Reviews from

Mike's job

Who would do ...

8 total reviews 
Comment from K.L. Rockquemore
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I love this story!!
I agree that supernatural does not have to mean scary or creepy.
This is so well written and cleverly composed. Your writing grabbed me from the start and did not let go until the heartwarming end.
After a stressful day this was a joy to read before bed. Thank you for sharing.

 Comment Written 22-Jun-2022


reply by the author on 22-Jun-2022
    I am so pleased you enjoyed it! Thank you for the encouragement. I greatly appreciate your review.
    Wendy
Comment from Tom Horonzy
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

If this: Supernatural does not need to be scary. I wanted a warm story. A relative experienced some strange events the morning after her partner�¢??s death... was what you wanted, you met your expectation very well. DO you take your tea with lemon?

 Comment Written 20-Jun-2022


reply by the author on 20-Jun-2022
    Thanks so much Tom. I appreciate your words and yes, I did what I wanted but I hope others don?t mind it not being too scary. You always make me smile.
Comment from Pam Lonsdale
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I like that you went with the "warm story" instead of a scary one. This is a heartwarming story, and I can imagine how comforting a scene like this would be.

Very creative and engaging.

 Comment Written 19-Jun-2022


reply by the author on 19-Jun-2022
    Thank you Pam. Your kind review means a lot.
Comment from Wayne Fowler
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Very cool story. Nice work. Well written.
There, on the kitchen table, was a mug of steaming hot tea - Grammatically, these commas are not needed, but for dramatic effect, I think they are fine.
Best wishes and good luck in the contest - I'd vote for you.

 Comment Written 19-Jun-2022


reply by the author on 19-Jun-2022
    Thank you Wayne. I greatly appreciate the honour of six stars (and the vote too!) and you are perfectly right about the commas. I wanted them to make pauses and hopefully be more effective in the reading. Thanks for your insight.
Comment from Bill Schott
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This story, Mike's Job, is constructed with great care to bring Mike to life for the readers, both within Meg's reminiscence and literally as his spirit comes to assist during the current trials. Warmth abounds within this reader now.

 Comment Written 19-Jun-2022


reply by the author on 19-Jun-2022
    Thank you Bill! I greatly appreciate the six stars, particularly as I wanted to avoid scary ghosts etc. The supernatural is just that, and can be unexpected God given gifts. Many thanks.
Comment from leather
Good
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

The picture featured in this poem is very appropriate. The poem seems to center on grief, sorrow, and daily chores. The eighth paragraph has a grammatical error.

Grammar tip: Always remember this rule about the usage of was and were: Use were with expressions that are hypothetical, wishful, imagined, desired, doubtful, and otherwise contrary to fact--that is to say, not real.

Best wishes.

 Comment Written 19-Jun-2022


reply by the author on 19-Jun-2022
    Thank you for your review. Appreciated.
reply by leather on 19-Jun-2022
    You're welcome.
Comment from Scott Rhodie
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

There's a belief somewhere that Mike's health will improve. The couple are interacting in a way that takes them along the road they both need to go in order to achieve this. A kind of spiritual out of the ordinary is happening. Maybe the supernatural of the mind. Nice little story.

 Comment Written 19-Jun-2022


reply by the author on 19-Jun-2022
    Mike died. Sorry I thought that would be conveyed by "gone". I?ll need to edit it. Thanks for reviewing. I appreciate it.
Comment from Averil Drummond
Good
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Well, wouldn't we all love it if this sort of thing really happened. It's a charming story, supernatural but not scary. But I'm afraid for me the writing is just a bit too cut and dried. Like a sort of shopping list of their activities. It's not really my place to make suggestions but I think you could incorporate all the lovely bits by maybe having her wandering around the farm doing all Mike's jobs a few weeks later and thinking about things. Then she goes back to the kitchen and sees the steaming mug of tea. That's a great ending. Sometimes less is more. In any case I wouldn't use 'How strange' twice.

 Comment Written 19-Jun-2022


reply by the author on 19-Jun-2022
    Thank you for your review and suggestions. I don?t believe supernatural needs to be scary. That?s why I wrote it as I did. I wanted a warm story. And I wanted "How strange" twice for effect. I also wanted it straight after his death as a situation a bit like this happened to a relative. Thanks though.