Heart Crafted Poems - 2023
Viewing comments for Chapter 11 "Children's Spring"Musing of an old man
42 total reviews
Comment from Aussie
SPAG: second last line 'constant'. Next line 'their' - apart from that. This is a lovely ode to spring. I liked it very much. No snow here, we live in sub-tropics. No squirrels either. I saw them in Europe. Our native animals are unique. Good luck in the contest. K xx
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reply by the author on 03-Feb-2023
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SPAG: second last line 'constant'. Next line 'their' - apart from that. This is a lovely ode to spring. I liked it very much. No snow here, we live in sub-tropics. No squirrels either. I saw them in Europe. Our native animals are unique. Good luck in the contest. K xx
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 02-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2023
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Hi My Friend, For me I had a personal experience as a child that the forget part has become like a sheath. After loads of therapy and finally able to go to that parents grave and let our my screams, shouts and tears, I came to a place of forgiveness. The forget part since the has not been the shackles of the past ?. But forget ut uh.
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Fix it and I will upgrade the rating.
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Never forgotten, just forgiven.
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Done and thanks for the consideration.
Comment from dragonpoet
Hi Jim,
This seems to be a altered form of the sonnet. It surely does show the signs of Spring with all the animal movement and lack of snow. But no mention of first flowers budding. I like the repetition that forms the couplet.
Good luck in the contest.
Keep writing and stay healthy
Joan
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2023
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Hi Jim,
This seems to be a altered form of the sonnet. It surely does show the signs of Spring with all the animal movement and lack of snow. But no mention of first flowers budding. I like the repetition that forms the couplet.
Good luck in the contest.
Keep writing and stay healthy
Joan
Comment Written 02-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2023
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Joan, I send smiles of thanks back.
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No problem, Jim.
Have a great weekend.
Joan
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Wonderful entry for the Children's Poetry Contest.
Good rhyme and meter that doesn't sound forced. Nice presentation and excellent imagery of nature.
Good luck in the contest.
Gypsy
"The poet waits quietly to paint the unsaid." - Atticus
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2023
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Wonderful entry for the Children's Poetry Contest.
Good rhyme and meter that doesn't sound forced. Nice presentation and excellent imagery of nature.
Good luck in the contest.
Gypsy
"The poet waits quietly to paint the unsaid." - Atticus
Comment Written 02-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2023
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Thank you for your validation which I value.
Comment from Mary Shifman
This is a charming poem about Spring, and I certainly can use the promise of better weather. We still have a lot of snow here and it's supposed to drop to -19 tomorrow. I know it's only February but bring on Spring!!! I really like the picture, too. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2023
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This is a charming poem about Spring, and I certainly can use the promise of better weather. We still have a lot of snow here and it's supposed to drop to -19 tomorrow. I know it's only February but bring on Spring!!! I really like the picture, too. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 02-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2023
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Mary thank you and yes we still have the Brrr of winter reluctantly letting go,
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You are welcome.
Comment from Anne Johnston
This is a delightful children's poem, rhymes well and is fun to read. I guess now that we are in February we are all thinking of spring, even though tomorrow is supposed to be a very cold day here in Quebec.
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2023
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This is a delightful children's poem, rhymes well and is fun to read. I guess now that we are in February we are all thinking of spring, even though tomorrow is supposed to be a very cold day here in Quebec.
Comment Written 02-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2023
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Dear Anne, yes we still have old man winter gripping to the season not wanting to change. We will have a low of -7 Celsius tonight and taken a high midday of 14 Celsius.
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You are very welcome
Comment from jmdg1954
An excellent children's poem looking ahead to spring.
This was an easy read with good cadence and rhymes.
I believe fresbee's should be frisbee.
Good luck in the contest.
Cheers. John
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2023
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An excellent children's poem looking ahead to spring.
This was an easy read with good cadence and rhymes.
I believe fresbee's should be frisbee.
Good luck in the contest.
Cheers. John
Comment Written 02-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2023
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John, thank you,
Comment from Sarah Das Gupta
A hopeful poem heralding spring. The picture is delightful with its promise of summer to follow. The regular rhyming scheme gives a strong backbone to the theme.
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2023
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A hopeful poem heralding spring. The picture is delightful with its promise of summer to follow. The regular rhyming scheme gives a strong backbone to the theme.
Comment Written 02-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2023
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Thank you Srah, I just completed a final edit.
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Best wishes!
Comment from l.raven
Hi Jim, as I sit here freezing...LOL...
but I must say...your poem did cheer me up...
and I think I'm even warmer now my sweet friend...
I love your description in your children's poem...
of this beautiful Spring day...reminds me of when
I was young...those were the days...
I love your poem...and your picture is precious...
so very nicely written...love Linda xxoo
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2023
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Hi Jim, as I sit here freezing...LOL...
but I must say...your poem did cheer me up...
and I think I'm even warmer now my sweet friend...
I love your description in your children's poem...
of this beautiful Spring day...reminds me of when
I was young...those were the days...
I love your poem...and your picture is precious...
so very nicely written...love Linda xxoo
Comment Written 02-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2023
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Linda, Thank you for the wonderful validation.
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your so very welcome Jim....
love xxoo
Comment from jacquelyn popp
What a sweet and enjoyable children's poem. You're rhyming pattern was good and the flow of your words, nicely done. This was a nice and enjoyable read. The artwork went well with your poem. Thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2023
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What a sweet and enjoyable children's poem. You're rhyming pattern was good and the flow of your words, nicely done. This was a nice and enjoyable read. The artwork went well with your poem. Thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 02-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2023
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Smiles back.
Comment from Jasmine Girl
I'm impressed that you can get children to garden. I guess it's a fun outdoor activities for children. It must be warm in your neck of woods. But for us here in Midwest, it will be tow to three more months of winter. It hasn't been too cold since last Christmas's big chill. We will be in Spain for three weeks. Then winter will be over. We have had a lot of wonderful skiing experience this winter.
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2023
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I'm impressed that you can get children to garden. I guess it's a fun outdoor activities for children. It must be warm in your neck of woods. But for us here in Midwest, it will be tow to three more months of winter. It hasn't been too cold since last Christmas's big chill. We will be in Spain for three weeks. Then winter will be over. We have had a lot of wonderful skiing experience this winter.
Comment Written 02-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2023
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Enjoy, enjoy! Thanks for your comments.
