Reviews from

Seasons of Change

Viewing comments for Chapter 10 "Seasons of Love and Marriage - 4"
A collection of 30 poems in thirty days

12 total reviews 
Comment from karenina
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

There is life after failed marriage! Sometimes it's better than we'd ever dreamed it could be! (Perhaps because we are more cautious?)

The joy of new beginnings bursts forth here... Out of the "slings and arrows of outrageous fortune" the Brd spoke of...to tenderly step again into the unlikely abyss of hope...

Wow. I'm so glad I'm gifted with a few hours to enjoy your verse!

Karenina

 Comment Written 30-Apr-2023


reply by the author on 30-Apr-2023
    Isn't it wonderful that we get are allowed a do-over! Chances are most can get it right the second time around.
reply by karenina on 30-Apr-2023
    Just like in sandlot baseball when I was a tomboyish gal... If I missed that pop-fly everyone would yell "Do-over!"

    (smile)
Comment from Pam (respa)
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

-Very nice image and presentation.
-A well written love story in poem form.
-I like how you include the daffodils in the poem.
-The verse describing Bonnie is done well
with the nature comparison.
-You give good background about each of your situations,
and how you told each reasons why marriage wouldn't work.
-But each of you had qualities that you appreciated in each other
that made the relationship work.
-A very good concluding verse about your marriage and
going forward together sharing hopes and dreams.
-You did a really good job with this and the project.
-Continued good wishes for it.

 Comment Written 10-Apr-2023


reply by the author on 10-Apr-2023
    Pam, thank you so very, very much! With a third of the month gone, I am feeling the reality of the depth oof challenge this contest brings.
reply by Pam (respa) on 10-Apr-2023
    You are very welcome, Jim. It is a huge challenge to take on. Continued good wishes for it.
Comment from Wendy G
Excellent
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Very well presented, and an honest account of how it often is when two disappointed people try once more to find love, that for which we all yearn. Very well written.
Wendy
Typo: "pangs of pain and gult." (guilt)

 Comment Written 09-Apr-2023


reply by the author on 09-Apr-2023
    Thank you very much Wendy.
Comment from Chrissy710
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Oh JLR, This is so nice to read, and I am so pleased you found your new love, Yor writing captures your true self, one of confidence and niceness and love for yourself. Good on you and this poem reflects everything good about marriage.

Cheers Chris

 Comment Written 09-Apr-2023


reply by the author on 09-Apr-2023
    Chris, Wow! Thank you for your six-star validation and supportive words.
Comment from lyenochka
Excellent
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That's wonderful that you met Bonnie and your were able to bring your families together! I liked that you got to know each other really well first and were honest with each other about marriage.

 Comment Written 08-Apr-2023


reply by the author on 08-Apr-2023
    Yes, indeed, she has been a soulmate from day one.
reply by lyenochka on 08-Apr-2023
    That's wonderful!
Comment from royowen
Excellent
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I'm sorry your first marriage didn't work, but you produced a daughter, the fruit of a relationship, and God certainly knew that meant to happen. I can't remember if you've shared anyone else Jim, but well done my friend, it gave you a wealth of experience and words to bless us with, beautifully written, blessings Roy

 Comment Written 08-Apr-2023


reply by the author on 08-Apr-2023
    Yes, and Bonniemhas become my soul mate, spouse, companion and champion. My son and daughter and her daughter have grown a tremendous bond that unites us in as a family unit.
reply by royowen on 08-Apr-2023
    What a wonderful witness
Comment from Verna Cole Mitchell
Excellent
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This was beautiful and warmed my heart. She sounds like a beautiful person. You had several lines in here that were gold: A young stallion galloping with a cautious gait, Carrying our new love, new hopes, and new dreams in locksteps with nature's rhythms.

 Comment Written 08-Apr-2023


reply by the author on 08-Apr-2023
    Verna, thank you, Bonnie is most definitely my soul mate, I am surely blest.
reply by Verna Cole Mitchell on 08-Apr-2023
    This makes me happy!
Comment from Tom Horonzy
Excellent
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The first stanza was delightfully professional. I assume it to be yours, since no notation is mentioned.
As for the rest, are you against writing it as a story rather than verse?
Lastly, the paragraph beginning with BONNIE has guilt spelled gult.

 Comment Written 08-Apr-2023


reply by the author on 08-Apr-2023
    Tom, there is a freedom I enjoy very much that comes from writing in the poetic style of free verse. This freedom allows the me the writer, to push the envelope, of traditional guardrails with out having to employ restrictive adherence to meter, rhyme. Here is a classic definition and information: Free verse
    Nonmetrical, nonrhyming lines that closely follow the natural rhythms of speech. A regular pattern of sound or rhythm may emerge in free-verse lines, but the poet does not adhere to a metrical plan in their composition. Matthew Arnold and Walt Whitman explored the possibilities of nonmetrical poetry in the 19th century. Since the early 20th century, the majority of published lyric poetry has been written in free verse. See the work of William Carlos Williams, T.S. Eliot, Ezra Pound, and H.D.
reply by Tom Horonzy on 08-Apr-2023
    Yes, I knew that, as I write predominately free verse myself. This piece though yelled helped, to me, and after the initial stanza would have been received more positively. Still, poetic license is ours to do as we please. As I originally stated, I liked it.
Comment from jmdg1954
Excellent
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This was a story told from the heart with a happy ending gif both people who found each other after troubled marriages.

All you need is the right partner.

Thank you for sharing.
John

 Comment Written 08-Apr-2023


reply by the author on 08-Apr-2023
    John, thanks and you are very correct, to willing partners.
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
Excellent
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This is a wonderful story Jim and I was so happy to read about this wonderful connection between you and your wife and how you met, a most enjoyable poem, love Dolly x

 Comment Written 08-Apr-2023


reply by the author on 08-Apr-2023
    Thank you very much, Bonnie is, for certain, the pure definition of soul mate.