Quiet Lawyer
Viewing comments for Chapter 45 "Quiet Lawyer Chapter 22 B"Can a broken heart be mended?
32 total reviews
Comment from Judy Lawless
Wow, lots going on in this one, Barbara! That Pat remains an arrogant sob. Alexandra proved how tough she can be when she is defending her clients. Well done.
One little spag: "but I'll take him to trail(trial) before
reply by the author on 14-Nov-2022
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Wow, lots going on in this one, Barbara! That Pat remains an arrogant sob. Alexandra proved how tough she can be when she is defending her clients. Well done.
One little spag: "but I'll take him to trail(trial) before
Comment Written 13-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 14-Nov-2022
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I have made the correction. Thank you for catching it. I appreciate the kind review.
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You're most welcome, Barbara.
Comment from wierdgrace
must tell you, I'm just starting to read the stories posted, and poems, coming in at this chapter, was a bit confusing, so...Im going back and start from the beginning, I see this could be a series, a great book, but I need to know your characters, I write science fiction and fantasy and just publisher 3rd book, but I could not have done that without fan story, I joined 2010, and left becuz of illness, just came back, so bare with me I will read your book. thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2022
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must tell you, I'm just starting to read the stories posted, and poems, coming in at this chapter, was a bit confusing, so...Im going back and start from the beginning, I see this could be a series, a great book, but I need to know your characters, I write science fiction and fantasy and just publisher 3rd book, but I could not have done that without fan story, I joined 2010, and left becuz of illness, just came back, so bare with me I will read your book. thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 13-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2022
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Not a problem. If I can help in anyway, let me know. I appreciate your reviewing.
Comment from Wayne Fowler
Very nicely done. Good plot movement.
I liked the dialogue. But am I to understand that the women will only get $1000 per month, no up front down payment? hmmm.
Best wishes.
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2022
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Very nicely done. Good plot movement.
I liked the dialogue. But am I to understand that the women will only get $1000 per month, no up front down payment? hmmm.
Best wishes.
Comment Written 13-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2022
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Yes, for now. LOL Someone believes this would never happen anyway. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Pam Lonsdale
This is the first time I've read one of your chapters - I hate to come in on the middle of a story, but I figured I owed you a read as you have been so kind to me, reading and reviewing my work. I think I can keep reading, based on this chapter, and still not be too much in the dark. I enjoyed this - it felt as though I was overhearing a real conversation, which is a sign of well-written dialogue in a story. Looking forward to more:-)
Just a couple of nits:
Paragraph that begins "I doubt we'll get the full amount . . ." take him to TRIAL, not TRAIL
Cordero ran his hand through HIS short hair instead of THIS short hair.
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2022
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This is the first time I've read one of your chapters - I hate to come in on the middle of a story, but I figured I owed you a read as you have been so kind to me, reading and reviewing my work. I think I can keep reading, based on this chapter, and still not be too much in the dark. I enjoyed this - it felt as though I was overhearing a real conversation, which is a sign of well-written dialogue in a story. Looking forward to more:-)
Just a couple of nits:
Paragraph that begins "I doubt we'll get the full amount . . ." take him to TRIAL, not TRAIL
Cordero ran his hand through HIS short hair instead of THIS short hair.
Comment Written 13-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2022
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I had fixed the first one. I am wonder why it didn't take. Hmm, I know I saved it, because it's still saved in an open tab. Oh well, computers. Thank you for the catches, I struggle with the little words. LOL I appreciate the help.
Comment from Sankey
This has got to be one of the best Chapters, so far in your book. The drama you portray is so real. As I have said before, we know these things do happen in real life. Well done. No spags.
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2022
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This has got to be one of the best Chapters, so far in your book. The drama you portray is so real. As I have said before, we know these things do happen in real life. Well done. No spags.
Comment Written 13-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2022
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Thank you for the kind review. I had a reviewer tell me that this was so far out in left field that he couldn't completely read it. He stopped part way through.
Comment from BethShelby
Ali is a very tough lawyer. It is good thing the Sherriff is willing to do what she asks. HE bluffs paid off. I would be feel very sorry for anyone who get pregnant from a rapist. It is good thing she has supportive parents and in-laws. You have written this chapter so well I'm sure you held everyone attention.
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2022
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Ali is a very tough lawyer. It is good thing the Sherriff is willing to do what she asks. HE bluffs paid off. I would be feel very sorry for anyone who get pregnant from a rapist. It is good thing she has supportive parents and in-laws. You have written this chapter so well I'm sure you held everyone attention.
Comment Written 13-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2022
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Cindy Decker 2
Barbara,
Your story is getting very interesting. The suspense of an impending trial, and a lost pregnant woman are nice touches.
One more, Barbara: in the paragraph starting with, "I doubt we'll get ..." the word trial is misspelled.
Great story.
Blessings,
Cindy
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2022
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Barbara,
Your story is getting very interesting. The suspense of an impending trial, and a lost pregnant woman are nice touches.
One more, Barbara: in the paragraph starting with, "I doubt we'll get ..." the word trial is misspelled.
Great story.
Blessings,
Cindy
Comment Written 13-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2022
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Thank you for the catch. I have made the correction. I appreciate your kind review.
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You?re welcome, Barbara.
Nice story.
Comment from lancellot
Structurally, your writing and editing are great. I'm afraid I stopped half way through. I think you as they say, "Jumped the shark" too much in this chapter. The reader gets it. Men bad, women super, but wow.
I wish you good luck.
Judge Pickett said, "I enjoyed watching you work."
- I understand why you wrote this. but do you think a judge (a good one) would ever say this?
"You're doing wonderfully.
- What did they do?
"I doubt we'll get the full amount, but I'll take him to {trail} before I accept pennies.
-trial
"I can and just did. I have probable cause because of what I witnessed.
- What???
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2022
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Structurally, your writing and editing are great. I'm afraid I stopped half way through. I think you as they say, "Jumped the shark" too much in this chapter. The reader gets it. Men bad, women super, but wow.
I wish you good luck.
Judge Pickett said, "I enjoyed watching you work."
- I understand why you wrote this. but do you think a judge (a good one) would ever say this?
"You're doing wonderfully.
- What did they do?
"I doubt we'll get the full amount, but I'll take him to {trail} before I accept pennies.
-trial
"I can and just did. I have probable cause because of what I witnessed.
- What???
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 13-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2022
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I'm so sorry you feel this way, but it's your choice.
Comment from nomi338
Pat Rogers is a one man wrecking crew. He just destroying the lives of women right and left. He deserves to be in prison without any power to mess up another woman's life ever. What a piece of work. I am keeping it clean, but that is not what I really want to call him. I love the was Ali is dealing him damaging blow after blow.
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2022
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Pat Rogers is a one man wrecking crew. He just destroying the lives of women right and left. He deserves to be in prison without any power to mess up another woman's life ever. What a piece of work. I am keeping it clean, but that is not what I really want to call him. I love the was Ali is dealing him damaging blow after blow.
Comment Written 13-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2022
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Ulla
Hi Barbara, this was a great chapter and the deal was very well negotiated. But now Lisa is pregnant by the rapist. Personally, I wouldn't hesitate to have an abortion. I couldn't bear to carry a child from such a vile man and vile act. It's very well written.
I just found a minor thing:
In (the) hallway
Ulla:)))
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2022
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Hi Barbara, this was a great chapter and the deal was very well negotiated. But now Lisa is pregnant by the rapist. Personally, I wouldn't hesitate to have an abortion. I couldn't bear to carry a child from such a vile man and vile act. It's very well written.
I just found a minor thing:
In (the) hallway
Ulla:)))
Comment Written 13-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 13-Nov-2022
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I hate those small words. I always leave them out. Thank you for the catch and the kind review.
