Last Sleep
A homeless man that has found a home32 total reviews
Comment from Wendy G
That is such an insightful poem, and a sad one as you read the thoughts of a homeless person. Your words offer a powerful challenge to those who walk by without noticing or caring. Well done.
Wendy
Typo in second stanza with repetition of "the".
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That is such an insightful poem, and a sad one as you read the thoughts of a homeless person. Your words offer a powerful challenge to those who walk by without noticing or caring. Well done.
Wendy
Typo in second stanza with repetition of "the".
Comment Written 08-Jul-2023
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
This is deeply poignant of course with its tragic ending. You clearly feel strongly about this unforgivable issue of homelessness and your passion is conveyed well through your sentiments. Personally, I would have wished the structure of the verse to be slightly tighter with a more regular rhyming pattern which could have added greater fluency. But your verse comes from the heart and is a very worthy entry for this contest. Good luck Debbie
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This is deeply poignant of course with its tragic ending. You clearly feel strongly about this unforgivable issue of homelessness and your passion is conveyed well through your sentiments. Personally, I would have wished the structure of the verse to be slightly tighter with a more regular rhyming pattern which could have added greater fluency. But your verse comes from the heart and is a very worthy entry for this contest. Good luck Debbie
Comment Written 08-Jul-2023
Comment from royowen
I think we are all only an ace from living on the streets, I have seen thechomeless in the Salvation Army where they are given a free hot meal, they are just ordinary folk, Dow on their luck, thank you for posting this dear Jaqueline, well done, blessings Roy
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I think we are all only an ace from living on the streets, I have seen thechomeless in the Salvation Army where they are given a free hot meal, they are just ordinary folk, Dow on their luck, thank you for posting this dear Jaqueline, well done, blessings Roy
Comment Written 08-Jul-2023
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
Your art choice and words paired perfectly,
Jacqueline. You described a part of living on
the streets well from the POV of those that do.
I understood the ending of finding a home in
Heaven.
If the the [Delete the repeated ;the'[ shelter isn't full, then I'll get a warm bed and a hot meal to eat.
Best wishes in the contest, Jan
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Your art choice and words paired perfectly,
Jacqueline. You described a part of living on
the streets well from the POV of those that do.
I understood the ending of finding a home in
Heaven.
If the the [Delete the repeated ;the'[ shelter isn't full, then I'll get a warm bed and a hot meal to eat.
Best wishes in the contest, Jan
Comment Written 07-Jul-2023
Comment from GWHARGIS
This was truly a sad thing to read. It is the blanket story of what sometimes happens. I met a homeless man one time. Bought him a coffee, a bagel with cream cheese because he said they used to be his favorite. I asked him what his name was and he looked shell shocked. Said nobody ever bothered to learn his name. Beautiful and heartbreaking poem. Gretchen
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This was truly a sad thing to read. It is the blanket story of what sometimes happens. I met a homeless man one time. Bought him a coffee, a bagel with cream cheese because he said they used to be his favorite. I asked him what his name was and he looked shell shocked. Said nobody ever bothered to learn his name. Beautiful and heartbreaking poem. Gretchen
Comment Written 07-Jul-2023
Comment from tempeste
Ciao poet, yes their plight is very sad. Yet leaders look the other way.
I read that California has the most homeless because the Winters are milder than for example in New York.
It is a shame that these people don't receive more help..sleeping at night on the street they fall victim to gangs that torment them,
food, the cold and hygiene are on-going problems.
Many catch infectious diseases.
It's sad that America is sending billions to Ukraine for the war when its own people are going through harsh times coming out of a three-year-long pandemic that caused the economy to crash.
More people are ending up on the streets after losing their jobs and their homes.
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Ciao poet, yes their plight is very sad. Yet leaders look the other way.
I read that California has the most homeless because the Winters are milder than for example in New York.
It is a shame that these people don't receive more help..sleeping at night on the street they fall victim to gangs that torment them,
food, the cold and hygiene are on-going problems.
Many catch infectious diseases.
It's sad that America is sending billions to Ukraine for the war when its own people are going through harsh times coming out of a three-year-long pandemic that caused the economy to crash.
More people are ending up on the streets after losing their jobs and their homes.
Comment Written 07-Jul-2023
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
Homeless people have troubled lives and sometimes they cannot be helped as they don't want to help themselves or physically cannot help themselves. Your post is heartrendingly sad Jacqueline, love Dolly x
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Homeless people have troubled lives and sometimes they cannot be helped as they don't want to help themselves or physically cannot help themselves. Your post is heartrendingly sad Jacqueline, love Dolly x
Comment Written 07-Jul-2023
Comment from Lisasview
At first when I saw the image you chose I thought I had read this poem but as I reedit I realised that I had not...it was just that the same image was used by another person..Not sure if it is for the same contest or not.
You wrote beautifully the thoughts of a homeless man... Very good...
Lisasview, new to this site
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At first when I saw the image you chose I thought I had read this poem but as I reedit I realised that I had not...it was just that the same image was used by another person..Not sure if it is for the same contest or not.
You wrote beautifully the thoughts of a homeless man... Very good...
Lisasview, new to this site
Comment Written 07-Jul-2023
Comment from w.j.debi
Things can happen beyond our control. It is sad when others point and assign blame without knowing the story. This has a tender ending. At last the struggle is over and the young man is gathered home.
Best of luck in the contest.
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Things can happen beyond our control. It is sad when others point and assign blame without knowing the story. This has a tender ending. At last the struggle is over and the young man is gathered home.
Best of luck in the contest.
Comment Written 06-Jul-2023
Comment from Iza Deleanu
Such a sad story, but I think is the story of lots of people that are wandering in this world and want to find refuge in the arms of sweet death:""He was young.", some of them say
" I can't believe that he went to sleep and is gone.", on this 21st day of May.
This is my story, as I will no longer wander on the town streets
I went to my home this morning, when I had my last sleep." Thank you for sharing and good luck with your writings.
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Such a sad story, but I think is the story of lots of people that are wandering in this world and want to find refuge in the arms of sweet death:""He was young.", some of them say
" I can't believe that he went to sleep and is gone.", on this 21st day of May.
This is my story, as I will no longer wander on the town streets
I went to my home this morning, when I had my last sleep." Thank you for sharing and good luck with your writings.
Comment Written 06-Jul-2023
