to the poem's design and language: "Dreamer" uses ordinary words in four line stanzas. There are some interesting metaphors, especially in the first stanza. "City lights" standing for human busy-ness; "belly's oven" for appetites; "point on my head" for the endless monologue of intelligence within the consciousness. I'm not sure 'deliver' is the best verb to go with the other two in the last line; it seems kind of business-like where something bigger is needed.
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As children we live closer to our dreams. The process of living grinds down our expectations and credulousness until it's hard to step free of the existential morass. This poem, "Dreamer," is about the sorts of dreams so richly invigorating in childhood and so difficult to sustain as an adult. I think the poem's message is that we must impose our dreams upon reality, to satisfy our desire for something beautiful, simple, and magical.
As to the poem's design and language: "Dreamer" uses ordinary words in four line stanzas. There are some interesting metaphors, especially in the first stanza. "City lights" standing for human busy-ness; "belly's oven" for appetites; "point on my head" for the endless monologue of intelligence within the consciousness. I'm not sure 'deliver' is the best verb to go with the other two in the last line; it seems kind of business-like where something bigger is needed.
Comment Written 27-Jan-2024
