Tales of our Times
Viewing comments for Chapter 15 "Retro"Collection of short stories
3 total reviews
Comment from Sanku
I liked the story .After the slow build up of suspense the culprit is an innocent branch of a tree. Calexa reminded me of Alexa.. is she some Ai instrument?
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2024
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I liked the story .After the slow build up of suspense the culprit is an innocent branch of a tree. Calexa reminded me of Alexa.. is she some Ai instrument?
Comment Written 27-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2024
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Yes - tech is impinging in all kinds of places in our lives - thanks for reviewing zanya
Comment from Karen Cherry Threadgill
The story lacked action and realistic response. You usually write really well, but this needs some work, and then I can give you a five. When the rapping started, anyone would have gone to a window and look around, and most would have looked out a peephole if the door had one. As often as the rapping had happened, and the bad weather outside anyone would have looked. She did nothing. And, she uses the cabin for free all the time, but cannot bother herself to even dust strune in the hall? And the name choices for known thins is kinda lame. Use the real names. You can do so much better, I know this because I happily read your work. You can pull out the voodoo doll and start putting the pins in now.
A little editing and it will be great like the rest of your stuff. :-) Karen
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The story lacked action and realistic response. You usually write really well, but this needs some work, and then I can give you a five. When the rapping started, anyone would have gone to a window and look around, and most would have looked out a peephole if the door had one. As often as the rapping had happened, and the bad weather outside anyone would have looked. She did nothing. And, she uses the cabin for free all the time, but cannot bother herself to even dust strune in the hall? And the name choices for known thins is kinda lame. Use the real names. You can do so much better, I know this because I happily read your work. You can pull out the voodoo doll and start putting the pins in now.
A little editing and it will be great like the rest of your stuff. :-) Karen
Comment Written 24-Jan-2024
Comment from patcelaw
The story is very well written for the contest that I wish you the very best in the contest may you have a wonderful day. I enjoyed listening to this stage and it moves along well when it is read aloud. Have a great day and may God bless. Patricia.
reply by the author on 26-Feb-2024
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The story is very well written for the contest that I wish you the very best in the contest may you have a wonderful day. I enjoyed listening to this stage and it moves along well when it is read aloud. Have a great day and may God bless. Patricia.
Comment Written 23-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 26-Feb-2024
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Great review - delighted you enjoyed it zanya
