The Embattled Samaritan Part II
a man of faith is tested2 total reviews
Comment from Julie Helms
I really enjoyed this. I don't know what the part one was, but I was able to follow this fine. Good lessons about selling one's soul or integrity. I also enjoyed the world building with the other dimension, and how time worked differently there.
Here are a few typos:
1."...site of these demonic beings"
(I think in this context you mean 'sight')
2."Gamigin begin to move his hands"
(Should be 'began', but you have began three times in this paragraph so should probably find a different word for two of them)
3. "He first thought was to call Emily"
(His first thought)
Thank you for sharing! Julie.
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I really enjoyed this. I don't know what the part one was, but I was able to follow this fine. Good lessons about selling one's soul or integrity. I also enjoyed the world building with the other dimension, and how time worked differently there.
Here are a few typos:
1."...site of these demonic beings"
(I think in this context you mean 'sight')
2."Gamigin begin to move his hands"
(Should be 'began', but you have began three times in this paragraph so should probably find a different word for two of them)
3. "He first thought was to call Emily"
(His first thought)
Thank you for sharing! Julie.
Comment Written 26-Jan-2024
Comment from Janilou
Is this a stand alone work or part of a book? It was a little difficult to follow because it wasn't immediately clear what had happened or why the man had to do these things to hurt others? I see it says part two - perhaps link it to the part one so that the reader has something to reference before reading?
All the best,
Jan
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Is this a stand alone work or part of a book? It was a little difficult to follow because it wasn't immediately clear what had happened or why the man had to do these things to hurt others? I see it says part two - perhaps link it to the part one so that the reader has something to reference before reading?
All the best,
Jan
Comment Written 26-Jan-2024
