Genus passiflora - passion fruit
cocktail - 1 -part 115 total reviews
Comment from Liz O'Neill
The reader will lean forward fill with conjectures: "Lady is listening to the sound of the sea and hides her face in her palms." I love your play on words. This literary techniques carries the account. A good ending.
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The reader will lean forward fill with conjectures: "Lady is listening to the sound of the sea and hides her face in her palms." I love your play on words. This literary techniques carries the account. A good ending.
Comment Written 25-Jul-2023
Comment from JSD
Excellent. And then they get a bit tipsy and dance off into the starlight. A sweet piece and some authentic dialogue. Well done.
John x
"Poetry is the space between words."
reply by the author on 24-Jul-2023
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Excellent. And then they get a bit tipsy and dance off into the starlight. A sweet piece and some authentic dialogue. Well done.
John x
"Poetry is the space between words."
Comment Written 23-Jul-2023
reply by the author on 24-Jul-2023
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Thank you so much Mr. John:) unfortunately she is just ending her marriage:) in the sun:)
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I meant the waiter!
Comment from JT traveller
I enjoyed this. A well written screenplay. Just 2 questions, was the throwing of the wedding ring symbolic and, "Characters:
Lady a woman past her forty,..." was this line deliberate?
You created vivid imagery and I felt I was right there. Well done. A great job.
reply by the author on 24-Jul-2023
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I enjoyed this. A well written screenplay. Just 2 questions, was the throwing of the wedding ring symbolic and, "Characters:
Lady a woman past her forty,..." was this line deliberate?
You created vivid imagery and I felt I was right there. Well done. A great job.
Comment Written 23-Jul-2023
reply by the author on 24-Jul-2023
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Yup she was saying good bye to her marriage by throwing the ring in the ocean, and past forty you got me, Sir?:)
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Past her forty? Was she into her fortieth year of life or older? Love the symbolism of throwing the ring.
Loved the poem, Jacqueline 😊
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Past of course :)
Comment from Bill Schott
This script, Genus passiflora - passion fruit, is a sort of happy and sad tale both. The dialogue between the two seems to follow a reasonable situation.
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2023
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This script, Genus passiflora - passion fruit, is a sort of happy and sad tale both. The dialogue between the two seems to follow a reasonable situation.
Comment Written 22-Jul-2023
reply by the author on 23-Jul-2023
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Ooops suppose to be a script in two parts:) I better go back and edited:)
Comment from Ulla
Hi Iza, this was good fun and it me ade he chuckle in places. I can so identify with this, and the celebration of the end of a relationship. Great writing. Ulla:)))
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2023
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Hi Iza, this was good fun and it me ade he chuckle in places. I can so identify with this, and the celebration of the end of a relationship. Great writing. Ulla:)))
Comment Written 19-Jul-2023
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2023
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I wonder how did you manage to trust again someone. For me is so hard to start all over. I'm just writing about it.
Comment from jmdg1954
Iza,
Well written, my dear. The dialogue was by far, believable and it moved effortlessly between the two.
I wonder if the waiter "got lucky" after cocktails...
One correction-
Then sighting (sighing) takes the glass from the waiter
I felt as if I were on the beach at an adjacent table.
Well done!
John
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Iza,
Well written, my dear. The dialogue was by far, believable and it moved effortlessly between the two.
I wonder if the waiter "got lucky" after cocktails...
One correction-
Then sighting (sighing) takes the glass from the waiter
I felt as if I were on the beach at an adjacent table.
Well done!
John
Comment Written 19-Jul-2023
Comment from barbara.wilkey
I enjoyed reading. It's very creative. My biggest suggestion is that in a play the action, and who's speaking needs to be completely separate from the dialogue, maybe use : or something similar. They often ran together with only a period.
Then sighting takes the glass from the waiter and says: (sighing???)
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I enjoyed reading. It's very creative. My biggest suggestion is that in a play the action, and who's speaking needs to be completely separate from the dialogue, maybe use : or something similar. They often ran together with only a period.
Then sighting takes the glass from the waiter and says: (sighing???)
Comment Written 19-Jul-2023
Comment from patcelaw
I only wish I still had six stars to give you for this particular piece of writing. It is very profound and it makes your soul thinks that once we've lost our me whether it be by by divorce or whether it be by death, we do have to move on in life and live our own lives. This is so beautifully done. Thank you so much for sharing it with us. May God bless you richly Patricia.
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2023
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I only wish I still had six stars to give you for this particular piece of writing. It is very profound and it makes your soul thinks that once we've lost our me whether it be by by divorce or whether it be by death, we do have to move on in life and live our own lives. This is so beautifully done. Thank you so much for sharing it with us. May God bless you richly Patricia.
Comment Written 19-Jul-2023
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2023
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Thank you so much Pat for this review from your heart. It means so much to me. Take care my friend.
Comment from estory
I think you had good attention to detail in the stage direction, I liked how you slipped in that moment when the lady chucks her wedding ring behind the waiter's back. And the confused look on the waiter's face. These little details make the scene come alive. Lots of wit and humor spice up the dialogue. This gal is on the look out for someone better and making her own magic. estory
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2023
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I think you had good attention to detail in the stage direction, I liked how you slipped in that moment when the lady chucks her wedding ring behind the waiter's back. And the confused look on the waiter's face. These little details make the scene come alive. Lots of wit and humor spice up the dialogue. This gal is on the look out for someone better and making her own magic. estory
Comment Written 19-Jul-2023
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2023
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Amen to that:)
Comment from BethShelby
This is classy way to say goodbye to someone that is bringing you down. The script is excellent. You are a good script writer. This wouldn't be based on your life would it.?
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2023
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This is classy way to say goodbye to someone that is bringing you down. The script is excellent. You are a good script writer. This wouldn't be based on your life would it.?
Comment Written 19-Jul-2023
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2023
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Of course it is, I just need to take the trip and toss that ring:) wish me luck in finding the real one:)
