Ancient Art of Poetry
Viewing comments for Chapter 17 "The first Knowing"A compilation of poems
8 total reviews
Comment from JSD
Brilliant again, in so many ways. Economy of style, naturally in a senyru, but each word carefully chosen for the best impact. Don't forget apostrophes though Lea! Love hot blushes - reminding of later hot flushes of menopause? 'Innocence' instead of 'naivety'? And I might have had the last line as 'New woman's love born'? But I'm nit-picking. This is another great poem! John
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2023
  |
Brilliant again, in so many ways. Economy of style, naturally in a senyru, but each word carefully chosen for the best impact. Don't forget apostrophes though Lea! Love hot blushes - reminding of later hot flushes of menopause? 'Innocence' instead of 'naivety'? And I might have had the last line as 'New woman's love born'? But I'm nit-picking. This is another great poem! John
Comment Written 13-Jun-2023
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2023
-
Thank you John yes my punctuation occasionally lacks. It's kind of funky once I put my pen to paper metaphor who's speaking. I can't get the words out fast enough. Different I know I need to stop and take the time attention to the little things as they say thank you so much again. Your words are so much appreciated any critique offers is greatly looked upon by me thanks again!
Comment from Mario PIERRE
I voted for you.....Very subtle and tender poem about coming of age. You expressed this in a very refined and pudic manner which makes this senryu so human.
Great job!
Mario
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2023
|
I voted for you.....Very subtle and tender poem about coming of age. You expressed this in a very refined and pudic manner which makes this senryu so human.
Great job!
Mario
Comment Written 09-Jun-2023
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2023
-
Thank you Mario! I am honored. For your kind review and insight I thank you again! I hope your evening is grand!
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Excellent haiku.
I like the presentation too. Concrete images are easy to visualize.
Good syllables count and connection between lines.
Good luck!!!
Gypsy
"Poetry heals the wounds inflicted by reason" -- Novalis
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2023
|
Excellent haiku.
I like the presentation too. Concrete images are easy to visualize.
Good syllables count and connection between lines.
Good luck!!!
Gypsy
"Poetry heals the wounds inflicted by reason" -- Novalis
Comment Written 09-Jun-2023
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2023
-
Thank you Gypsy! I'm so glad you liked this one! Thank you for your kind review for your comments. Appreciate it very much hope you have a great night!
Comment from ImaginosBuzzardoDesdinova
That first breath of true awakening is both refreshing and embarrassing. It turns the face pink and reveals our secret no matter how we try to hide it.
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2023
|
That first breath of true awakening is both refreshing and embarrassing. It turns the face pink and reveals our secret no matter how we try to hide it.
Comment Written 09-Jun-2023
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2023
-
Lol....yes indeed. When I was very young a boy ask me. "How far have you gone?" I didnt have a clue what he was talking about. I just said, "Oh I walked to the movies once" and left it at that.
Thank you so much for your kind review and for your insight and your time. I am very much appreciating it hope your day is great!
Comment from Nicki Nance
What a great application of a Senryu. I love your positive message about this miss coming into her sexuality. I think we put a target on our back when we only discuss the risks of sex with young people.
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2023
 |
What a great application of a Senryu. I love your positive message about this miss coming into her sexuality. I think we put a target on our back when we only discuss the risks of sex with young people.
Comment Written 08-Jun-2023
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2023
-
Thank you Nikki I'm so honored. I'm humbled by your rating and by your kind words. I appreciate it. You are very insightful yes indeed! I appreciate your time and you're fine rating and thank you very much -for reading and I hope your day is grand!
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
A lovely, well expressed coming of age senryu! I enjoyed reading this with its fine visual and I like the way the story here evolves as the girl becomes a woman and the line in the middle provides unity. Thanks for sharing and good luck! Debbie
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2023
|
A lovely, well expressed coming of age senryu! I enjoyed reading this with its fine visual and I like the way the story here evolves as the girl becomes a woman and the line in the middle provides unity. Thanks for sharing and good luck! Debbie
Comment Written 08-Jun-2023
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2023
-
Thank you so much! For a wonderful review from you! I very much appreciate it. For your time and effort and your kind reading? I thank you so much I hope that you're having a wonderful day!
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
These are difficult moments in a girls life when they take on the responsibility of becoming a woman with all the anxious times it brings, a poignant write, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2023
|
These are difficult moments in a girls life when they take on the responsibility of becoming a woman with all the anxious times it brings, a poignant write, love Dolly x
Comment Written 08-Jun-2023
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2023
-
Thank you so much for your kind review. I appreciate that very much especially from a season author as yourself! I appreciate your time and effort and hope that your day is wonderful!
Comment from Lisasview
Lovely image and background color.
Just the few words got right to the point... made good sense.
Ahhh, the beginning...I really did enjoy this read and I read it several times.
Lisa, new to this site
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2023
|
Lovely image and background color.
Just the few words got right to the point... made good sense.
Ahhh, the beginning...I really did enjoy this read and I read it several times.
Lisa, new to this site
Comment Written 08-Jun-2023
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2023
-
Hi Lisa once again thank you for your reviews. Very much appreciate your time and your effort absolutely! I'm glad you like this. I'm glad you got by and i'm welcome to find a story if I haven't said so long already! For your time and your kind comments I am most appreciative. Thank you for your wisdom. I hope you have a great day!
