Red Skeletons
Viewing comments for Chapter 21 "Meet Our Maker"Haunting Poetry for the Darkness in us all
2 total reviews
Comment from PoemsOfDD
This is an expressive mono-rhymed poem. To have loved but not be loved back in the same way - tough and traumatic.
Just a couple of edits, if I may.
Second verse -
The hurt I feel (not They)
Fourth verse -
But tonight, I am sending you to meet our maker (not send)
Best of luck in the competition.
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2023
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This is an expressive mono-rhymed poem. To have loved but not be loved back in the same way - tough and traumatic.
Just a couple of edits, if I may.
Second verse -
The hurt I feel (not They)
Fourth verse -
But tonight, I am sending you to meet our maker (not send)
Best of luck in the competition.
Comment Written 07-Nov-2023
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2023
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Thank you for pointing out the errors and typos. It is one of the reasons we have others read.
Comment from JSD
A couple of typos, Mia. Line 6, 'the'. Last line, maybe should be 'I send you'?
Otherwise this is great. I like the style and the rhyme is excellent. And the story is most effective. Well done.
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2023
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A couple of typos, Mia. Line 6, 'the'. Last line, maybe should be 'I send you'?
Otherwise this is great. I like the style and the rhyme is excellent. And the story is most effective. Well done.
Comment Written 07-Nov-2023
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2023
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I am glad you liked the piece, and thank you for pointing out the typos. The last line was something I toiled with back and forth so I guess when I settled I missed a piece from an old ending. Thank you again.
