haiku (a dark winter's night)
A Zen Haiku for the club challenge 5-6-515 total reviews
Comment from Jasmine Girl
I like the link between "lonely" and "empty wishing well". You described the art piece so well that I can feel the emotion it conveys. But "lonely" is a adjective and you are using it as a noun. I took me a second reading to get it.
Well done.
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2023
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I like the link between "lonely" and "empty wishing well". You described the art piece so well that I can feel the emotion it conveys. But "lonely" is a adjective and you are using it as a noun. I took me a second reading to get it.
Well done.
Comment Written 06-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2023
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Thank you very much, not much schooling at my end, I am learning grammar and punctuation through this site, I put lonely in the middle, is this what you mean? as always very much appreciated****kahpot
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Wow. It sounds much better. English is my second language but I have been in this country for 38 years.
Glad to help.
Comment from country ranch writer
As the cold wind settlesaround the are nothing but silence of the night stirs the col as it settles in for the night around the well. I think I will save my wish for a warmer day don't you think so?
SunfauFeb5-2023.
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2023
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As the cold wind settlesaround the are nothing but silence of the night stirs the col as it settles in for the night around the well. I think I will save my wish for a warmer day don't you think so?
SunfauFeb5-2023.
Comment Written 05-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2023
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Thank you very much, and yes a warmer day would be much nicer, as always very much appreciated****kahpot
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Snikes
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Snikes
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Hello, Kym,
Excellent Zen Haiku for the club. Wonderful presentation and imagery. I love the satori line... empty wishing well... it's so thought-provoking, as good haiku should be. Well done!
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2023
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Hello, Kym,
Excellent Zen Haiku for the club. Wonderful presentation and imagery. I love the satori line... empty wishing well... it's so thought-provoking, as good haiku should be. Well done!
Comment Written 05-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2023
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Thank you so much for your encouraging comments, as always very much appreciated****kahpot
Comment from AP Apgar
I like your 5/6/5 haiku modern poem- excellent picture presentation of a dark and lonely night - goes well with the poem- words could present a double meaning - nice ! - ' falls upon the lonely' perhaps- lonely people would make a wish in the wishing well- or a lonely wishing well- with no customers - poem has a good flow as "well" - good job!
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2023
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I like your 5/6/5 haiku modern poem- excellent picture presentation of a dark and lonely night - goes well with the poem- words could present a double meaning - nice ! - ' falls upon the lonely' perhaps- lonely people would make a wish in the wishing well- or a lonely wishing well- with no customers - poem has a good flow as "well" - good job!
Comment Written 05-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2023
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Thank you, AP your comments are very encouraging, as always very much appreciated****kahpot
Comment from harmony13
The first two lines of this poem flow and connect well. The last line
puts the poem all together! I really found the author addressing the theme with words that are so true. The poem flows and connects well. The
artwork goes well with this poem. Have a great Sunday!....Maria
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2023
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The first two lines of this poem flow and connect well. The last line
puts the poem all together! I really found the author addressing the theme with words that are so true. The poem flows and connects well. The
artwork goes well with this poem. Have a great Sunday!....Maria
Comment Written 05-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2023
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Thank you so very much, as always very much appreciated****kahpot
Comment from Pam (respa)
-Very nice artwork and presentation, kahpot.
-You wrote a good haiku with a good topic.
-Effective nature and seasonal imagery.
-You set the scene in the first line and
show how it affects the lonely.
-A very good satori line that follows that theme.
-Well done.
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2023
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-Very nice artwork and presentation, kahpot.
-You wrote a good haiku with a good topic.
-Effective nature and seasonal imagery.
-You set the scene in the first line and
show how it affects the lonely.
-A very good satori line that follows that theme.
-Well done.
Comment Written 05-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2023
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Thank you so very much, as always very much appreciated****kahpot
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You are welcome, kahpot.
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
A wonderful atmospheric write for the Haiku club and I enjoyed the sentiments within, our wishes remain inside the well until morning, much enjoyed, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2023
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A wonderful atmospheric write for the Haiku club and I enjoyed the sentiments within, our wishes remain inside the well until morning, much enjoyed, love Dolly x
Comment Written 05-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2023
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Thank you very much, as always very much appreciated****kahpot
Comment from LateBloomer
Hi Kahpot, well done haiku and good sensory appeal.
I especially liked:
empty wishing well
(K, nice play on the word empty. I can feel the yin-yang of it all)
Beautiful photo choice and presentation. Keep the blue waters flowing.
LateBloomer
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2023
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Hi Kahpot, well done haiku and good sensory appeal.
I especially liked:
empty wishing well
(K, nice play on the word empty. I can feel the yin-yang of it all)
Beautiful photo choice and presentation. Keep the blue waters flowing.
LateBloomer
Comment Written 05-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2023
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Thank you so very much, as always, very much appreciated****kahpot
Comment from Wendy G
This is excellent, implying so much. The lonely - to me these are the vulnerable, and perhaps they are devoid of hope and wishes because of bitter past experience. I sense that the night is also a darkness of the soul, an emptiness because of lack of relationships, reflected in the empty wishing well. Thought-provoking!!
Wendy
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2023
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This is excellent, implying so much. The lonely - to me these are the vulnerable, and perhaps they are devoid of hope and wishes because of bitter past experience. I sense that the night is also a darkness of the soul, an emptiness because of lack of relationships, reflected in the empty wishing well. Thought-provoking!!
Wendy
Comment Written 04-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2023
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Thank you for a very understanding review, as always very much appreciated****kahpot
Comment from June Sargent
Lovely and poignant zen haiku for the club. Loneliness does conjure images of emptiness. In this case, the well did not provide any comfort, empty of wishes. Very sad and touching.
reply by the author on 04-Feb-2023
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Lovely and poignant zen haiku for the club. Loneliness does conjure images of emptiness. In this case, the well did not provide any comfort, empty of wishes. Very sad and touching.
Comment Written 04-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 04-Feb-2023
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Thank you so very much, as always very much appreciated****kahpot
