Comment from estory

Excellent

I think you have the classic happy ending to this one as Gabe carries his bride into the bedroom. As always the dialogue is crisp, there's plenty of emotion in it, it's realistic and the characters are well defined and mesh into the story perfectly. Plenty of polish on it. But it's been so long I'd forgotten where you were in the story. estory

 Comment Written 16-Jan-2023

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reply by the author on 16-Jan-2023

This story is complete. It's at an editor's and she suggested I add and epilogue.

reply by estory on 18-Jan-2023

Good luck with it. estory

Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell

Excellent

Aw, thank you for writing this, it finished that story off perfectly. It took me a few seconds, but I was soon right back with them again. Well done, my friend. :)) Sandra xx

 Comment Written 16-Jan-2023

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reply by the author on 16-Jan-2023

Thank you for the kind review.

Comment from lancellot

Excellent

Good luck on the final edits.

As Gabriel carried her inside, Jeremey ran down the stairs. "Mom and Dad are back!"

- are you sure about the Dad part?

Jordan walked in the front door, with Gabriel's {parent}, Rebecca and Harold.

- parents

 Comment Written 16-Jan-2023

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reply by the author on 16-Jan-2023

I fixed the parent. I was concerned about the 'dad' part two. I've been playing with it. Jeremey is young. He might call Gabriel 'dad'. The older boys would still call him 'Coach'. I'll see what the others say.

reply by lancellot on 16-Jan-2023

I just meant so soon. If I remember correctly, Jeremy and Gabe didn't have too many scenes together (Gabe interacted more with the eldest boy.), and the novel covered weeks.

reply by the author on 17-Jan-2023

Jeremey called Gabe's parents grandma and grandpa. He also invited Gabe to the Dad's eat lunch at school with him. He always hugged and kissed his cheek goodnight. I think after 18 months he'd call him dad. Not 100% sure.

Comment from cat frenette

Excellent

What a lovely ending to a new beginning!
I thoroughly enjoyed your story, and love that it ended after the honeymoon.
I look forward to reading more of your stories - they're so heartfelt.

 Comment Written 16-Jan-2023

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reply by the author on 16-Jan-2023

Thank you for the kind review. Please drop by again.

Comment from Jasmine Girl

Excellent

I thought you had finished this book a year ago. I'm glad that you decide to write an Epilogue 2.
I found a typo: French Rivera -> French Riviera.

Among all the choices (Puerto Rico, Montana cabin and French Riviera,) I choose Nice, the French Riviera. I have been all these places but Nice has it all.

Well done.

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 Comment Written 16-Jan-2023

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reply by the author on 16-Jan-2023

Thank you for the catch. I have made the correction. I appreciate the help.

reply by Jasmine Girl on 16-Jan-2023

I'm glad to help. I'm thinking about reposting a novel that I have started more than a year ago.

reply by the author on 16-Jan-2023

makes sense

Comment from Ulla

Excellent

Hi Barbara, this is a great revised epilogue to your story. I liked it a lot. Now I will be focusing on your other novel which is also coming to an end. All best, Ulla xx

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 Comment Written 16-Jan-2023

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reply by the author on 16-Jan-2023

I sure can. Thank you for the kind review.