Once My Dazzling Star
My life fell dark when she left.2 total reviews
Comment from Kaiku
I had a difficult time with this poem. The subject matter was great and the praise was consistent until the word 'vile' was used. 'My sky churning dark with vile storm clouds' didn't seem to fit your overall expression of gratefulness. I felt it harsh without a supporting cast or further explanation.
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2022
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I had a difficult time with this poem. The subject matter was great and the praise was consistent until the word 'vile' was used. 'My sky churning dark with vile storm clouds' didn't seem to fit your overall expression of gratefulness. I felt it harsh without a supporting cast or further explanation.
Comment Written 02-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2022
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The clouds turned dark because my shining star was gone. It was meant to connote harshness. Thanks for your feedback.
Comment from Raul1
This poem meets the requirements for the contest. It is interesting and entertaining to read. Excellent work! No mistakes found in your poem. I like it. Thank you for sharing! Good luck!
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2022
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This poem meets the requirements for the contest. It is interesting and entertaining to read. Excellent work! No mistakes found in your poem. I like it. Thank you for sharing! Good luck!
Comment Written 30-Sep-2022
reply by the author on 30-Sep-2022
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Thank you for taking the time to read and review. Appreciated.
