Red Skeletons
Viewing comments for Chapter 5 "Paralyzed by your Promises"Haunting Poetry for the Darkness in us all
9 total reviews
Comment from Rosemary Everson1
A woman in a relationship that's breaking her spirit might remain there for fear of what her leaving will bring. So she doesn't move forward. She doesn't know if she will find another to care for her.
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2023
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A woman in a relationship that's breaking her spirit might remain there for fear of what her leaving will bring. So she doesn't move forward. She doesn't know if she will find another to care for her.
Comment Written 01-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2023
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I use to feel stuck when I was younger. However, I am thankful that I continued and grew and now have so many blessings.
Comment from jaded831
I enjoyed the poem, it had good structure. I could feel the pain in your poem. I prefer happier poems, but we all know life has its sad moments. I hope the poem is fictional. Good luck with the contest.
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2023
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I enjoyed the poem, it had good structure. I could feel the pain in your poem. I prefer happier poems, but we all know life has its sad moments. I hope the poem is fictional. Good luck with the contest.
Comment Written 01-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2023
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Thank you.
Comment from Sandra Nelms-Ludwig
This is a good poem. The repetition is effectively used. The text is a great size. The message is clearly presented and easy to understand.
The spacing is off in this poem. I would lessen the space between verses and drop the first line down a space. The visual is just okay. It could be better. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2023
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This is a good poem. The repetition is effectively used. The text is a great size. The message is clearly presented and easy to understand.
The spacing is off in this poem. I would lessen the space between verses and drop the first line down a space. The visual is just okay. It could be better. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 01-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2023
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Thank you for taking the time to review.
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You are welcome.
Comment from Wendy G
I enjoyed reading your poem although the theme is a sad and depressing one. Yet it is probably what many if not most have experienced at some point. Best wishes for your entry.
Wendy
Suggestion: "Leaving my mind to wander" perhaps you need "wonder" here, as that would better fit the context.
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2023
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I enjoyed reading your poem although the theme is a sad and depressing one. Yet it is probably what many if not most have experienced at some point. Best wishes for your entry.
Wendy
Suggestion: "Leaving my mind to wander" perhaps you need "wonder" here, as that would better fit the context.
Comment Written 01-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2023
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It would indeed. I did not realize I made that mistake. Thank you.
Comment from lancellot
This is very good. It is sad and seems to come from a place of pain, loss and heart break... on the surface. But underneath, and upon a careful study of the words in each stanza, we can see a person with an unhealthy co-dependent emotional issue.
Deep poem.
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2023
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This is very good. It is sad and seems to come from a place of pain, loss and heart break... on the surface. But underneath, and upon a careful study of the words in each stanza, we can see a person with an unhealthy co-dependent emotional issue.
Deep poem.
Comment Written 27-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2023
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You have looked very deeply into this piece,and yes it does show an unhealthy co-dependent state. Something I use to have. I am better now and have a life I love. I would go through all the hurt again to end up where I am at.
Comment from Douglas Goff
Maybe he should have been more of the man you needed. Just a thought.
Great Repetition Poem entry. I think this may do well.
Thanks for sharing. Good work!
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2023
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Maybe he should have been more of the man you needed. Just a thought.
Great Repetition Poem entry. I think this may do well.
Thanks for sharing. Good work!
Comment Written 27-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2023
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That is very true. I am happy that even though I use to feel that way I never went as far as to end things. I stuck it out and have a wonderful life.
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Amen!
Comment from jessizero
I absolutely feel this one. I am sorry. You did an excellent job with the repetition prompt. Thank you so much for sharing your poem, and best wishes to you.
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2023
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I absolutely feel this one. I am sorry. You did an excellent job with the repetition prompt. Thank you so much for sharing your poem, and best wishes to you.
Comment Written 27-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2023
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Thank you. The pain I once felt comes out and I look back and think how I would do it again to be where I am today which is a better place and full of love.
I am so honored that by the stars. Thank you so much.
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
Sometimes we just can't please someone no matter what we do and perhaps they have a problem with themselves? We shouldn't blame ourselves for someone else's shortcomings, a poignant write with the repetition required for the contest, I wish you luck, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2023
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Sometimes we just can't please someone no matter what we do and perhaps they have a problem with themselves? We shouldn't blame ourselves for someone else's shortcomings, a poignant write with the repetition required for the contest, I wish you luck, love Dolly x
Comment Written 27-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2023
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Learning not to blame myself was a long and hard road indeed. I finally did find my place and people and am happy.
Comment from Bill Schott
This poem, Paralyzed by Your Promises, creates the image of a woman left feeling unworthy and then abandoned. Some cannot come back from such a slight. .......................................
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2023
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This poem, Paralyzed by Your Promises, creates the image of a woman left feeling unworthy and then abandoned. Some cannot come back from such a slight. .......................................
Comment Written 27-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2023
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That is all to true.
