Reviews from

Guided by Faith

Viewing comments for Chapter 2 "Faith Chapter 3"
Can faith guide our path?

35 total reviews 
Comment from lancellot
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Well written chapter. Proceeding, according to plan.

notes:

"I can lift 250 pounds. I doubt you {weight} that much."

-weigh

"Maybe, but I had to help the boys get their kite." and a reading group for children. Dancing with customer, because they like to dance. Singing in the church when asked.

- Do you really want your MCs to always be saints? Normal readers will not relate to people who are like this. I know it is part of your formula, just saying, it is something you may want to consider.

 Comment Written 12-Mar-2023


reply by the author on 13-Mar-2023
    I changed the weigh. Thank you for the kind review. Emma is far from perfect.
reply by lancellot on 13-Mar-2023
    Not perfect, saint

    She is too good. Stopping to help children fly kites, climbing trees to get stuck kites. Starting a children's reading group. Singing in the church. Dancing with old ladies. Working in her dad's restaurant. Good with her dog. Polite. Helpful. honest. (she would climb a tree to save a cat, right?) Wholesomely nice. Top of her class in college. (I'm sure she's a virgin).

    Do you see? She is either a nun or auditioning to be the First Lady.

    Just suggesting, that this is something to keep an eye on.
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2023
    She acts before she thinks. Just one of her many faults.
reply by lancellot on 13-Mar-2023
    That's not what I mean, but okay.
Comment from Anne Johnston
Excellent
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This is an interesting chapter. Emma seems to be someone who gets in a lot of scrapes, mostly because she is doing something for others. You have heightened the mystery about the car. I did notice one little type, "I doubt you weight that much," but someone else has probably already told you. Keep the story flowing.

 Comment Written 12-Mar-2023


reply by the author on 13-Mar-2023
    I have fixed the weigh, thank you for the kind review.
reply by Anne Johnston on 13-Mar-2023
    You are welcome
Comment from Sankey
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Another excellent read with just a couple of spags to look at. I am enjoying your new story. Keep it coming. Now the spags. were [i](o)n the ground.

He ran his hand through [t]his short brown hair

 Comment Written 12-Mar-2023


reply by the author on 13-Mar-2023
    Thank you for the catches. I have made the correction. I appreciate the help.
Comment from GWHARGIS
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

I don't think Seth comes across as bossy. He is in control. I feel like more of Emma's personality is coming out. She seemed borderline perfect in the first chapter. She is now coming across as human. I like how she knows Seth keeps having to take care of things for her , and she knows how she's coming across. She doesn't want him shaking his head all the time. Loved the humor in his response of "just you." That was perfect. I'm thinking this is going to be a romance but I like how they are circling each other and he is kind of hesitant. All on all this is going perfect. Gretchen

 Comment Written 12-Mar-2023


reply by the author on 13-Mar-2023
    Thank you for the kind review and encouragement.
Comment from Rosemary Everson1
Excellent
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Perhaps the unknown car is a phony? But who does the car belong to? This is a plot that produces a great presentation to the story. Your story is in the beginning chapters, presenting the characters takes time.

 Comment Written 12-Mar-2023


reply by the author on 13-Mar-2023
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Hello, Barbara, I'm enjoying following Emma and Seth interactions. Seth treats Emma like a protective father and I'm glad Emma let him know. However , I think it's very romantic. I never had that kind of relationship... I wish I had.

Well done! Good character development and engaging plot.

 Comment Written 12-Mar-2023


reply by the author on 12-Mar-2023
    Thank you for the encouragement.
Comment from judiverse
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Sounds like a great project for Emma to have a story time followed by an art session. That should be an attraction for the children during the summer. I'm not having a problem with Seth. I don't think Emma should require rescuing so frequently. Surely there are other ways in which Seth could become involved with her. She is a college graduate. Let her show her competency, and they can find other ways in which to get together. You have some real concerns going with the Crown Vic that keeps showing up near Emma's house, so there's bound to be some drama going there. Good job of keeping us in suspense. judi

 Comment Written 12-Mar-2023


reply by the author on 12-Mar-2023
    Emma will show herself in all sorts of ways. She has an issue of acting without thinking. Not necessarily danger. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from nomi338
Excellent
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I love it. This story is moseying along like a pleasant unhurried walk on a mild Summer afternoon. No hurry, no worry. Just ambling along. You are doing a great character study by highlighting the different personalities of Emma and Chet. Good work.

 Comment Written 12-Mar-2023


reply by the author on 12-Mar-2023
    Thank you for your wonderful support.
Comment from Jim Wile
Excellent
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The attraction is definitely growing between this pair. They seem to be opposites in several key ways: she more free-spirited and prone to leaping before looking, he to be more logical and controlled. Those kinds of opposites often make the best couples as they complement each other and balance each other out. My daughter and her boyfriend are like that as well as my wife and I to an extent.

Waiting for that first kiss! Nice job of writing, Barbara. Jim

 Comment Written 12-Mar-2023


reply by the author on 12-Mar-2023
    That first kiss will take a while. LOL Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from BethShelby
Excellent
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I love the way you create such different personalities for the characters in each of you stories. This one also seems it has a mystery developing right at the beginning. I think this well be fun to read. I enjoy the video about the dog. Those kinds of dogs are really cute. They have little faces that make they look like they are smiling.

 Comment Written 12-Mar-2023


reply by the author on 12-Mar-2023
    I had a Pom many years ago. She was a character, but a good dog. Thank you for the encouragement.